Timeline for Rudeness in the workpace [duplicate]
Current License: CC BY-SA 3.0
33 events
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| Apr 7, 2017 at 9:26 | comment | added | Nobody | Vote to re-open. I do not think this question is a dup. In the linked question, the OP is the only expert in a certain area in the company. In this question, the OP is a junior developer. How could we say this is a duplicate? | |
| Apr 7, 2017 at 7:31 | vote | accept | Ad Infinitum | ||
| Apr 6, 2017 at 15:16 | review | Reopen votes | |||
| Apr 7, 2017 at 12:00 | |||||
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:13 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @dirkk No, sorry, I believe of course what you and nvoigt said. I only said how I interpreted his behaviour. It is possibly a cultural issue like what you said. In my culture, it is very impolite to say something like that in a work environment. I will get used to it. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:12 | comment | added | ChrisLively | Sounds to me like the manager expected a certain level of skill that, given the number of questions you ask combined with an inability to solve issues the manager believes you should be able to solve, does not appear to be there. As this is not a good fit for you it's time to leave. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:08 | history | closed |
David K gnat paparazzo user8365 ChrisLively |
Duplicate of How much should I say in an exit interview? | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:06 | comment | added | dirkk | @AdInfinitum Again, as nvoigt, I would also say this is either harmless or I wouldn't get the behavior. You came here for advice and although it appears to not be the answer you are looking for, now multiple people here told you they do not consider it rude at all (not even borderline, to be honest). Maybe you could also ask some native co-workers of you, who also know your boss if they consider his behavior as rude. I am almost certain they don't. This is a language/culture issue and it will not be any different in your next job if you do not address the underlying issue. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:04 | answer | added | no patience | timeline score: 2 | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:02 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @dirkk No, I am not a native speaker. Under the question of nvoigt, I have given an example. He made it the same with the mouse. I may combine the physical behaviour with what he said and came to a conclusion like that. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:58 | comment | added | dirkk | @AdInfinitum Is German your mother tongue? It is for me (and also for nvoigt I would guess) and we both told you it is not very rude. I still don't see this as rude and I don't think anyone I know would consider this rude. If it is not your native language, maybe it is more a language/cultural issue than a rudeness issue? In General, German culture is quite blunt which many other cultures consider quite rude. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:55 | comment | added | Chris E | Please READ the question before deciding it's a dupe.This question may be a duplicate, but not of the question that is being cited. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:46 | comment | added | Old_Lamplighter | @AdInfinitum I had this same conversation with a young man at a previous employer. You're walking into a culture that has a certain way of doing things. You need to learn to adapt because the culture is not going to adapt to you | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:31 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @RichardU Everybody has a different personality. I am a serious man, who does not make joke or insult anybody. If somebody does not want to work with me, he can tell me politely and I would take it very professionally and leave the company with good relations but insults are not my thing. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:20 | answer | added | user45590 | timeline score: 5 | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:19 | answer | added | nvoigt♦ | timeline score: 4 | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:17 | comment | added | Old_Lamplighter | @AdInfinitum I have to agree with nvoigt. An ancient joke in IT is that the one language understood by all programmers is profanity. Snark and insult are also common. You need a tough, thick skin in this business. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:13 | review | Close votes | |||
| Apr 6, 2017 at 14:13 | |||||
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:12 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @JoeStrazzere I explained the reason in my question like that "Before me, there was another developer, who left the company because of him but he did not say anything about his behaviours and I do not want to leave like him." . I do not think that it is a waste of time if I protect the person after me. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:11 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @nvoigt I cannot understand how did all people accept the rudeness so easily. He can curse at code, system, wall but not at another person, especially a person, who tries to make his job better. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:06 | comment | added | nvoigt♦ | @AdInfinitum We cannot tell what would happen if you said "verdammt noch mal". But in terms of developer language, "verdammt noch mal" is not very rude. Developers curse all the time. Finding a boss who's not cursing will probably mean you need to find a shop where you are the only developer. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:04 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @dirkk bosses are humans too, so are we. You are right. You said "Verdammt noch mal" is not very rude. What would happen, if I say the same to him? He works for the company more than I work does not give him the right to behave the people like that. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:03 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @DavidK I editted my answer. Please review it again. It is not the duplicate of the given link. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:02 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @Erik I editted my answer, please read the paragraf before the last paragraf. It answers your question. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 13:01 | history | edited | Ad Infinitum | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
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| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:56 | comment | added | dirkk | Maybe it is just your descriptions, but from what you say here you sound overly sensitive to me. While I don't like the behavior of your boss in the two examples, please keep in mind bosses are humans too (i.e. they can be wrong). Your first example ("damn it" translates to "Verdammt noch mal", which is not very rude imho) is harmless. The second one is worse, but if it is an isolated incident I would give your boss the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he had a bad day or it was a poor attempt of humor. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:55 | comment | added | Erik | @AdInfinitum what's the point to showing him is an asshole in a polite way, if you claim he already knows he is one AND it doesn't change anything since you'll leave either way? What are you hoping to accomplish? | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:53 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @KateGregory I have read your answer. It is very helpful but I do not want to continue in this company under these circumstances and I believe I cannot change his personality. I just want to show him that he is an asshole in a polite way. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:45 | comment | added | Ad Infinitum | @Erik I think it is a universal fact that he should not talk to anybody like that. He knows his mistakes and after he says something like that he tries to make it good by making mistakes but too late. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:45 | history | edited | David K | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
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| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:44 | history | edited | Ad Infinitum | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
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| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:42 | comment | added | Kate Gregory | I think you will find good advice in this similar question: workplace.stackexchange.com/questions/59095/… | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:42 | comment | added | Erik | Have you brought this up with your chef yet? It's likely you won't be taken very seriously unless you've at least tried to resolve it with him first. | |
| Apr 6, 2017 at 12:40 | history | asked | Ad Infinitum | CC BY-SA 3.0 |