5 months ago I started a new job as a web developer which was a much desired change that was also a complete career transition for me. Even though I took a massive pay and benefits cut from my previous engineering job, I don't regret making this change at all. At first the new job was great: I was learning a lot and had great, supportive coworkers who were also fun to be around. But, since then, over the past few weeks all of my favorite coworkers have left for better jobs at other companies, including our lead web developer who was essentially my mentor. To replace him, my boss recently hired a new lead developer and unfortunately I can't stand him. I get along with most people pretty easily and can adapt to new situations well, but this particular guy is incredibly arrogant and not someone I can see myself meshing with very well over the long term.

Because he has lots of experience at other companies, within his first week at our company this new coworker wants to change everything about the way we operate and the way we code, despite having little understanding for our current systems at this point. He is not shy about telling us how "terrible" the way we do things is and how his way is better. While some of his suggestions are completely valid and I agree with them, the way he goes about making suggestions is often insulting and the way he brings them up seems to suggest that we have no idea what we're doing. The previous company I worked for was of the "we've always done it this way and therefore we don't want to change it" mindset that I couldn't stand, so that isn't my issue here at all, but I'm struggling to deal with the drastic change of all of my favorite and most helpful coworkers leaving in this time of career transition for me and how to cope with these changes while I continue to learn and grow. I know my manager is very happy with my work and I'm thankful for that but I don't know what to do for my next career move or when that should be. This new coworker is seriously throwing a wrench into my plans.

While I had initially hoped to stay at this job for at least a year, I'm now doubting how much longer I want to stay in this role. At first I was excited about this new opportunity and everything I was going to learn but now all I feel is a constantly rising anxiety level and nowhere near the happiness I felt about going to work that I felt over the past few months. Would it be best for me to start looking for a new role soon or is there something I should do to make my current role go more smoothly? Thanks for your help! I know this is a long question, so if you got this far then you are already completely awesome :)


The only time to move to another job is when someone has already made you a better offer (an offer in writing especially). In other words, don't quit your current job unless you already have another job lined up.

Five or six months is not a lot, but then again, there is no harm in you looking for another job right now. If you're asking us whether you'll be successful or not. Know that we can't give you the answer to that question. And that's also why I'm careful to say that you should keep your current job while looking for a new job.

If you can stay longer and mitigate some of the stress this co-worker is giving you, that would be the ideal solution. If you want feedback on trying to achieve this, please post another question with the exact way he makes suggestions and belittles you.

If you feel patronized, belittled, insulted, or bullied, you may be able to do something about it, whether it's confronting the co-worker directly, and/or going to your manager/HR with the issue. Plus, if he has done the same to others, you may have some allies on your side.

It's like you said. There is nothing wrong with upping your game and learning new practices, but it doesn't have to come at the expense of your dignity. Also as a new employee, the guy may be overly enthusiastic about sharing what he knows, and it may come out as a firehose of new information and as a barrage of criticisms. This is common. And sometimes, the role of management is to slow down such an employee.


Since this is your first job in this career path, it would most likely be a negative if you left sooner than a year. From a new company perspective, your current employer took a chance on you that "didn't work out" (regardless of circumstances). You could probably explain it satisfactorily in the interview, but getting to that interview would be much more difficult.

If this new employee is so disruptive and treats his supervisors as poorly as he is treating you, then he is not going to make it long regardless.

Even though you don't like him, you can still learn from him. Ask him to explain so you understand why the new way is better than the old way, but don't be disrespectful or in any way make it look like you are trying to undermine him. If he only says stuff like "because I said so", it doesn't help you learn and you are allowed to express that to him -- but if he doesn't really have an understanding of the why then pressing the issue will only make him defensive and suspicious of your motives.

Ultimately he has been placed in charge and he is allowed to make those decisions (if he only thinks he is allowed to make those decisions, he will be the one to get in trouble).

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