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I started an ER registration job about 3 months ago, and there are two coworkers responsible for my training who are going through some teenager level of drama.

Apparently, since I am friendly with both of them that is a problem. I am not interested in their issues, but one of the parties decided that I am out to get her now because of a mistake I made in my training. I kindly explained to her that I have too much going on in my own life to be wrapped up in her drama with the other coworker or participate in the petty behavior she was accusing me of.

I want to quit, I want to quit tonight. I am in nursing school, marriage on the rocks, parents getting divorced, mental health in the toilet, and I already have a second job.

How should I handle this:

I want to quit, I have another job and I'm nervous about quitting without notice. Should I tell my manager about the hostile work environment when resigning?

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  • 2
    Which part do you want to handle?
    – Kilisi
    Oct 27, 2019 at 4:25
  • 1
    I want to quit, I have another job and Im nervous about quitting without notice. Should I tell my manager about the hostile work environment when resigning?
    – Abigail
    Oct 27, 2019 at 4:26
  • 1
    Not everyone who posts in English has English as their first language Oct 27, 2019 at 12:01

4 Answers 4

19

Well, if you're prepared to quit, then you really don't have anything to lose.

However, it's not a good practice to quit over a situation you never informed your manager of, and never gave them a chance to address.

You should inform your manager of the situation immediately, and especially how it's affected you to the point that you want to quit immediately.

From a manager's point-of-view: They've already invested a lot in your training. To lose you now is pretty much a defeat for them, so if they're competent at all, they'll at least try to fix it.

Give your manager a chance, first. Tell them what's happening and see if it gets fixed.

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  • 1
    Yes. Make this the Managers problem to deal with, not yours.
    – Time4Tea
    Oct 28, 2019 at 23:21
  • "However, it's not a good practice to quit over a situation you never informed your manager of, and never gave them a chance to address." Why?
    – user70848
    Oct 28, 2019 at 23:21
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    @user70848 - If you don't address it calmly and professionally with the manager, then the situation can very well be misconstrued as you just being hotheaded and irrational, and not only does the "problem" never get solved, but you're not going to get a good reference in the future. Oct 29, 2019 at 18:14
  • If you're quitting, does it matter if the problem never gets solved? What difference does that make to the person quitting? Also what if the reason you're quitting is your manager?
    – user70848
    Oct 29, 2019 at 19:31
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If you have another job to move into where you feel the working environment will be more calm and supportive, then just hand your notice in and leave.

If asked, just say that the new job is a better fit for your future plans and leave it at that. You don’t have to declare the actual reason for leaving.

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It sounds like your manager is not one of these two. So tell him/her what is going on right now. Hopefully, he can solve the problem. If he can, than you have nothing more to worry about. If he cant, then if you choose to leave, then he will be more understanding of the situation and less likely to give you a negative recommendation.

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So from your post this is what is going on in your life:

  1. Marriage on the rocks
  2. Nursing school
  3. Two jobs
  4. Mental health issues
  5. Parents getting a divorce . ....

    1. Coworker drama

I've numbered them like that on purpose. While you did not go into detail, anyone with issues 1-3 are bound to have some level of mental health issues. That is no surprise there. Now #4 may be more serious than I am giving credit for here, and if you have a desire to hurt yourself or someone else you need help with that. Please seek it. However, #4 may clear up if 1 through 3 are not issues.

Along those lines the coworker drama would likely be very easy to deal with if you did not have the other things going on in your life. Nursing school will end and once it does, it may clear up the need to work a second job. That will greatly reduce the stress in your life.

The marriage stress in both you and your parent's marriage will eventually work itself out. It may not seem like it now, but it will.

The key is that you need to reduce the stress surrounding issues 1 through 5. Solving the coworker issue, will not greatly reduce your stress. If you have a caring boss, I will tell her about 1-3 and 5 and ask them for suggestions. An alternative might be to talk to an older nurse where you work. Nurses are a caring lot and can provide good advice on the challenges you are facing. They might have gone through similar things themselves.

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