I started a new job as a software developer at a small (~50 people) company in October, and my new project manager (boss) started a month after I did. He's the outgoing, touchy-feely type; I can't read people very well and have personal space issues, so he makes me mildly uncomfortable, but I can live with it in a work context.
Since this company is rather small, everybody is friends with everybody and it's generally fairly social and fun, but I prefer to keep my work and personal lives separate.
My problem is that he seems to be trying really hard to be friends beyond work: showing me pictures of his family events, asking about my home life, messaging me outside of work hours, etc. I don't want to be friends with him, for multiple reasons.
- I think it's unprofessional and opens up all sorts of potential for ambiguity and misunderstandings.
- I tend to put foot in mouth a lot and I don't want to make awkward a situation I have to spend every workday in.
- I don't like him and I already feel uneasy around him.
Possible courses of action include:
- Indulging him despite my better judgement and see if we can be friends
- Approaching him with honesty and risk making things weird
- Being subtle about it (e.g. giving generic non-answers, changing the subject back to work, specifically not reciprocating) and hoping he gets the message
Which would make the most sense?