Timeline for Coworker's criminal conviction and current behavior make me uncomfortable
Current License: CC BY-SA 3.0
14 events
| when toggle format | what | by | license | comment | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Oct 20, 2016 at 13:57 | comment | added | gazzz0x2z | That, and if the OP is skilled in IT, she sould be able to find something else easily. Ah, and predators are usually charismatic people, no wonder he's the favorite of the boss. Not even counting his criminal record, his behaviours is predatorish. | |
| Aug 3, 2015 at 13:42 | comment | added | HLGEM | Safety of the young woman comes first. She will never feel safe here and she needs to get out. Her concern is very justified. Stop defending this person. He is a convicted criminal with a history of not just one accusation but two. Any women who doesn't shy away from working with him is outright stupid. | |
| Aug 2, 2015 at 15:39 | comment | added | Andy | @sevensevens As I said, he may no longer be a suspect because the police caught the actual rapist(s). If that is the reason, that changes things quite a bit. Yes, don't be alone with him, and leave with another coworker at night, fine, reasonable. Even complain about the inappropriate and flat out weird comments. But this answer is more likely to cause issues for the asker than help, as its too close to paranoia. Remember, the person that decided to hire the guy probably knows more that the asker, and telling the employer you cannot work with him isn't going to help. | |
| Aug 2, 2015 at 15:29 | comment | added | sevensevens | @Andy - without the conviction and the rape allegations I would agree with you. The problem is the cost of being wrong is tremendous for the OP. The company may have good reason to trust him, or he may be childhood buddies with the boss. At the least, she needs to limit engagement with this person, which puts her at a disadvantage at her current job. | |
| Aug 2, 2015 at 15:07 | comment | added | Andy | @sevensevens I disagree, and btw by definition paranoia is irrational. Yes, a certain amount of caution is warranted. But I do think the benefit of the doubt should be extended, as while he is a felon he has paid his debt to society and apparently the employer (who presumably knows more about the felony) has decided he is trustworthy enough to employ. So trust your employer a bit (and if you don't, why do you work there?). And as i said, it makes a huge difference too if he was released last week vs. 20 years ago, and 20 without further incident does deserve sone benefit of the doubt. | |
| Aug 1, 2015 at 21:31 | comment | added | sevensevens | In this case, a certain level of paranoia is warranted. While we do not know he's a predator, we know he's a felon. The only way to find out if he is an actual rapist is to wait and see. As a convicted felon, his behavior needs to be completely above board, and he hasn't earned the benefit of the doubt. | |
| Aug 1, 2015 at 19:57 | comment | added | Andy | There's reasonable caution, and then there's flat out paranoia. What reason does she have to get out of the situation immediately when you yourself say we don't know he's dangerous? Be cautious, sure, but be reasonable as well. | |
| Aug 1, 2015 at 19:57 | comment | added | Andy | That's my point though, we don't know he's a predator. Being a suspect, being arrested, and being convicted are all quite different things. And we don't know if he was suspected twice, we know there are two cases, but it could be at one time he was suspected of both. We also don't know if his behavior is the reason he was suspected. It could have been that he was in the area at the times the women were assaulted, and the reason he's no longer a suspect is they caught the guy or guys that actually did it. By your logic i should never be trusted again because i was once a suspect. | |
| Aug 1, 2015 at 19:46 | comment | added | HLGEM | @andy, protecting yourself from predators is a primary responsibility. I said, we can't know he is dangerous, we know that his actions are suspicious given his prior history. and this young woman has no responsibility to protect him over herself. She doesn't need to accuse him, she needs to get out of the situation immediately. Wrongfully suspected twice should have brought about a change in his behavior if he didn't want to go through the experience again. It didn't, so his actions are suspicious and it is better for her to leave than for her to stay and find the suspicions were correct. | |
| Aug 1, 2015 at 18:50 | comment | added | Andy | @HLGEM When i was 17 i was a suspect in a burglary. Why? Well, frankly because the police were incompetent. The guy in this question may simply be awkward around women and had the misfortune of being wrongfully suspected of rape. We just don't know. As for the robbery, it is troubling, but again perhaps it was bad behavior as a kid and he has since learned the error of his way. Or maybe he was let out yesterday. Again, we don't know what the details are, and two me which scenario it is makes a huge difference. Scarlett letters should be handed out with care. | |
| Aug 1, 2015 at 18:34 | comment | added | sevensevens | Given the criminal history, you should prioritize getting off his radar. As a convicted felon, he's show he only follows the law when he wants to. Getting a talking to by HR is probably not going to slow him down. Its unfair to the OP, but she should go ahead and take herself out of this situation. | |
| Jul 31, 2015 at 17:46 | comment | added | HLGEM | I have to say what concerns me most in the story is that he has been accused of rape twice. If he was unjustly accused, one would have expected he would have learned to be more careful about the sort of harassing behavior the OP describes. And as a programmer it is probably relatively trivial for him to find her personal data. This is a very unsafe situation for any young woman to be in. No job is worth staying in this situation. | |
| Jul 31, 2015 at 16:15 | comment | added | Air | A very conservative approach but certainly the safest in this situation. I would add that, if he starts following you outside of work, your first call should not be to your boss but to the police. Talk about your concerns with friends, and document them as you feel to be appropriate. Cynical as it may sound, it's in your best interest to start laying the groundwork for a TRO in case his behavior escalates (and you can't/won't quit and move at a moment's notice). | |
| Jul 31, 2015 at 13:56 | history | answered | HLGEM | CC BY-SA 3.0 |