Is it Advisable to ask my manager for a Reference letter and inform him i'll be looking for a new job

Question

So some incidents today and over the last few weeks have pushed me to the point where I just simply cant work here anymore.

And i'm curious if its okay for me to tell. my manager that I'm going to be searching for a new job and i'd appreciate a reference letter or being able to put him down as reference.

We have no HR, And The CEO is constantly swearing at me in my face and I just have to sit still and smile and take it, And i'm kind of done. Wether he means it as a joke or not is beyond in appropriate in my opinion.

Small bit of context here is that, Ive been working on a personal application for him, I work on it when I have free time I also have other clients that I work with, And do work for them, As its a personal project I sideline it, When more important work comes in today he asked me if im done, and I said that its been sidelined as im busy with a Big eCommerce system for a client, Then standing directly at me looking e in the eyes he calls me what I guess in english would be a Cu** .

This is also far from the first occasion.

Now He jokes around at times But quite frankly I dont think its okay, For the CEO of a company to behave this way.

Answer 1

Don't tell your manager or CEO right away that you want to leave!

The reason for not informing your superiors immediately is that they might make your life at work even more miserable than it already is, and that can include various and multiple reprisals.

I would suggest you should do the following things immediately in that order to get out of your current workplace asap:

1. Brush-up your CV

2. Start looking for a job (make sure you do this with your personal equipment and not during work-hours so your current employer doesn't find out)

3. Take some PTO and conduct some interviews with companies that interest you and that are willing to employ you.

4. Once you landed a job and also have a formal contract in your hands, you should inform your manager and make sure you arrange departure and on-boarding with the new company according to your notice period stated in your current contract.

5. While in your notice period you might want to ask your manager for a reference in case he still on good terms with you.

6. Gracefully serve your notice-period, hand-over work related equipment, information and docs, maybe train your successor if applicable. Try to do that as professional as possible (There are many really good Q&A's here on TWP on serving your notice period that provide solid advice on that topic)

7. Have a cold margarita and enjoy being out of that hell-hole (Optional)

Answer 2

No.

If you're going to leave, find a new job, get an actual formal offer in writing, and only then tell your current employer you're even thinking of leaving. In almost all circumstances, you don't need a reference to get a job any more, so there's no need to ask your manager if they'll give you one, and there's just nothing to be gained by letting your employer know.

(Aside on references: an employer might check that you're not lying about your previous work experience, but those questions don't go beyond "Did Someguy work with you from October 2019 to March 2021, and did he leave in good circumstances?")