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I have a good work relationship with my former boss and who is now one of the influential person in higher management. Once I was in trouble at work when I was in another work location and he helped with his influence to get out of that trouble when I approached him.

Now after long time I have been came to the same work location and thought to formally met him. Since he is so busy i couldn't get his time to meet.

Now finally I got a chance to meet him. However I am again fall in trouble at work and in a needy situation. Definitely he is going to ask me about my situation at work when I met him. Definitely I can not hide those details. Even if I hide those some time later those can be revealed through some another channels.

Now if I speak about those troubles, he might think that I am meeting him when only I am in trouble and which is not correct as I am trying to meet him since from long time. How to maintain the situation healthy in such a way that he didn't get any unhealthy feeling and still maintain good work relationship.

If I delay the meeting I am not sure when I can get his time to meet.

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I am confused as to what the actual problem you are trying to solve here is. Is it that you do not want to talk to him about the problem or that you do not want him thinking you need his help solving it? – Chad Nov 28 '12 at 18:17
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I think the answer to this question is to get your act together and prioritize your goals and review policies so you don't find yourself in trouble at work. When I'm doing well at work, my boss wants to talk about things outside of work(personal likes, hobbies) but if I mess up, it's all about work.... – Jeff Nov 28 '12 at 21:29
@Chad: I came to the same work location after a long time. It is courteous to meet him and say hi and have casual chat. How ever I don't want he to feel that I am reachinghim when I am only in troubles. – Ramya Nov 29 '12 at 5:49

4 Answers

up vote 0 down vote accepted

Go and meet him. Take good care that the discussion doesn't go to that topic.

When the topic comes in the discussion, tell him that "I am doing so and so and things are moving positive direction and I hope I can come out with that trouble very soon". And move on to the other topic.

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up vote 17 down vote

Meet him, but don't bring up the situation yourself.

It things do come to light during your meeting, explain that you are not asking for him to be involved and that you really only wanted to meet so you could catch up and you were not meeting in order for him to bail you out again.

If you make it clear that you were not looking for his involvement when you wanted to meet up, then he should know that this is not the only reason you want to see him.

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up vote 3 down vote

It depends on the depth of your pre-trouble contact. Obviously he likes you and had enough trust in you to help you in the past.

I like the idea of meeting with him and not being the one who brings up current problems. But if he probes and asks - tell the truth, but say - flat out - that you didn't bring it up, because you don't want to only come to him when you're in trouble. Also, before he can ask probing questions, express your regret that the last time you were in his area, he was too busy to meet with you. It's certainly complimentary that you seek him out (even when you aren't in trouble) and he should know that you tried.

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up vote -3 down vote

How to maintain the situation healthy in such a way that he didn't get any unhealthy feeling and still maintain good work relationship.

The only way to do that is leave him out of this last "trouble".

It does appear you are coming to him only when you are in trouble.

If you don't want to give him these unhealthy feelings you should really try to solve it via some other method, i.e. - without him.

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