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Recently I was in negotiations with a company after getting an offer. During the initial call of this interview process I was given a number that I was quite happy with, so when offer time came around I assumed I'd get something close to this number, accept and be done with it. Turns out the actual offer was much lower than I expected and I was not prepared for this. The reason for the lower offer was the differential between the needs of the position and my current skill set. Nonetheless they said I showed potential.

Anyways, me and the recruiter go back and forth trying to figure something out. I was mainly trying to get back to the initial number I was teased with but no cigar. As a final resort I gave the min number it would take for me to move and they were unable to reach it. I had no leverage except for the fact that I currently have a job and salary is not that much different than whats being offered. The company would be an upgrade with respect to stature though.

After thinking over the decision I made. I regret taking an absolute, ultimatum approach during my effort to ask for more. At this point I wish I would of closed, so I have been considering emailing the recruiter and letting them know that I would be happy to take the offer if it was still open and they were still open to the idea. I understand that this is wishy washy, which is why I am here asking for advice. My basic question is: if for some reason they are okay with me going back after closing negotiations, how bad will this stain my character if I work there? Is this a terrible look? I don't really care how I'll look if they decline, but worried about the situation where they accept.

closed as primarily opinion-based by Dukeling, gnat, paparazzo, OldPadawan, Mister Positive Sep 23 '18 at 14:41

Many good questions generate some degree of opinion based on expert experience, but answers to this question will tend to be almost entirely based on opinions, rather than facts, references, or specific expertise. If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

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    There's little reason to worry about the situation where they accept. If they consider it a particularly big stain, they wouldn't hire you. – Dukeling Sep 22 '18 at 17:51
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Let me start by answering the question as asked. It's possible to change your mind, but not a sure thing. The company may have already made an offer to their second choice.

If you really want to do this immediately call the recruiter (don't email) and ask if the position is still open. If they say yes tell them you have changed your mind and you are prepared to take their last offer.

However from a psychology point of view this sounds like a classic case of buyers remorse (Or technically non-buyers remorse). What you are feeling now will probably go away in a short while. If the amount you were offered is a pay cut, or below market value be especially careful.

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Sure it's possible - there is obvioulsy no law against it.

Howeever, as I hiring manager, I would not consider you any more. Sure, you can change your mind, but maybe you change it again the next day, and again the week after? Someone who doesn't know what he wants in such an important discussion is not someone I would want to to hire. Others may think different, sure.
My recommendation would be to learn a lesson from it and move on.

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It's possible but you shouldn't.

Let me explain.

When changing your mind in this situation you need a really good reason why you are changing it.

So if you didn't want to move to another city, which you would need to do if you accepted the position, you could call them and tell them your wife/husband/ significant other has now found a great opportunity in the city so you can move together, which is why you would be interested in the position. Then you could ask whether the offer is still open.

But with money, it's more tricky. You came to the conclusion the salary is too low. What arguments would you use to explain to the company that it's not too low anymore? I can't think of any. Whatever you say it will make them feel you're not reliable.

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Not going to strike a different note. From their perspective the negotiations broke off because they could not meet your compensation requirements. This happens all the time, and isn't a big thing, because compensation is a important thing when considering a new job. So important that they'll think that if you were to accept the job now, you'll still aim for the higher salary soon, and will be unhappy if it doesn't happen. So you'll quickly leave them, resulting in an overall negative from the whole thing on their side.

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