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Long story short I have been a Scrum Master for a team, the team are quick to criticize as opposed to acknowledge when I’ve helped them as a servant leader and have a tendency for delegating blame to the SM. A typical example would be Product owners criticizing SM not tracking their ticket when they are the owners of them.

Extremely stressed out and disappointed where I am now thinking of leaving the .org but not doing so out of loyalty.

I have tried to coach the team to be respectful but they don’t seem to care and will complain anyway.

Aside from leaving, what are my options?

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    Short answer: Bring it up to management. – Sandra K Jan 22 '19 at 18:22
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    How big is your team? Is there one person who is the "ring-leader" of the complaints, or is it spread out pretty evenly? – David K Jan 22 '19 at 18:28
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    What is the goal? A thank you? Simply a reason not to leave? A team that isn't a bunch of a-holes? – user41891 Jan 22 '19 at 19:06
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    Just the nature of the team, I have complained to senior management already but I think that this problem is their attitude since it keeps on persisting. In the past other scrum masters have left after working with them. Maybe I’m not doing something right, don’t know – bobo2000 Jan 22 '19 at 19:09
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    Is the team new to scrum and managing their own tickets? – Shadowzee Jan 22 '19 at 23:07
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Long story short I have been a Scrum Master for a team, the team are quick to criticize as opposed to acknowledge when I’ve helped

-> Did you really help them? Or do you think you help them? Did the team acknowledged the fact that you help them?

Maybe you think you have helped them - even maybe you did help them - but if they don't think it by themselves, they will never thank you.

I would suggest the following: sit down with them for one hour, and ask "It seems our work relationship is not at its best, would you mind we review some of the actions of the past few month to see what the team thinks about it? Even if it is not easy everyday, I like to work with you and know your team is talented (here you give details of TRUE things you like - don't lie as they will know it, don't over compliment) so I would like to improve our workings ways so your team and me have a better relationship and as the same time reach the company's targets."

You can also ask them what is THEIR opinion about the blocking point in their daily work: solve these blocking point (even it is not directly in your job task - you can ask somebody else for help) and you will most likely receive a thank you.

I have tried to coach the team to be respectful but they don’t seem to care and will complain anyway.

-> They are adults in a workplace, not kids. The respect will come with the overall good relation that will come with an improvement of the team's result in a working ways that the team members can accept.

Once you get some result that the team knowledge by themselves, the relationship should be less tense and you should have less stress. Maybe in one year from know you will happy to see this team at work.

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    Small suggestion, use quotes > instead of preformatted blocks when quoting. Helps with screen readers and such. – rath Jan 23 '19 at 10:01
  • This answer seems spot on. Servant leaders help where they are asked. If you are helping and they don't appreciate it, the help may be useful and even needed, but it isn't servant leadership. – Daniel Jan 23 '19 at 11:50
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You can't control how other people will act so you will have to focus on the options that you do have.

Discuss with management on a case by case basis whose responsibility the conflict falls under and that way, you can cite management if the product owners complain about it.

Alternatively, if you are constantly stressed out and disappointed, it may also be an option to change teams, roles (or organizations).

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