Panic attacks: Post-interview recovery

Question

I have social anxiety. It is diagnosed and I have received medical treatment for this.

Interviews can be a trigger for my panic attacks. These involve crying uncontrollably, shaking, skin conditions (e.g. rashes), hyperventilating, nausea, dizziness, dry mouth, can't think or speak, fainting.

How can I save face after having a serious panic attack in an interview? Is this even possible? Should I send an apology along with the follow-up "thank you" email for having a panic attack in an interview? Should I explain what happened? Should I explain how this wouldn't impact my role if I did get this job? How should I phrase this correspondence? Should I send no follow-up at all and just forget about it?

For context, here are details of an interview I would like to apologise for:

Dream job, great company that I really wanted to work for. It was a ~seven hour journey to their offices, so I couldn't do my usual plan of doing a test run and on the day I got lost so I was a bit late.

I have a panic attack after sitting down, just after calmly smiling and shaking hands with the 3 interviewers. I'm crying, shaking/etc and an interviewer brings me of the room. She gives me tissues and a few moments. She asks if I can come back later as they need to be strict with time-keeping as they have many people to interview today. I have tickets booked home, I can't stay and I panic a bit more, but am able to say that to her (I think?). She brings me back in, but I can't really answer the questions and what I do say is nonsense. I'm being lead out the door of the offices still crying and I then have a series of panic attacks throughout the day, including fainting.

I didn't tell them I had social anxiety prior to the interview. Honestly, I didn't think this would happen. I had a group interview with the same company before this one where we did a fun presentation (public speaking, spontaneous problem-solving, working in groups, etc) - I was 100% fine with all that and really enjoyed it.

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I am aware of one similar question to this, but it is very specific to writing an apology letter. I am looking for general tips on how to recover and save face after having a panic attack in an interview and hopefully still move forward with the job process. There's also another thread dealing with panic attacks during the interviews and pre-interview prep, but again not post-interview. So, I think I have reason to ask my own separate question.

Answer 1

You didn't get this job. You won't get any job in that company. HR will have records of all previous interviews, and they'll know what happened; they won't invite you back.

Emailed apologies etc. won't change that fact. All you can do is move on.

Answer 2

It's unfortunate that you're plagued by social anxiety and panic attacks in such a fashion. I can't say that job interviews cause panic attacks for me, and in fact my triggers are different (but thankfully rare), but I can understand why it is a problem.

The big issue here is making the interviewer aware of your social anxiety, and to be honest, there isn't really a good way to say it. I'm also sorry to say that Pete is right; you probably didn't bag this one, and an emailed apology isn't going to do much at this point. The company doesn't have time to care, to be honest, and don't take that the wrong way!

I've seen from your comments that you've worked on your panic attacks for a while, and you're absolutely right, there is no rhyme or reason as to why they occur, or when they will occur; the same situation twice-over could have drastically different responses from you. The key thing here is to move on; gain more practice with interviews, become more comfortable in that environment. Focus on what parts of an interview set you off, etc. etc., stuff you've probably heard before.

Answer 3

They don't care, not as a business anyway.

If it makes you feel better you can send a letter to thank for the interview and tell what happened but it won't change anything, in their eyes you're too much of a wildcard.

Right now you need to move on, in the future you can apply again and even address the fact that you were fighting anxiety in the past that you've either overcome at that time or address it if you think there's a chance it might happen again and the outcome of the interview really matters to you.

Off topic to the question, but related to your issue however, I recommend Dale Carnegie's How to stop worrying and start living. It might not solve all of your problems but I'll be damned if it doesn't help up to a certain degree. I'd be interested in hearing your opinion about it if you do.

Good luck in finding a new job, I hope you'll find a window in the future to apply again for the dream job, but right now you need to address the fact that you can't change anything so worrying about this or giving it too much thought is not going to help you. Doing everything that is in your power to get a new job should be your primary focus right now.

Answer 4

I have severe panic disorder myself, so I am not unsympathetic. I am on Ativan four times a day for it, so I do understand. That said, there is nothing that can be done to save face. Anything you do at this point will only make it worse. Consider that door closed, all you can do is learn from this, continue to improve, and move on.

What you can do to help in the future is go on practice interviews. There are professional services that do that, or you can practice with friends. I've read other answers and your comments as well, and yes, the attacks make no sense, and if you're like me, you also end up making them worse by trying to figure them out and you panic over not being able to figure out why your panicking.

What has helped me is repetition, repetition, repetition, and more repetition. After the bottom dropped out of the IT market in 2001, I went on literally dozens of interviews. When it became such a regular occurrence, it began to become mundane. This is why I suggest practice interviews.

I know this is terribly frustrating for you, especially since you've had a door slammed on you. All I can say is if you are really interested in that company, keep applying. There is a chance that anyone who remembers you may just chalk it up to you having a bad day that time. Don't try to explain anything, because people will just take it as making excuses. It's not fair, but it is the way things work.

If you see another opening apply. Someone like me may see your application and figure, well, if this person is brave enough to try again, I'll squeeze them in". Don't lose heart. Just keep trying, and you'll overcome this.

Answer 5

I've been in a similar situation many times and firstly I'd just like to say that I'm really sorry it turned out that way and I completely understand how frustrating and embarrassing the whole situation is.

However, I noticed in some of your comments that you mentioned wanting to bring up having panic disorder somewhere in your resume/prior to interviews. I strongly advise against doing this. It might seem like a nice cushion to have under you if you go into an interview and have a fit, but I can guarantee you it'll hurt more than help.

At worst the hiring manager might not give you proper consideration (which is illegal but unfortunately happens). At best it will make you feel better after having a panic attack at an interview but likely will not have any effect on the outcome. I know that it feels safer, but I don't know if the risks are necessarily worth the small boost in confidence.

The only context you would want to disclose that information before an interview is if it in some way benefits you or makes you look like a stronger candidate (i.e. interviewing for a company that provides resources for recovering anxiety/depression sufferers). Even then, you're going to want to present yourself more as a survivor than as a sufferer.

Either way, take some time to recover. Go for a nice walk, or get a cup of coffee. Talk to your doctor, talk to your friends, talk to whoever helps. And most importantly, don't let this hiccup ruin the future. You're already taking great steps to crushing this problem, and you should feel good about that!

Answer 6

The next time you have an interview that could possibly trigger your panic attacks, you need to tell the company about your medical situation ahead of time.

It's a bit of a disability and many companies are required to provide reasonable accommodation for disabilities, as long as you can still do the job. But they can't accommodate you if you hide it. In addition, it should be fair game for them to ask you some questions about it, for the sake of making sure you can do the job (not to pry into your medical history) and for knowing how well they can accommodate you.

As for this situation, it won't hurt, I think, to contact them and explain that you are prone to panic attacks and that you are under treatment. If you do not think that your medical diagnosis will get in the way of you being able to do the job, you need to tell them. Maybe phrase your letter or phone call as saying you regret not bringing this up earlier, but you didn't think it would be an issue due to your successful previous interviews, etc, etc. It sounds like too much time has passed for this round, so you may not be able to get this job now, but maybe in the future they will consider you if another position opens up. I would try calling vs emailing, if possible, because this is a health issue and personal issues are best discussed on the phone.

Answer 7

You mentioned that you were 100% fine when you did the fun presentation.

Maybe you can try this, imagine when you go for an interview, you are actually going to meet a long lost friend and instead of going for an 'interview', tell yourself, its a pre-planned casual conversation between 2 people. Its just that the conversation topics will be more work related. You can also tell yourself you have nothing to lose, there are many job interviews in the sea!

Also, to relive the stress and anxiety, just before the 'interview', tell yourself you don't really need this job you are interviewing for you are here just for kicks / fun / experience. By doing so, you will relieve the pressure and stress on yourself and should allow you stay calm throughout the conversation.

All the best!