A coworker routinely asks me to stay late and help him close. He does this when I’m a mid shifter and sometimes when I open. He already got in trouble for staying late while he is closing; we have to leave early if we do stay late by Friday.

Tonight I don’t know what to do. I already told him I can’t stay late. I’m exhausted from the weekend. I just wanna go home eat dinner and just enjoy my night. The coworker that was supposed to be working with him called out because he was in the hospital. I was there till 630 and he asked "Are you willing to stay and help me?" I’d been there since 10 AM. I didn’t wanna be there till nine to help him alone.

No one has ever helped me when I was closing. I close by myself. I get it done in 2 1/2 hours. With this coworker, it’s getting to a point where I don’t want to help him anymore. When he actually needs help, he’s not gonna get it. I’m half tempted to tell my manager that he keeps asking me to stay late. I just don’t know what to do. I would love to help him, but that’s too much. Sometimes he calls his sister and ask her to come in and help him, but it’s getting to a point where she doesn’t even come in anymore to help him.

I just honestly don’t know what to do. I just wanna say "no I can’t" and for him to just understand. How can I get that across? Or should I tell my manager?


4 Answers 4


I just wanna say no I can’t and him to just understand.

The first part is simple and totally within your control.

The second part should not concern you at all.


"It’s getting to a point where she doesn’t even come in anymore to help him."

Listen, it's gotta get to the point where you don't even stay late anymore to help him. That's all.


Your colleague seems to be either lazy or incompetent, in any case he will need to change, and you can't force that. I'd recommend starting by just saying you can't stay late because "Insert excuse", don't give too much information, just say you can't.No matter how much he insists, just let him know that you have other plans that can't be changed. Hopefully he gets the hint and stops asking, make the excuses more ridiculous if you want to have fun.

While doing the above I would talk to a manager, he is making you push yourself too hard, you also need proper rest.

  • No need to insert excuse. "I can't stay late tonight." I also don't think you need to denounce the coworker to a manager - just learn to say no and don't stay late.
    – Stef
    Apr 10 at 9:18
  • I mean in the sense that if the managers happen to catch him staying to late he might just fire him, afterwards there's no one to ask OP to stay late.
    – Or4ng3h4t
    Apr 10 at 13:52

Or should I tell my manager?

Yes, exactly. But primarily your coworker needs to talk to the manager.

Reply politely to your coworker that in general you are willing to but you have a personal appointment which you can not easily shift on short notice and would cause you additional trouble and/or costs to do so. Tell them that they need to call the manager if they regularly need more help in closing.

You can write a text or email to the manager clarifying if they wish that you assist in closing and/or work longer/other hours.

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