I work in a multicultural environment and I know for sure to order vegetarian if we have lunch. But I also will not even discuss having eaten non-vegetarian food. Is this a new norm or am I imagining the pressure that I feel?
Do you like vegetarian food? If yes, order vegetarian food. Do you feel bad about the suffering of animals? If you feel bad enough, order vegetarian food. Are you allergic to protein? If yes, order vegetarian food. Is vegetarian food cheaper and you csnt afford non-vegetarian food? Order vegetarian food. Are you afraid that your peers will shun you if you order non-vegetarian food? In that case, it’s none of their business what you eat, so order what you like.
I’d probably make an exception and avoid eating pork in front of people having a problem for religious reason. Because there are plenty of alternatives to eat.
But firstly, another person told me that while the vegetarian said she did not mind, she really did.
It doesn't matter how she felt.
In life, there will always be people who don't like what you do. And there will always be people who try to influence how you behave.
If you live and work in the United States (and from your other question, it does sound like you're in the US) you need to learn to be more assertive and stop caring about what others think of you.
By trying to control what others think of you, you are letting those other people control you. In other words, you're teaching others to treat you like a child, not an adult.
Also, I want you to notice the second question you asked about the private office a contractor claimed as his own. That second question stems from the same place this question comes from. You're a rule follower. You have a strong sense of fairness. You care too much about what others think of you. You put the wants of others above your own wants. You're a "nice" person.
But ultimately, this kind of personality won't serve you well in the United States. Over time, you'll grow resentful, bitter, and angry.
You are imagining it. Grow a Pair, order a steak and talk about how you feel the primal calling to chase down your food on foot, dispatch it with your bare hands and feed upon it's still warm flesh.
Okay, I'm partly saying this is jest, but partly not.
It's fine to have moral opinion on issue, it's fine to personally eschew from issue because of moral opinion, the moment you explicitly or implicitly try to compel compliance with moral opinion on issue is where tolerance and acceptance breaks.
This should be the standard of behavior on a myriad of contentious topics - you do you, and I'll leave you to it, so long as you allow me to do me - we'll get along like a house on fire.
If you are feeling compelled to comply with someone else's Moral code, that you don't share, then you need to stand up for yourself and assert your right to hold a different view. If you start experiencing discrimination or stigmatization for this, then either file an HR complaint, or look for a new employer.