347
votes
18answers
72k views

How should I deal with an employee who has slept with my wife?

I'm the owner of a business with about 30-40 employees. Recently, I found out that one of my employees has been having an affair with my wife. The employee has worked for me for 4 years. I felt like I ...
259
votes
19answers
69k views

Is it rude to leave an interview early if you have already made your decision?

A friend of mine went on an interview recently for a software developer position at a well known company. It was a senior position, and he had very relevant business experience in the industry. I ...
222
votes
20answers
53k views

What is a 'friendly' way to let managers know that having good developers is a privilege?

I work for a small company, where we recently had a change of managers. The new manager has no experience managing developers, and the old manager has moved into a development role to fill in gaps ...
173
votes
19answers
59k views

How can I overcome “years of experience” requirements when applying to positions?

Having just been rejected as a candidate for a job because I do not show the requisite number of years experience, I have some questions about how "years of experience" is interpreted by hiring ...
149
votes
4answers
12k views

What should I do when my dream company is interested in me before my skills are developed?

There is a company I adore and working there would be my dream job. My plan was to continue working on my programming skills (which are currently underdeveloped) and then start contributing to this ...
133
votes
10answers
12k views

How do you decide when to go home for the day?

As a salaried software developer, I've worked in a few environments where I've been told "we don't have 9-5 hours here, we just expect you to get your work done". Which sounds idealistic, except that ...
117
votes
11answers
10k views

I worked for a company affiliated with a very publicly failed project. Should I take it off my resume?

I worked briefly for a company that had a recent highly publicized failed government project (I'm sure you can probably guess). While I did not work on that particular project, I think all the bad ...
112
votes
10answers
20k views

Team members spending too much time on Stack Overflow

Almost 8 months ago, I introduced encouraged my team members to follow Stack Overflow so that they can read questions, help others, and build their skills. But now this has gotten out of hand. I have ...
112
votes
14answers
7k views

How can I tell people to get to the point?

I've recently come to a work place where people use a lot of useless business lingo and generally inflate communications with long unproductive fluff. I frequently find myself nodding and hoping they ...
110
votes
13answers
12k views

How can I prepare for getting hit by a bus?

As a member of small teams, I had significant responsibility. Whether driving progress by organizing meetings or maintaining/creating/understanding a large percentage of specific technical ...
107
votes
4answers
16k views

How can I determine a reasonable salary to ask for?

I'm looking for a comprehensive answer to this question, not short answers that just tell me one piece of the equation. The ideal answer should include: How can I determine the average salary rate ...
103
votes
11answers
27k views

Project Manager asks for complete 100% confidence everytime committing code

I've got an ongoing relationship with a long term business partner as a consultant where his role is project manager (task manager + direction), and my role is a contracted developer. He has a ...
103
votes
13answers
12k views

Should I list skills on my résumé if I have no interest in using them again?

I’m a software developer and over the course of my (short) career I’ve gained experience with a whole bunch of programming languages, libraries, frameworks, applications, and concepts. Taken together ...
98
votes
9answers
19k views

Is it ethical to read programming books on the clock?

I have an issue that hasn't ever surfaced as a problem, but it's a question that's been bugging me internally a little bit for the last several years. I've worked at a few different places where they ...
95
votes
10answers
7k views

Could asking questions online damage my professional reputation?

I like to post quite a lot of questions online, on Stack Exchange and other locations such as GitHub. Despite my best efforts to research before asking and to ask good questions, sometimes I feel that ...
94
votes
4answers
10k views

Why do companies not want to hire over qualified people?

I've heard stories of how people looking for jobs have been turned down by companies because they are over-qualified, even when they are willing to take a (sometime substantial) pay-cut. Why do ...
88
votes
11answers
26k views

How can I respond to “Why shouldn't we hire you?”

Can someone please explain what the employer wants to get from the question, "Why shouldn't we hire you?" What type of answers are generally acceptable responses to this question?
87
votes
17answers
22k views

How can I encourage a culture of punctuality in a software company?

As a new technical lead in a new company, what are some additional strategies to employ to change the culture of the development team so that people show up at the time that I've requested? TLDR: My ...
87
votes
16answers
32k views

How can I ask my interviewers for feedback following an interview?

Recently, I had an interview with Amazon. At first, things went smoothly and well. After two interviews, they decided not to move forward with the process. I'm the type of person who wants to ...
86
votes
7answers
16k views

How do you tell a friend they are not qualified when asked to recommend them for a job in your company?

An old colleague asked me to recommend him for a job in my company. I'm hesitant because when we worked at the same company, he didn't have the best reputation. He constantly missed deadlines, never ...
84
votes
6answers
7k views

Why is it important to gain “visibility” in the workplace?

My boss has recently been pushing me to take up stuff and try to gain visibility across the organization. I just do not understand the idea behind this. Why is it important to gain visibility? If I ...
80
votes
10answers
14k views

Is it ethical to write answers to work-relevant Stack Exchange questions on the clock? [closed]

First off, this is intended to be an extension to the question "Is it ethical to read programming books on the clock?". I do realize the irony of asking this on Stack Exchange itself, but hey, I'm not ...
78
votes
7answers
22k views

Should I tell my boss I'm leaving because of them?

I'm not sure that any good could come from this. But it seems false to pretend I'm leaving for other reasons. How should I handle this?
78
votes
6answers
51k views

Is it considered rude to turn down a job after initially accepting it?

Earlier today, I was offered a position which I accepted. It is supposed to start in about a month. I feel like I've made a huge mistake. Can I do anything about it without coming off as ...
78
votes
11answers
9k views

Why is there a stigma in corporations against revealing hourly rates and salaries? Anyone implement “transparent salaries” policy?

I always wondered about the stigma against revealing hourly rates and salaries to coworkers. I just started a company and we made a "transparent salary" policy where everyone knows exactly how much ...
77
votes
7answers
19k views

A coworker beat me to resignation. How can I resign in a professional manner?

I began work at a medium-sized startup that neglected to inform me of their impending acquisition. It is possible that it had to be kept secret due to legal reasons, but the fact of the matter is I ...
76
votes
8answers
5k views

How can I respond to an employee who objects to working on certain projects on ethical grounds?

My company does services for various clients. We recently were offered a contract to perform these services for a guy in the city who does predictions, tarot, numerology and the like for people. He ...
75
votes
7answers
7k views

How should I respond to an inappropriate question in a job interview?

In the United States, it is considered discriminatory to consider certain things about a candidate when hiring, unless that thing is actually relevant to that job. Specific to this question, a ...
75
votes
10answers
12k views

Is it appropriate to ask about a company's dress code during an interview?

Many people are dissatisfied with their company's dress code. Seeing as this can be an important factor in job satisfaction is it appropriate to ask about the dress code during an interview? If ...
75
votes
8answers
14k views

How soon should you return to work after illness?

At the moment I'm off work sick. I imagine I might be well enough to go into work tomorrow, though not fully recovered. Should you be at work whenever you're physically well enough to do so, or ...
74
votes
8answers
6k views

Does the first person to mention a number in a salary negotiation lose?

When talking about salary negotiation (or any negotiation), it's become somewhat conventional wisdom that "the first to give a number loses". Steve Hanov says so. So does Knocks.com. Is this true? ...
73
votes
10answers
11k views

How can I discourage employees from working voluntary overtime?

I run a small company (5 salaried employees). We have recently expanded from 3 to 5 staff, and while we are comfortable financially, there is not much spare money available. However there is a lot of ...
72
votes
10answers
16k views

Just got an initial job offer. How do I ask for more without any real justification?

I just got an initial programming job offer for $75k + benefits. It's an initial offer, so I feel like I should give a counter offer ($5k - $10k/year more) to avoid unnecessarily leaving any money on ...
71
votes
14answers
16k views

Is it naive to tell my current employer that I'll be leaving, months in advance?

I'm relocating to another coast in 3 months. The move isn't job related, i.e. I don't have a job out there yet, but I'm committed, e.g. I have other reasons for going, and I've signed a lease on a ...
71
votes
12answers
12k views

My manager thinks showing up early doesn't show as much enthusiasm as staying late

TL;DR: My manager says I don't "show a sense of urgency" like the rest of the team because I am laid-back and typically leave right at 5. But I come in early and work through lunch and definitely ...
67
votes
11answers
11k views

Administrator thinks I, an IT volunteer student, am hacking the school network

I'm a high school student volunteering with the school administrator, and he is somehow sure that I am always trying to hack the school server and put viruses on the computers. A group of us spent a ...
67
votes
5answers
13k views

How do I go about resigning in a company that doesn't allow two weeks' notice?

I'm in a situation where I must resign from a team that is in over their heads with a huge project. They're even currently looking to hire a couple of people to help distribute the work. What they ...
67
votes
16answers
11k views

Should I go to an interview I don't intend to accept the job (if offered)?

In a conversation with a friend, he slipped that he intended to go to an interview for a senior position in software development. I was surprised, since I was under the impression he liked his current ...
65
votes
11answers
8k views

Is it okay to leave my original documents with a company who wants them “as insurance”?

I was a temporary employee for three months, and I recently signed a one year contract with the company where I am currently employed at. Now after signing the contract, the company wants my original ...
64
votes
14answers
9k views

My colleagues frown on me for using my vacation days. Should I stop using them so much?

I work for a company that gives 25 vacation days a year. Unused days are not paid and if not used they become wasted and you cannot use them the next year. When you leave the company, you are not paid ...
63
votes
11answers
6k views

If my employer is planning a big project around me, should I tell them I'm looking for a new job?

I've been in meetings all week with my small company's owners, planning a big project for which I am a critical resource. However, meanwhile I'm looking for a job. My company has pretty low ...
63
votes
10answers
8k views

Asked “Why are you looking for a new position” Did I answer wrong?

Today during an interview I was asked why I'm looking for a new position. I gave the honest answer that I'm looking for new challenges, where I am just isn't challenging anymore. The interviewing ...
63
votes
7answers
4k views

How should I handle a meeting about my development, when I'm already set on leaving

I've worked for a very small consultancy firm for just over 2.5 years now - I've thoroughly enjoyed working here, and still do. My line manager is the Managing Director who owns the company. ...
62
votes
10answers
6k views

How can I deal with a difficult coworker?

I have a member on my team who acts like a boorish pig. He "borrows" my belongings without asking, almost as if he's entitled to it. Last time, I had some snack on my desk and he just took it to his ...
62
votes
8answers
5k views

How can we protest a deadline that is too short?

Our Project manager made a project's presentation and assigned it to our team. The amount of work was estimated at 3 weeks. Our team members discussed the project and we calculated that the amount ...
62
votes
11answers
15k views

How can an employee perform a self-appraisal without being arrogant?

Recently, everyone in my company has been required to do their annual self-appraisals for the upcoming performance reviews. And as I struggled to write my own, this got me to wondering... How can an ...
62
votes
7answers
5k views

How to politely communicate that I really can learn well only if I do it myself?

I'm a junior developer. My tech lead is a very smart person. When I go to him to seek for help on a problem, he usually finds a solution very quickly (he designed the whole system). The problem is ...
60
votes
14answers
14k views

Is there a dress code for women in software industry?

I worked in a technology company as a software development intern. At the end of the internship, my manager praised me for my technical and communication skills, however, he said I should pay more ...
60
votes
13answers
9k views

How to get my old company to stop asking for help

I left a very small startup a few months ago. Since I was the only person working as a backend developer and didn't have time to on-board a replacement, I offered to stay on part-time for contractor ...
60
votes
12answers
6k views

How do you explain to your boss they're wrong without making them feel threatened?

I work in software industry as a developer. My boss sometimes makes small mistakes when assigning tasks or reporting bugs. For example, he recently reported a bug caused by a virus on his computer to ...

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