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I had my annual appraisal discussion recently and it was virtually an ambush. I thought I had done really well and handled my previous project in the best way possible. However, during the discussion my manager focused mainly on my negatives and brushed all the positives under the carpet and acted as if it was nothing worth mentioning.

I am planning to quit the organization and I had almost made up my mind much before the appraisal discussion. What happened only helped strengthen my resolve.

My managers main point of contention was that I did not go the extra mile and said said no to several incoming requests for change. (The project requirements were changing even while final testing was going on). I did it with the assumption that the delivery date could not be extended and so I had to take a call what went in and what did not. I actually considered this an essential part of my role. Apparently, my manager didn't seem to think so.

[Edit] To clarify the above statement, I made it clear that some of the changes would be difficult or time consuming and would be difficult to get done in the schedule we had. However, most of the items were taken up in the end and completed although the schedule had to be extended to accommodate this.

During the discussion I was shell shocked by the feedback and did not say anything during that time. However, now that I have had some time to think about it, I have several things to say in my defense. With my experience with several managers before this, I am more or less certain that the discussion may not serve to change anyone's mind but I do not want them to take my silence as agreement.

On the other hand, since I am planning to quit anyway, I could suffer through the time I have left and leave without saying anything.

Which would be the better approach?

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  • said no to several incoming requests for change and I had to take a call what went in and what did not, If the request was from the manager or the lead, then it's not your call. – scaaahu May 21 '15 at 4:36
  • @scaaahu: See my edit above. I am the technical lead for the project. – bobbyalex May 21 '15 at 4:41
  • Did you discuss the impact due to the change prior to the delivery? Sometimes, the manager does have the overriding power. – scaaahu May 21 '15 at 4:52
  • @scaaahu Their problem was me telling that it was difficult to do given the technical complexity and schedule. Basically they don't expect me to say no to anything. – bobbyalex May 21 '15 at 4:54
  • @legomaker, did you keep your manager in the loop? I mean regular updates, CC'ing them on somewhat important mails, not just one conversation about how difficult an extension is? Many managers, even ones that delagate well and respect your decisions, really expect this to avoid suddenly being confronted with a major issue like you describe. If you actually did that and your manager did not intervene him/herself at that time, quitting is the best you can do, as you've just got a bad manager. – KillianDS May 21 '15 at 6:57
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Short answer: Don't bother responding. If you are already quitting anyway, then just let it roll off your back and leave.

If you are planning to quit, then I would keep my opinion to myself, find the job and be happy in your new role. It never ends well when you spray vitriol in an organisation as you leave. It sullies your reputation far more than it does the organisation you are leaving.

If you feel the way you have been treated is unfair and there is little chance it will make a difference by saying anything, then prove that you are the professional one and move on.

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    Jane, I really dont want to 'get back' at them (although I would love to) but thought I would feel better if I was able to enumerate what I actually did and tell them that why I took a call on certain things. But yeah.. I guess what you said makes sense. – bobbyalex May 21 '15 at 4:52
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    @legomaker I do understand that, but it would probably come through as "getting back" at them. Just maintain your professionalism, leave, and move on to a better job where you can be happy! :) – Jane S May 21 '15 at 4:54
  • I totally agree with @Jane S. legomaker, forget about this bad experience . Cool down. Find a better job. – samarasa May 21 '15 at 4:56
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With my experience with several managers before this, I am more or less certain that the discussion may not serve to change anyone's mind but I do not want them to take my silence as agreement.

On the other hand, since I am planning to quit anyway, I could suffer through the time I have left and leave without saying anything.

Which would be the better approach?

Other than a short burst of "Ha, take that!" and feeling a bit better for a moment or two, what possible good can come of a late retort to your annual review?

If you had said something during the initial discussion, that might have been better. But you were silent then, you are now planning to leave - there is no value in going back and making counter-claims.

You already know that you won't change anyone's mind - why would you care if someone thinks you agree with their assessment or not?

Time to stay silent, put this behind you, find your next position, leave on as good terms as you can, and move on.

For your own benefit, you may want to think the situation through and learn for yourself how you and your manager could come to such different conclusions. My thoughts are that there should never be any surprises during an Annual Review. If there are, then neither party has communicated well enough during the past year.

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You used your discretion to decide what went in and what did not. Was your management in on your decisions? If you left them out of the loop and you didn't give them a chance to weigh in, let alone object, I can see why they are resentful. In fact, they could see your decision making as high handed. The decisions you made may have been defensible from a strictly technical viewpoint but don't expect any thanks for that.

Your performance review clearly shows that you and your management are not on the same page. The question is, what are you going to do going forward to make sure that you and your management are working in sync? Because it is YOUR responsibility to make sure that you and your management are in sync.

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