Manager wants me to attend a virtual medical appointment at work

Question

I have a telehealth appointment coming up and asked to take the time off work needed to go home for the appointment and then return. This usually isn't an issue with my manager but for some reason he has deflected my asking for the partial sick day/pto and has insisted I attend my appointment in his office since he plans to be out during that time anyways.

Attending such a personal meeting at work already makes me uncomfortable but to make it worse, I know for a fact that you can hear whatever is said in there from the office next door even if the doors are closed. In addition, his recent change in attitude makes me suspicious and feel like he could be recording what is said during my appointment.

I've already told him that I don't want to do that and want to go home for my appointment but he is still deflecting. Do I have enough to make a case with our HR department or is there something else I should do to try and resolve this issue?

If it matters, I'm in the USA.

Some additional details based on comments:

1. I scheduled this about a month in advance when only 5 days is required here.
2. I'm transgender but haven't told them so I doubt they know and are being transphobic.
3. I can't attend from my phone primarily because I have no signal and don't have anywhere private to call from. A car is not private when the appointment may involve taking off clothing for any reason.
4. I'm already looking for another job and may have something lined up that I can leave in a few weeks.
5. I live really close to work.
6. I wouldn't attend a private medical appointment anywhere except my own home or a medical facility.
7. I have had an issue recently were I fainted/passed out and was out sick for 3 days but made it clear that this appointment was unrelated and had been scheduled before I had this issue. I told them it was primarily for a private matter (my HRT/transition; didn't specify to them) but we may discuss the recent issue at the end. The current thought is it was stress related (more reason for me to leave this job).

Answer 1

If you feel your manager is not listening to you, then HR or your manager's boss are your best options. You've earned the PTO, so it's up to you when you take it. Some companies may have policies about timing and requirements for requesting early, but in the end it is your PTO and you can use it how and when you choose.

As an alternative, take the entire day. If your manager isn't cool with the half day, then take the full day. In the future, don't tell your manager why you're taking PTO. Leave it at "I've got some personal stuff to take care of."

Answer 2

I generally tend towards being pretty paranoid about work privacy and health issues, but since no one else has suggested this yet, is it possible that your manager thinks he is genuinely doing you a favor? He may think that he's being kind and saving you PTO, without realizing your privacy concerns or that his office isn't very soundproof. And his insistence may be just a cultural thing, like with gift-giving where the recipient is expected to refuse symbolically and the giver is expected to keep insisting until they accept.

If this is the case (as opposed to your manager having malicious intent) you can just tell him that his office isn't soundproof and you are uncomfortable about the privacy and charging the company for personal business. If you believe I'm just being optimistic, then Joel's answer is correct.

Answer 3

Send an email:

Hello $boss.

I really appreciate your offer to use your office for my telehealth appointment on $date. However, a doctor's appointment means I might have to take my clothes off for diagnosis and I really don't feel comfortable doing that in any office in our company. I'm sure it's against some regulation and HR would probably have a heart attack just thinking about it.

So I will be out of the office on $date between $starttime and $endtime.

If your boss really is weird enough to continue to insist on this, forward the email and your bosses response to HR.

Answer 4

First call your doctor's office and ask if they'd be ok with it

Your doctor's office may be really paranoid about patient privacy and may refuse your appointment if taken in your workplace. It's worth checking with them first. If they say it's a "no go", you have ammunition with your employer. If on the other hand they give it a green-light, don't mention this to your boss--fall back on your own personal hesitation, which is fully valid. I for one would not be ok with this kind of thing.

I say this because doctors offices I've worked with seem pretty paranoid about telehealth from a policy standpoint (particularly with regard to their own HIPAA compliance as a healthcare provider) and so they may well say "no way!" to this idea, again giving you some pretty big ammunition with your boss.

Note: don't tell your boss you're going to do this. Just do it.

Also I'd check laws in your area

IANAL but it sounds like your employer may be doing something illegal by trying to force you to take a doctors appointment onsite. Maybe. Again, IANAL...

Note that this approach could backfire

Only use this approach if you don't feel comfortable (or can't afford to) take the more direct approach of saying "I don't feel comfortable with that" and not backing down no matter what. Personally I prefer a direct approach when I can, as giving reasons can give the other person leverage for argumentation. But if you can't or don't want to draw a line in the sand with your boss, this approach may provide you cover, assuming your boss takes the doctor's word as final.

Answer 5

To me, it seems like he thinks (actually fears) you have job interview at another company, that's why he brings you in this awkward situation. While I don't necessarily think he would be spying on you, neither listening at the door, nor recording, he knows that nobody would like to have a job interview in the current bosses office and a doctor's appointment is the usual excuse for job interviews. Since your reaction was rather strong in refusing the offer, he feels his point proven, you "failed" the test.

You were talking about "recent change in attitude", so I feel he might be afraid of losing a valuable employee without replacement. What led to this change in attitude, has there been a specific situation, e.g. an important coworker leaving, you voicing general concerns about your tasks/position or any other situation that could imply things are not going great? Is there anything that could lead him to these kind of thoughts and how irreplaceable are you to the department/company?

Stress that it's a health-related issue, while not going into details and also voice your concerns regarding privacy and discussing medical issues in the office. Hopefully it's just a misunderstanding that does not require escalation, but if not - the other answers have a lot of good approaches including HR or the managers' boss.