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I work as a software developer. This is an embarassing situation. I recently made a blunder of visiting an erotic massage parlour. I had got intimate with the female therapist. However, later on I came to know that there was a hidden cam there. Also, they know my name as I paid using my credit card. I am worried if this video ends up online, can it hamper my job prospects? Can it affect me if my present or future employer comes to know about it?

closed as primarily opinion-based by gnat, bharal, Twyxz, paparazzo, Dukeling Oct 8 '18 at 16:53

Many good questions generate some degree of opinion based on expert experience, but answers to this question will tend to be almost entirely based on opinions, rather than facts, references, or specific expertise. If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

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    change your last name to Kardashian, you'll be right. Otherwise, do you ever know any of the names of any of the people in any amateur, uh, "films" that you see are? Do you honestly think you did such an amazing job that everyone will watch this video, or that the title would be anything other than "erotic massage sex"? – bharal Oct 8 '18 at 13:43
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    I wouldn't care too much for now... the chances that such a video appears in search results just by googling your name are very thin. – Laurent S. Oct 8 '18 at 13:46
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    I suppose it could, but unless you're a well-known public figure, the chances of an employer finding you on some esoteric hidden camera fetish site are pretty slim. The camera may just be there to protect the workers in case something goes wrong. – AffableAmbler Oct 8 '18 at 13:51
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    Perhaps a bigger issue here is criminal potential, Isn`t it illegal to have sex for money? You location would be better piece of information in order to compose a suggestion. Also, are you married? And are you rich enough to warrant a blackmail? – Strader Oct 8 '18 at 13:58
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    @AA AA, it seems like you're assuming that because there was a hidden camera, you were being filmed. It may well have been just a closed-circuit live feed monitored to make sure clients don't get violent or engage in other kinds of inappropriate behavior with the, uh, employees. They might not film at all; they might just monitor things in order to be ready to break in and stop you if need be. Why not ask them? – user1602 Oct 8 '18 at 18:08
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Yes

Without knowing your locality and the laws in your area, it's hard to be certain, but if you're in a developed country, and were not out and about for a bit of tourism, then it's unlikely the "establishment" is going to upload this to the internet.

Reasoning

In most of the developed world, your privacy is a valuable thing and generally violation of said privacy carries some serious repercussions. If they release the video to the internet, you have enough evidence where the video was taken (credit card statement) to get some compensation, and probably a size-able amount.

However, I did say the answer was "Yes". So here's an explanation.

In Interviews et al

I'm going to say for the sake of argument, that very very few people see this video, even fewer people will remember your face in the video. So when it comes to "new jobs" the chances of this affecting you are infinitesimal.

The worst that can happen is someone does recognise you, and they decide not to hire you. If you're looking at small businesses this could be a factor, if you're looking at large businesses, especially anywhere with a formal employment procedure, it's less likely to affect you, because the hiring manager would have to explain "why" he didn't want you, and I doubt he/she wants to admit their reasoning, and a generic "He just didn't seem right" gets less traction as businesses get bigger.

(That being said, if you work in security or similar and need to go for high level Police or Govt clearance, then someone's going to dig this out, so you might want to stay away from that sector, or any teaching role. But that's really just to avoid embarrassment/scandal)

In the workplace

If this came to light somehow, let us say someone at your workplace finds it, and notices it's you. The chances of this happening are very small, but the chance exists never the less. Depending on your type of workplace, and the ethics of your colleagues, this could get shared around. Once it makes the rounds, it's going to affect how people perceive you. Even if the person who finds it does not share it, it's going to affect that persons view of you.

If you're working in a role that has an ethics commitment, like Teaching, Security or most Charitable organisations. This is likely to make it at a minimum to HR who would assess the situation, and if it's something they have a concern about, then they will probably get a professional HR person to discuss the situation with you, and the possible outcome of that is unknown and would again depend on your geographic location, local laws etc.

So yes this 'can' affect you, but it's unlikely. If it does affect you, then you have the chance to change jobs.

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It doesn't matter if what the massage parlor did was legal or not - once something is on the internet it's there forever. I know this doesn't help you (if your name is ever attached to this video) but this is a teachable moment in that everything (repeat everything) that eventually we do can be tracked if investigated deeply enough. Would an potential employer do this and find a video? Googling your name (which is something we do before hiring) could then has the potential to cause you harm.

I would guess this was not done to release but was done as a protection for the women in the parlor.

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    this really isn't that helpful is it? it's hectoring and the OP really has no reason to worry. Do you honestly think that a brothel is going to risk its clientele base because it took the time to cross reference payments with timestamps on videos and then release the videos to some amatuer porn site... i mean, why would they even do that? They're opening themselves up for lawsuits for starters. – bharal Oct 8 '18 at 14:26
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    It's a common scam that occurs in these sort of establishments. Online, they make fake videos that makes it appear you're interacting with a real person. Eventually they come to you and blackmail you to hand over money or else they release the footage. It's a gorwing crime and one that could ruin someone's life. Best to never go into these establishments. You really can't offer advice other than don't fall in the scam and go to the police, as embarassing as it is. – Dan Oct 8 '18 at 14:48
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    Problem is, as i see it, that is it already done. And when something is out and recorded its out of your hands and can bite you in the ass years later, look at Kavanauh – Strader Oct 8 '18 at 14:49
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    @Strader Yes, it's impossible to offer any sort of advice. You can pay the person and hope they are honest and destroy the footage (likely not). It's best to never go into these places or get into such a position. At this point the best advice is not to comply and go to the police as embarassing as it is. – Dan Oct 8 '18 at 14:50
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    @Dan, agree with that. If it comes to it. from OP`s post he sees it as potential issue for now. The only advice now, can be , nothing you can do, leave it be and address it if arises – Strader Oct 8 '18 at 14:55

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