Are there any well known professional, or frictionless ways to communicate this?

i.e. my intentions are clear. I would like to quit but I would stay if they pay me more. So obviously I could just quit but actually if they'd pay me more I would stay.

But I cannot find any convenient way to communicate this.

One could approach it as "ask for a salary rise, if they do not do it then quit" But I am more on the other side already, like I do not need to ask for the salary rise, have all that friction, then get a negative response, then approach to quit.

I am more on the side of: I quit immediately unless they increase my salary. And I'd rather communicate more in that direction than in the direction "I just want more salary".

Any ideas on how to communicate this?

  • 1
    What leverage do you have apart from threatening to quit? Because handing an ultimatum out of nowhere with a threat of immediate quitting isn't professional.
    – Kilisi
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 4:33
  • 1
    No, it is a different situation. I do not feel strictly speaking underpaid. I just wanna leave or either I would stay if they pay me more.
    – Worker
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 5:16
  • 3
    If you're not feeling underpaid, what makes you think that more money will make you happy in a job you want to leave?
    – Erik
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 8:10
  • If an employee came to me with the intention of leaving, I might try to buy me some time by giving them whatever is needed to have them stay (assuming I really need them) but certainly would start looking for a replacement right away. "Pay me more or I leave" is hardly ever turning into any good for both parties...
    – Laurent S.
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 10:09
  • 1
    That's why my question
    – Worker
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 10:17

1 Answer 1


You really have to find a new job before you do this. Otherwise, it's quite weak... you have no real power in the negotiation. Without that pending offer, you can't really walk away, unless you want to outright quit to no job at all. That's a VERY bad idea; unless you want to bring a lot of financial pressure and stress down on yourself.

With an offer in hand, you can calmly, professionally, and politely ask to speak with him privately, and ask for more money. That's about as close to "frictionless" as you'll get. If he says no, then you can counter by saying that you have another offer. That puts it back in his court. If he maintains his no, then politely give two weeks notice.

You'll also be far, far more confident and firmer in your ask. He'll know you're serious. Unless you are a champion poker player, without a pending offer, you'll come across softer; he'll pick up on it, and know that he can refuse.

I would also have a list of reasons why you deserve more compensation.

In my opinion, all negotiations have an inherent "friction." It's just part of the game. There is a tension between the bid/ask price, regardless if it's a car, home, shares of TSLA(bid/ask spread), an old lamp at a garage sale, or a salary increase. Accept this, dig deep, and hold your ground. You're worth it.

  • 1
    How do you know I do not have another job?
    – Worker
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 5:17
  • 10
    @Worker you'd get more helpful answers if you put more details in the question. Answerers aren't psychic and will do their best with the information they have.
    – jcm
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 9:25
  • 1
    It's probably worth mentioning that even "winning" the negotiation will probably have a negative impact on OP's future relationship with employer.
    – Laurent S.
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 10:19
  • 2
    "You have no power in the negotiation." While this may be accurate for most cases, many financially independent individuals can likely quit their job on the spot without any real financial strain.
    – azthec
    Commented Jan 26, 2021 at 11:36
  • 1
    @kmiklas Totally agree. I loved my job. Still do in fact. By the time I walked out hoping for a counteroffer, it was less about the money itself and more about the lack of respect, appreciation, and progression that the lack of money implied.
    – Kaz
    Commented Jan 27, 2021 at 14:33

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