Due to changes I've had no control over our team was dissolved after ~half of a year of slow agony.(several managers, more and more understaffed, hiring freeze etc.) Now I find myself in a company that needs programmers so they don't want to let me go in a position that I didn't sign up for. The previous position was good and first ~three quarters were a blast. Then we slowly started slipping into a quagmire that chipped at our team and now there is only me left.
In the meantime I got myself some real life responsibilities(family etc.) so I can't just snap my fingers and leave. Well I likely can but it is not as easy as it would be a year ago.

The unfortunate thing is that I'm not a particularly good fit for the position I increasingly find myself in and I'm slowly sinking into apathy. (maybe I'm even quite deep in it. as of late I've been increasingly resigned which isn't good neither for me nor for the company.)

There are several possibilities that come to my mind, none of which are particularly appealing:

  • I can always leave. Although due to the responsibilities I currently have it is bit harder to do than usual.
  • There are some internal transfers possible, unfortunately none of them seem that much better than my current situation.
  • Just sticking it out - which I guess is what I'm currently doing and its slowly killing me.

Is there something I missed in the broad strokes that I've painted please?
If the information I've provided is not sufficient, I can do a full rant and go into a profession-specific detail however in the end I've opted for a shorter version.

  • 2
    What do you want? As opposed to not want.
    – mxyzplk
    Jul 13, 2022 at 13:17
  • Doing something physical, teaching, or setting up a small workshop/game studio. Basically anything with tangible results that are not only numbers on a spreadsheet. It likely is good that we increase our efficiency by few % as it means we can protect more people. Unfortunately I can't feel it the way I can feel it when a student of mine completes a next level of his game. However there is the issue of keeping my family fed...
    – Shamis
    Jul 13, 2022 at 13:30
  • 1
    would a similar job at a different company solve at least some of the issues? especially considering that you liked the job at first, before things fell apart?
    – Esther
    Jul 13, 2022 at 14:42
  • One of the three options sounds like a good idea Jul 13, 2022 at 15:06
  • 1
    You've pretty much outlined your options. The normal action is: 1) look for a better job; 2) When you find one take it; 3) until then stick it out Jul 13, 2022 at 16:29

2 Answers 2


Although due to the responsibilities I currently have it is bit harder to do than usual.

You can leave whenever you want, it's just a matter of lining up a new job first. This isn't any more difficult than before.

Your problem (no offence intended) is allowing your apathy to spill over into your personal life and overall morale.


If I understand you correctly, your main responsibility is your family.

If your job makes you miserable, find a new one. A miserable father (I assume that is the role you have in your family, but this applies to all other roles as well) will make things worse for everyone.

As a programmer you should have no hard time finding a new job. So just find one that suits you better, quit your old job and start the new one.

Once you have decided to quit your job and started your search, the agony of your current job will become a bit less, as from that moment on it will feel like a temporary thing (which it will be). At least that was the case for me when I was in a similar situation.

Good luck and all the best.

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