I have two job offers. One is a dream job but there is 1 hour commute (one way) for 3 days. The other job is remote but not at all comparable with the first job offer.

Should I mention to the employer (with the dream job) that I have a remote job offer but I like this profile and company and if you reduce the commute to one day a week, I am more willing to join your company and leave the other remote job offer. Is it the correct way or should I say something else?


4 Answers 4


Is it the correct way

No. Don't mention the remote offer. That can come across as a threat or blackmail and no one likes that.

or should I say something else?

Start with making up your own mind: is the commute a show stopper or not. This will determine your negotiation tactics. Assuming it's, not a show stopper you can ask politely. "I'm super excited about the position but I'm a bit worried about the commute. Do you have some flexibility around this ? "

Another option here is to start the job and wait a bit until you understand the lay of the land. At this point you know what type of work benefits from being in office and which can be done equally or better remotely and you'll know how hard-nosed the company is about office attendance.


It sounds like a pretty straightforward situation.

One hour each way is a long commute, and factoring time and travel costs means you'd often want tens of thousands more for a non-remote role, and that's before you consider the effect of tiredness and loss of leisure time.

Even if the pay difference is sufficient to justify the non-fully-remote role, it can't hurt to explore whether the 3 days is mandatory whilst mentioning a fully-remote alternative offer. The worst they can say is no.

  • 6
    In plenty of places an hour is a normal commute. Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 12:35
  • 1
    @DJClayworth, it's certainly not unheard of (and more). I've done it myself, but 30 minutes in my view is the limit of what is leisurely, and 60 minutes justifiably a "long" commute.
    – Steve
    Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 12:47
  • 2
    I wouldn't consider a 1-hour commute unless by public transit of a sort that let me fairly comfortably work or read en route. But there are certainly folks who do it, usually because living closer is prohibitively expensive or because their spouse needs a shorter commute or something of that sort. I knew one guy who did it because it was the only way he could both have the specific job he wanted and afford an barn to house his pinball machine collection. De gustibus...
    – keshlam
    Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 16:33

The more I think about this, the more I think you are asking the wrong question.

The standard answer to a long commute is not telecommuting. It's relocation. If this is really a dream job, or even a very good job, management would expect you to find someplace to live that's acceptably close to the office.

They are much more likely to be receptive to a request for a relocation allowance than a request to telecommute, unless they explicitly said earlier in the process that they're ok with you working remote.

You'd relocate if the job was eight hours away. You can do so to shorten a daily commute.

  • 4
    I think relocation is largely something from a bygone era now - like tied housing. Jobs simply don't last long enough, and any wider geographic differentials in salary are often matched by differentials in living and housing costs.
    – Steve
    Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 18:15
  • It's still going to be the employer's first question. If you aren't willing to inconvenience yourself, even at our expense, how serious are you?
    – keshlam
    Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 20:25
  • 3
    It may be a national difference. In the UK it seems relatively unusual - I wouldn't normally expect an employer to broach relocation in a conversation like this. People often have partners whose commutes would be upset, or mortgages and tenancies that would be upset, or kids whose schooling would be upset, and so on. And on the employer's side, relocation packages are slow and high-risk - the worker doesn't fit in the job, or misses their friends and family, etc.
    – Steve
    Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 21:55
  • 2
    In the UK, you think 100 miles is a long distance. In the US, we think 100 years is a long time. Very different scales.
    – keshlam
    Commented Aug 5, 2023 at 22:35

I wouldnt mention the other offer at all (as its a threat, I as an employer would react negatively to it and so would my previous employers).

I would say that you really like the job and would like to take it (don't make it conditional). It is a long commute for you. It would be really good, if they would let you work remotely, part of the weak. Or would they be amenable to give you a relocation allowance. (Rephrase to suit)

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