I have been with my current company for a bit over a year. I do good work and constantly get good feedback from other teams/managers that I work with outside of my typical team at different office locations. But my manager on the other hand thinks differently. He said to me he thinks I have autism or some mental health problems (which I don't). He also constantly calls me lazy, a high-maintenance employee and mocks me on a regular basis.

I have become pretty stressed out and I hate going to work because of it. He doesn't provide any proper constructive feedback and it's always just insults when he gives me feedback. He also was saying to me, he was going to give me bad review based on personal relationships rather than a professional one.

How should I go about handling this?

I spoke to him directly about these issues but whenever I bring it up the situation usually just gets worst. I even told him if I report this to HR or my manager's manager, he said I would be burning bridges, so I do not know what to do?

Update on this:

  • I ended up being let go.
  • Already had another better job offer lined up and the day I was let go I was going to resign so it worked great for me.
  • 8
    Report it to HR. It's a threat by him so what do you have to lose?
    – KMSTR
    Oct 14, 2015 at 14:35
  • I don't see where the OP ever said this, @JoeStrazzere Oct 14, 2015 at 18:20
  • You could also consider asking for an internal transfer if there is a job that you could fill under a different manager,
    – HLGEM
    Oct 14, 2015 at 18:23
  • 2
    Sounds like this is a manager where you really want to burn all bridges.
    – gnasher729
    Oct 14, 2015 at 18:52

3 Answers 3


I even told him if I report this to HR or my manager's manager, he said I would be burning bridges

Burning bridges is better than being burnout and a loss in work satisfaction, cause the latter would result in resignation and much worse, demotivation and depression, which isn't really good for you.

So, you report to the HR and then to his manager.

If they do not pay heed to your requests, then you might want to re-consider your future at the company; as lack of work satisfaction is very dangerous which can critically de-motivate you and can haunt you in your future endeavours too.

I would also recommend you look at @BillLeeper's comment below

  • @JoeStrazzere I didn't notice this (workplace.stackexchange.com/questions/55959/…) So, this answer was just for this question. In that case, I would suggest him to just leave as the situation ain't going to get better.
    – Dawny33
    Oct 15, 2015 at 3:59
  • 3
    This guy is a bully and saying you are burning bridges is another way of him controlling you. Have a sit down with HR ASAP, use 'workplace bullying' in your complaint. Indicate he has threatened your career if you complain. Depending on laws in your country/state, a hidden recorder might be useful as well to capture exactly what's going on to prevent him from lying to his management during an investigation. These types of manager are a cancer on your company and should be removed IMO. Oct 15, 2015 at 15:06
  • @BillLeeper +1. I have added a reference to your comment in my answer.
    – Dawny33
    Oct 15, 2015 at 17:05

If all you have is your words against his then you'd have very little to go on. If you have any email communication with him where he does this, I would keep it. Also, check with your local state laws about recording conversations and if consent has to be one person. If it is, feel free to start recording conversations with him and if he ever talks about these personal attacks, you have more than enough proof.

As far as burning bridges, it's already burnt because you won't get a good reference from him. I would simply proceed with the idea that either you quit now or try to build up a good case supporting you. I don't recommend going to HR without some concrete proof. His behavior is very unprofessional and as such you're going to need more than just words.


I even told him if I report this to HR or my manager's manager, he said I would be burning bridges, so I do not know what to do?

The end result of doing this should be your incompetent manager being fired. Burning bridges in such a scenario is a perfectly fine side effect.

Stop letting this cancer bully you and harm the company. Get evidence and go to their boss. If their boss does not take meaningful action (firing your manager, or your manager apologizes and ceases all offensive action) within a week, go to HR. If HR does not take meaningful action within a week, if I were you I would perhaps take a closer look into your local labor laws.

And of course, I would update my resume today since companies that let this sort of thing happen are usually incapable of meaningful action.

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