I recently joined a very large and important company (10,000 people) where I have a good friend. It is a dream job for me, since I wanted to work for this company for several years.

Since the company is very large, my friend works in a different department, but sometimes he has to deal with the people in my team (3 people, excluding my boss). After 4 weeks that I started, those 3 colleagues did not integrate me at all. I tried to talk to them, invite them for a coffee, but nothing. When they go somewhere they never invite me. Or they never talk to me. This makes things hard. Therefore I asked my friend, whenever was possible, to ask what do they think about me, and when he asked "how is the new guy?" they told him "we were a good team of 3, we did not need someone else but our boss insisted to have a 4th person without listening to us, so we will make the life of this guy hard, so that he leaves". I ignored them, but things got worse. After that they started to bad mouth about me in the department, saying I am not capable, I am very slow, that I made many mistakes, that I am very unpleasant (not true, none of them). In a meeting with 20 people, while I was presenting, they started to question my presentation, then to laugh in front of everybody about some theories, and I looked ridiculous in front of many people. Since they are in the company for 15 years, people around us started to believe them and they changed attitude towards me.

I am having hard times and I do not know what to do, or how to survive. Changing department is not possible, neither to talk to my boss and look like a spy. In another environment, a gentleman discussion (a fight) would have solved the situation, but we deal with work here. And I am 28 years old and they are 42, so we are not at the elementary school.

I do not know what to do. Any advice would be appreciated.

  • 2
    Hi, welcome to the site. Why are you not able to speak to your boss? Why would you "look like a spy"? This is usually step #1 in these situations. Also, a country tag may help provide culturally appropriate answers.
    – cheshire
    Dec 8, 2017 at 22:20
  • Regular updates with your boss should be a normal part of any work environment, not make you look like a spy. Do you really never talk to your boss?
    – Seth R
    Dec 8, 2017 at 22:29
  • Because he will talk to them and they will make up some stuff, so I will be the one paying for that at the end. What should I say? That they make my life hard?
    – Larryoktl
    Dec 8, 2017 at 22:31

2 Answers 2


You need to raise this to your manager and HR combined. This is workplace bullying and not acceptable. The employees do not run the show here and nobody is irreplaceable. You boss needs to know they are undermining his efforts to grow the team.

Sadly you are sunk here and it is not your fault. I would ask your manager when you meet with him and HR to arrange to move you until he can get his team under control.

If you get blown off, consider filing a grievance with the employment law in your area.


You should try talk to your boss before you say it can not be possible to change of department .I can say this is some kind of cold shoulder symptom in a workplace which used to happen to me before .

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