I was recruited to a software engineering company right out of college (I graduated in May). I've worked here for about 3 months, then I got engaged to my bf who lives back in my college town. We were discussing where we should live; if he should move here or if I should move there.

I decided to move back. I would rather be home, and besides, I'm not really happy with this job. I was told I would be working with current languages, but instead I'm working with an outdated, in-house language (it's SQL-ish)

I did well in school; I was an honors student, had an internship, won some stuff etc. However, I have not gotten the experience I thought I would get from this job, and I'm worried that leaving so early, with little to show for it, would make me look like I am unreliable. For example, I'm trying to apply to some database jobs, but they all want SQL experience. I only have experience in psuedoSQL. Would that cut it?

I'm not an unreliable person, and I'm not a slacker, but these last few months haven't gotten me far and I don't want to pause my life out of deference to a company I have little loyalty to. What should I do?

  • 1
    (What prevents you from learning and practicing SQL in your free time?)
    – deviantfan
    Commented Sep 20, 2016 at 2:25
  • 1
    If I had more time, I would. But I got engaged and began the job search last week. I want a good job I know I can get soon.
    – user52991
    Commented Sep 20, 2016 at 3:00
  • First job out of college? Don't worry about it if it doesn't work out. That's very common and almost no one will hold it against you. Use it as a learning experience and try to pick a more compatible employer next time.
    – teego1967
    Commented Sep 20, 2016 at 10:57
  • Also remember that the reason you resigned, getting married, is a one-time occurence that's not going to repeat itself. Hopefully. Commented Sep 20, 2016 at 12:25

2 Answers 2


Just gracefully resign and move on. Life's too short and 3 months is barely a probationary period where (in most non US countries) either party can decide the partnership is not right without making a big deal out of it.

Also remember your CV/resume is a marketing document, not a legal factual record of your life. If there's truly nothing about this job that is transferable, just leave it off. Again, 3-4 months out of college gives you this opportunity.

You have good reasons for leaving which you can make a reasonable case with. I'd not mention the issues with the company or the language though.

Learn SQL as you go but don't sweat it too much. Look for jobs with skills you have + SQL and prove what you know when you have to. You're so fresh out of school you'll most likely only be considered for entry level jobs anyway where little actual experience is expected. It's not a big deal yet.

This is one of the few times the decision will be so clear-cut (at least to people who are not you - that's hard sometimes). Go for it and move on with your life.

Good luck!


You will not look like a job hopper after one episode like that.

Things like this happen quite often on a global/employer scale. The recruiter will probably ask for reason why you ended a job after 3 months, and it's a pretty good one. Also IMHO you would look more reliable, because it seems your personal situation is stabilized now. I.e. it's quite unexpected to make another jump like that anytime soon.

Even a bad employer/employee fit is not a bad reason to leave after a quarter. Taking a job is not a life-time commitment, and it's better to have a happy fitting worker, than unhappy unproductive one.

During an interview, you don't have to include that specific reason (using proprietary in-house solutions) for leaving as it is not even a deciding factor in your case. You could mention it as a drawback of a former job. Obviously position hinging on a skill having no value outside that company is a serious growth limitng factor, quite important for people new in the job market. I think it counts as being reasonable, but if you apply to a company which also uses such tools they might take it "50-50".

Also, having 3-months experience with actual work with SQL-like things is still a lot, compared to nothing. Just be sure to know the differences. If you go and say, "I've worked with something similar to SQL" it begs for a question on the similarities and differences. Heck, 3-months of any actual job is better than none, unless you were fired for some misconduct. I would advise against leaving it out, unless you ran out of space in "Experience" section of you CV.

In my locale a 3-month period is a usual evaluation time, people forget it is mutual.

You should worry if you have 2-3+ consecutives entries like that, because chances of hitting 3 jobs which do not fit are slim, and start to indicate that the canditate is hard to be fit anywhere.

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