How to overcome fear of a workplace? [duplicate]

Question

First of all, I will tell something about me. I am not a gifted guy with a lot of intelligence and other talents. But if I am prepared, I can do really good (I have observed it, several times…), but if I am unprepared, the results are just average.

In first job, environment was very cool, no work load, easy-work. At that place, only I was able to perform very well. Other colleagues were not so intelligent (sorry to mention that) but I didn’t underestimate them. There I used to get respect, I had good friends and I used to be very happy. But, after a while, I decided to do some good quality work and also I wanted to change my domain, hence I switched to a new start-up company.

In my second job, people are very intelligent and hard-working and also enjoying. Now, the thing is I am unable to adjust here. As it is a startup, people are very less. It happened that sometimes I was not able to work properly (also, because I am new to this domain), I got scolded. There is no-one in my team of my age whom I can ask, if I get stuck somewhere, I struggle for it.

And then also, if I don’t get it, I ask to my mentor with hesitation. I hesitate here to ask questions. Sometimes, I fear that someone will scold me or something… so I have to study something at home (even at weekends) and then go to office. I fear to go to office. I am feeling like that I am above-average (since I am able to do easy to average tasks very easily ) but not good (unable to perform well at tough tasks) .

I know that I should act bravely, I am working on it. But still I am not feeling happy.

So, here are my questions:

• Is is better to be in work-environment where you are struggling to be good with little-respect or where you are already good, well-respected but not-struggling ?
• What should I do in my current situation?
• Is it that I will be only good at easy tasks and not tough ones?

Answer 1

You need time to learn new things, and only experience can teach you at times, in most jobs at least. They gave you that job. Also, I'm against scolding, unless you mean constructive criticism.

Not asking is only worse. You need to try to ask and see what happens. We all should experiment like that in life, but we often avoid that. It's common. I was dumbfounded many times, when I asked and expected to be yelled at, response wasn't negative at all, but quite opposite.If you haven't tried asking your mentor, absolutely try it, it might prove to be opposite of what you are afraid of. Be polite, ask nicely,that's it. If they won't help you,don't take it personally,maybe you can try working it out yourself.

Whether you will strive to be better in tougher environment, or work easily in easy-going environment, is up to you. Some people have to build respect,some get it immediately, it's normal. If you want to become better at what you do in new a new job, do it, if not, get back where you think you fit. If you think you are too far away from being fit for this job, than maybe it's better for you to shift. If it's just self-doubt because someone scolded you, than you need to build yourself stronger. Don't allow some inpatient @55hole to make you feel worse. Don't take it personally, you know what you know,and there'll always be place for improvement.

I'd suggest you don't give up right away. Give yourself more time to see if you can do it or not.

Is it that I will be only good at easy tasks and not tough ones ??

that's self-doubt speaking out of you already. you don't know until you try. Some tasks ask for more knowledge, more experience, more time. No one can predict if you'll be good at tough tasks in the future. Your life is your own big experiment, so is mine and everyone else's. You HAVE to try, there is no ready solution for such things.

Answer 2

So, here are my questions:

• Is is better to be in work-environment where you are struggling to be good with little-respect or where you are already good, well-respected but not-struggling ?
• What should I do in my current situation?
• Is it that I will be only good at easy tasks and not tough ones?

If you have to ask these questions, then your workplace environment is not good for you. Nothing more. Nothing less.

That said it depends on what is the worst thing that would happen if you left. Would you be unemployable? Do you need a reference from the current employer so you want to be as ethical about leaving as possible?

Ultimately, a job is not a life. But if you are going to spend 8 hours a day, 5 days a week at a place & you do not feel comfortable, you need to remedy that situation.

In short: If you walk into a workplace in fear on a daily basis, you might need to just leave.