I am very sensitive to how other people are doing in the office. In the past, I have helped people having a bad day, listened to their wild and fantastic and angry stories about coworkers and management etc. (not by request, they always initiate). I don't insert judgement (as best possible ;) ) and I try to say "Well" and "I see" and "How do you feel about that" rather than "Darryl! That's absurd and rude!"... I HATE judgemental people... we hurt each other every day.

I listen, I care. It's extremely important in an office whether it be very professional or completely unprofessional environment.

Kyla: Sharon is such an awful awful person. I hate her. She's always telling people I'm terrible. Me: How long has this been going on? Have you talked to HR? That's terrible news. Ya know I've felt that way so many times and what I did was.... Maybe it will pass, come on over an talk to me if you need to... etc.

I know very well how to TRY to help too because after all, I've made so many unbelievable gaffes myself.

What is that skill called?

I feel like its extremely valuable and I want to wave it around so that the hiring manager knows something important about me AND we can also quickly find out how much THEY care before I waste time with an interview ;)

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    What do you mean by: "we can also quickly find out how much THEY care before I waste time with an interview ;)" ? Is it that you want to assess your fit as an 'empathic' (to use the word from one of the answers) person into their company culture? Do you want to work with other people who have the same trait? Or something else? I'm trying to get to your motivation in asking this, as the value of this skill is highly dependent on role/culture/etc in my experience. – seventyeightist Oct 17 at 19:38
  • @Kilisi I seriously disagree with this having anything to do with an agonized aunt or a nosey parker. First point is I'm here to help... it's not overly emotional, its supportive. Second point, being available and friendly has nothing to do with prying for information.. So I don't know who you've met but it ain't me ;) – chrips Oct 17 at 20:00
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    @seventyeightist If I come in for an interview and they seem cold... I'm not interested in working for someone like that. Empathic yes. I do not need to work with others like this is I'm offering my skill to those who need it -inline- as I'm open and easy to talk to. You're right it is highly dependent on the role and culture! – chrips Oct 17 at 20:02
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    @Kilisi an agony aunt is just a nosey parker who has been legitimately invited in by virtue of the asking of advice! – seventyeightist Oct 17 at 20:14
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    @Kilisi Daaanggg.... I don't think thats appropriate. – chrips Oct 18 at 0:10

Any and/or all of the following apply

  • Teambuilding
  • Conflict resolution
  • Mentoring
  • Soft skills
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    I upvoted your answer as I think all of these are good words to describe the kind of interpersonal interactions that the OP is referring to. But actually I'm not sure if "listening" ('I see', 'how do you feel about that' etc) and "sharing my own experiences" ('I felt that way and I did XYZ') etc are really team building or conflict resolution skills. Mentoring in my mind covers a specific set of tasks/behaviours involving working with someone to help define what they want to achieve, what they see as impeding their progress and working with them about that, etc. ... – seventyeightist Oct 17 at 19:43
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    ... mentoring: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Workplace_mentoring (It was slightly too long to fit into one comment, grr!) – seventyeightist Oct 17 at 19:46
  • @seventyeightist well, I'm assuming that the OP's skills go a bit further than described. – Richard Says Reinstate Monica Oct 17 at 19:47
  • fair enough. My assumption was the "TL;DR" of OPs skills is the stated: "I am very sensitive to how other people are doing in the office [...] I listen, I care." I assumed, maybe wrongly (perhaps OP can help us out?) that the "listening and providing suggestions to help" is the trait being described, rather than other things that build on that. – seventyeightist Oct 17 at 19:52
  • Via previous-to-this-answer-comments, I get the impression that many people think that this is just a hokey or cheesy thing to even attempt offering a company. But this answer was right on the money. I do like "Team Builder" and "Mentoring" very much and will attempt to get that stuck in hirer's mind. – chrips Oct 17 at 20:07

What is that skill called?

Based on your description, I would describe that skill or attribute as empathic.

From Oxford's:

The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

Empathetic people have a tendency to put themselves into "other's shoes", meaning they can perceive and understand well the feelings and postures others have. This is a valuable skill in some careers and jobs.

In a way, this is also a bit related to "being a team player", something that is also valuable in a candidate, as you are caring and helping your coworkers.

  • Team player...darn. My perception is that that is a very limited way to think about it. Maybe I can't say this to people... maybe it just comes out during employment... ? I was told however that putting "Team Player" on your Resume is just useless. I think I'm going to go with something along the lines of Mentor and Team Builder. – chrips Oct 17 at 20:04
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    *sighs... You missed the part where I said "a bit related". My suggestion was the word empathy as a way to phrase it. Furthermore, OP hasn't said if this is going to be out on the resume, and is actually asking for ways to phrase this – DarkCygnus Oct 17 at 20:11
  • Oh that's my bad. Yes I mean to put this on the Resume. Sorry about that. – chrips Oct 17 at 21:29
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    Then I'll go, as suggested, with empathic, is the best word I can think of now. (sorry, didn't noticed you were OP on my last message, was mobile editing :) – DarkCygnus Oct 17 at 21:34

Training classes for this skill often call it "active listening."

You are right, it's a valuable skill and rare talent. Cultivate it in yourself. (Maybe find one of those training classes?)

And be careful to avoid "triangulation," which is a ten dollar word for "getting caught in the middle."

  • Amazing advice! I'm going to look that up! Maybe there's even a course online too – chrips Oct 18 at 15:50

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