For context I'm an MtF hiring manager at a very small startup. I'm pretty open about being trans to people who know me well but wouldn't feel comfortable stating on our company's website that I'm trans.

In my experience, most people's assumptions seem to be that no one is trans. Upon finding out, it does make some people uncomfortable, though, so if it is a dealbreaker for a new hire, I would rather deal with it sooner rather than later. Is the best time to mention this during the interview or later once an offer is extended? Is it better to bring it up casually or sit down and have a serious talk about it?

Most other questions have focused on a trans person joining a company, but I think the difference here is that I want to figure out how, as a manager, to make my company a great environment for everyone.

  • 27
    Are they really entitled to know? Sure, I respect that you are open about it and am not suggesting you should hide it, but is it your responsibility to reveal it unsolicited? Or is your goal to weed out openly transphobic employees?
    – Summer
    Aug 1, 2019 at 14:55
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    Reminds me of an old story where X was walking in the park, and then hears yelling from dark behind trees: "Hey You! Yes You! Don't look here I am changing my clothes". but X did not notice or look except when they heard the yelling..
    – Sandra K
    Aug 1, 2019 at 16:36
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    Just to clarify, do you currently present as female or are you transitioning? If the former, then what business is it of theirs what your former name or appearance were? Of course, no need to hide or be ashamed.
    – Damila
    Aug 1, 2019 at 16:45
  • 2
    Possible duplicate of Is it reasonable to ask how the company is to trans folks?
    – DarkCygnus
    Aug 1, 2019 at 17:26
  • 5
    Given that we already have at least 3 other posts about this question, it would seem to me that this is indeed quite answerable, and not opinion based or too broad at all...
    – DarkCygnus
    Aug 1, 2019 at 17:28

5 Answers 5


Your gender and you sexuality is your agency, and it's understandable that you want to get it out in the open. However, you also have to be pragmatic, a fact I'm sure you're all too aware. In addition, in the interview, you are representing the company.

If I was interviewing and the interviewer started discussing their own gender or sexuality, I would find that inappropriate.

If you feel inclined, you could discuss how it's a very inclusive workplace, and it supports members of the lgbtqi community.

  • 21
    I wonder if it would be beneficial to mention this in the vacancies. putting something like "lgbtq+ friendly" up front the first time they see your companies job offers would at least show what the opinion or mindset of the company is on the matter. Thus giving people who are uncomfortable with this the chance to not pursue the job offer, and saves the OP the work of having to talk to these people, or throw private information on the company site.
    – skippy
    Aug 1, 2019 at 15:30
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    It's probably also worth noting that as a hiring manager you may wish to review company policies about dos and don'ts of conducting interviews.
    – dbeer
    Aug 1, 2019 at 15:45
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    @BobMeijer, I would expect that to be covered by the common phrase in most job posting "We are an equal opportunity employer". Should they indicate that they are friendly with other identities (racial, religious, ethnic, etc.) that could potentially make some candidates uncomfortable as well? That could become unwieldy.
    – Seth R
    Aug 1, 2019 at 16:23
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    +1 for mentioning that the workplace is supportive of lgbtqi. That will give new hires the heads-up that this is an environment that they might not be comfortable in if this offends them. IMO that's enough for them to make a decision on. Anything more specific or personal and they might begin to wonder what expectations you may have. Aug 1, 2019 at 18:22
  • 2
    I agree that it shouldn't be a major talking point, but I think it can still be mentioned in an interview. For example, "As a trans-woman I've found the company's commitment to diversity..." or whatever point you want to make.
    – David K
    Aug 1, 2019 at 19:06

Just do the interviews as normal and forget about this aspect of it.

It's not that important and people are getting more enlightened and accepting these days.

You making a deal of this is likely to cause more confusion and uncertainty than just carrying on with normal business practices.

You're the hiring manager, and that's all that really matters here.

  • 3
    Good answer - you might want to note that as a hiring manager OP may want to consult company policies when deciding what is appropriate to cover in an interview.
    – dbeer
    Aug 1, 2019 at 15:44

I understand the perspective that you want to be proud of who you are and I think you can work it into the conversation if you chose to. Since you are openly transgender, I think that will come naturally. Some of us have the "privilege" or "burden" of being able to hide our diversity and choosing to reveal it is just amazing to help the community at large understand.

But I think it's important to talk about other groups too if your company has resources for them. For instance, I always make it a point when I talk to candidates about our companies employee affinity groups and benefits including (infertility and gender reassignment surgery) even if it doesn't apply to them. The point is that we have a lot of different kind of people that work here to the point we have affinity groups and benefits. It's signaling to the candidate "If you don't want to work in this kind of diverse environment, this is your chance to opt out, but we're committed to diversity and inclusion."


IMHO, why should that become a dedicated topic of conversation.

Your gender identification is your personal thing and you have nothing to justify or apologize for.

Naturally, as part of the conversation - sure, otherwise why?


As a candidate, were the interviewer to start talking about their sex life I'd end the interview then and there, irrespective of whether they're homosexual, transgender, straight, or whatever.

It's got no place in a job interview, or indeed in the workplace as a whole.

If you end up relating socially with your coworkers, outside of company settings (so not the open bar hour after a company meeting or during a company organised trip to a theme park for example), THAT might be an appropriate moment. But even then, only if it's actually relevant to the conversation and situation.

Now if someone were to ask you why you look like a woman but have a rather deep voice (for example), you might want to mention it, but that's as far as it should go.

  • 5
    Gender identity is a bit different to "sex life". Maybe you could clarify your answer? Aug 2, 2019 at 4:56
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    @GregoryCurrie Correct. Being homosexual or heterosexual is more about what gender your significant other is than it is about what you do with them in your bedroom; and being transgender is about identifying with a different gender than the one your biological appearance would suggest. Reducing all this to mere "sex life" is actually pretty insulting.
    – Niko1978
    Aug 2, 2019 at 6:45
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    "or indeed in the workplace as a whole"? Really? No one is allowed to mention they are married, or have children, or their partner is the same sex as themselves? Ever? There is a difference between "sex" as "what people are ACTUALLY doing in bed" and the things which can indicate ones sexual orientation, or possibly even their history as a different gender. But "or indeed in the workplace as a whole" is just plain wrong. Aug 3, 2019 at 0:07

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