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I found a new job recently and I haven't got any vacation yet that I can take.

I talked to my boss already to take some vacation at the end of the month for a very good reason -to pass my Master's degree exams-.

However next week I found out that my partner has an extremely important medical meeting with a doctor and doesn't want to go alone.

I would like to ask to take the afternoon but don't know how to tell my boss about the reason without revealing my sexual orientation or lying.

Is there any way to go about this?

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    When will you accrue vacation? Can't you just ask for a half day now for a personal matter to be deducted from the vacation once you accrue it? – Martin Smith Jun 8 '16 at 11:30
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    If you have separate sick leave, is it possible to use that instead of vacation? Different companies may be more or less strict on when you can use sick time for people other than yourself, though. – Thomas Owens Jun 8 '16 at 11:31
  • Is the time you are taking off unpaid or advanced leave (take it now, earn it later)? I'm assuming you told the boss the reason for the first one, but now don't want to tell the boss the reason for this one. Is that correct? If you feel that since you've set a precedent of informing the boss, you could always just say "for an important Doctor appointment". – mikeazo Jun 8 '16 at 11:31
  • @MartinSmith I will accrue vacation at the end of the month. Well yes I can ask as you said, but is that the right way, no, the best way to go about it? The time I'll take for exams is advanced leave and that is correct that I told him the first one and don't want to tell him the reason for this one. I do indeed feel that I set a precedent... – Joze Jun 8 '16 at 11:35
  • @Joze docters appointment. Thats all the Boss needs to know. If he has more questions reply it is kind of private or I rather not say. – Raoul Mensink Jun 9 '16 at 11:19
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I would like to ask to take the afternoon but don't know how to tell my boss about the reason without revealing my sexual orientation or lying.

Is there any way to go about this?

It's perfectly reasonable to ask to take the afternoon "to attend to a personal matter".

Most employers won't probe any deeper, unless for some reason that is a critical time for you to be in the office.

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    If they do probe you can always say "close friend" without lying or revealing sexual orientation. – Doyle Lewis Jun 8 '16 at 13:12
  • I agree with @DoyleLewis. I have often said "a friend" or simply "someone" when I didn't feel like revealing it was my boyfriend. – David K Jun 9 '16 at 12:05
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Just say you have to go to A doctor's appointment and need to take a half-day. They likely won't ask questions beyond that, and you're not lying, even though it's not YOUR doctor's appointment.

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  • This. You don't say whether you are in the US, but generally it's acceptable to use sick leave to care from someone other than yourself. Even if you aren't married, I don't think boyfriend/girlfriend would get you in trouble. But you never have to say why you are taking time off, just what kind of leave. Doctor's appointment is enough info. – TechnicalEmployee Jun 10 '16 at 17:01

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