-1

A general background: I'm working as a test engineer at a pretty established and well known engineering company which is located in my hometown. My girlfriend, who is also an engineer is working in another company in her own hometown which is around 8 hours away from mine which is quite far.

This is my first job after graduating and have been working here for 5 months. The pay is decent, the work culture is great and I'm generally very comfortable working here. However, my girlfriend and I have been planning to move in together. The catch is that she wants to be near to her single mom is so that we can visit her during the weekends. I have no problem with this as I'm comfortable leaving home. We planned to move to the capital of my country which is around 1.5 hours from her hometown.

I planned to leave my job around December 2018. So, 1 year and a half will be the time spent working in my current company. Honestly, I am beginning to have second thoughts as I really like working here and believe it has good career opportunities. Not to mention the lower cost of living compared to the capital. My girlfriend refuse to move to my hometown as it is simply to distant from her mom so that's out of the question. I have tried convincing her many times but it was not successful.

Besides that, my manager is having the mindset that I will be staying in this company for a long time. He has been sending me for training classes and conferences, entrusting me with critical products of the company and in general grooming me to be a long term employee. I have not told him about my plans.

So my question is will this move affect my career and learning opportunities? Should I continue with the plan or should I stay longer here? I'm afraid my manager will be really disappointed if I tell him one day that I want to leave so soon but on the other hand I really want move in with my girlfriend.

closed as off-topic by gnat, Lilienthal Jan 22 '18 at 9:43

This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:

  • "Questions asking for advice on a specific choice, such as what job to take or what skills to learn, are difficult to answer objectively and are rarely useful for anyone else. Instead of asking which decision to make, try asking how to make the decision, or for more specific details about one element of the decision. (More information)" – gnat, Lilienthal
If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

0

Weighing up the pros and cons of you living with your girlfriend is off topic here - that's for you to decide (or perhaps ask on a more relevant site for this particular point, such as IPS.)

However, the reasons you have for staying that I've extracted are thus (apologies if I've missed any):

The pay is decent, the work culture is great and I'm generally very comfortable working here.

(And later on, you also say it has good career opportunities.) Sure, this is absolutely a positive point for the company. It doesn't mean you won't find this elsewhere of course, but it is a factor that may mean you want to stay.

Not to mention the lower cost of living compared to the capital

Again, this is certainly a plus in your favour - though bear in mind jobs in capital cities will generally pay more as a result of the higher cost of living, so that may well balance itself out.

My manager is having the mindset that I will be staying in this company for a long time. He has been sending me for training classes and conferences, entrusting me with critical products of the company and in general grooming me to be a long term employee.

However, this one is definitely not a reason for staying. People leave companies all the time, and it's your manager's responsibility to deal with that possibility and start searching for a replacement. Your manager might be disappointed, but he should also be understanding - and in any case, any grief that comes as a result is the company's problem not yours.

1

Well i think you already have answer in your head. If you really want to live with her then move on, get married, have kids and live happily.

on the other hand I really want move in with my girlfriend.

DO NOT BELIEVE YOUR MANAGER, ESPECIALLY YOU'RE NOT THAT IMPORTANT TO THEM.

Sorry to say that but at least you should know are you really that important to your company and your manager. You're new and is a promising tester, that's all. So if they invest you by some training, conferences, etc you will make more for them. That is how business work, do not fell sad about that.

Besides that, my manager is having the mindset that I will be staying
in this company for a long time. He has been sending me for training
classes and conferences, entrusting me with critical products of the
company and in general grooming me to be a long term employee. I have
not told him about my plans.

In my opinion, you're only fresh-man so stay there for a full 2 year. Use that time to learn and brush up your CV. Then move on. But DO NOT tell anyone about that. we can not see the future.

Hope that help

  • The answer could be improved, however staying 2 years to build CV is a good advice. – Rui F Ribeiro Jan 22 '18 at 20:29
0

Check out places to live and places to work near your girlfriend’s home. Check out how strong your relationship to the girlfriend is. Then make your decision whether to move or not.

If you decide to move, you look for a place to live and for a place to work, and then you give notice. If you don’t find anything suitable or decide to. Stay make sure you don’t tell your boss anything.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.