Received a too-good-to-refuse approach. I'm happy at my job and need help dealing with change [closed]

Question

here's to hoping some of you can help me out settle on my concerns..

I'm a developer at a medium sized company and I currently like my position. However, I am not very motivated on my current work and think my assignments aren't well managed by superiors but I can do it fairly well despite not "loving" it.

All in all, I like the environment and most of the colleagues and I've joined them as a rookie and after three years I realize I have learned A LOT and am treated as a valuable member.

Recently, I was contacted by a company that is largely superior and has worldwide business for a job I'd love to do. This means the possibility of double the paycheck, the experience and working in what really gets me going... but also relocating to 300 KM away.

There are three things concerning me at this point:

• Despite having a decent resume for my age, this company is looking for some top quality developers, which I clearly still am not. I learn quickly and have tried a lot of technologies but I don't have the experience a developer with 10 years of experience would have. I feel I may not be up to the task and if they do hire me I fear I'll end up not being good enough and a disappointment TO MYSELF (not others).

• I am appointed for a certification exam that I would like to complete but I feel bad doing it and then leaving, also cause the company needs certified professionals and I'd be taking one away from them. I am also working on things that the company really feels they need and I'm an important asset in achieving them since I have a set of skills that no one else has in that specific area.

• My current job taught me a lot, the company has really backed me up in times of need, they even promoted me recently and I have a stable effective position (no end-term contract). They risked hiring an intern when I was just a kid and gave me space to grow and now I've become someone they trust and value.

So all in all ... I realize I got to take the risk for myself, it will be hard but I'd feel worthless if I do get this opportunity. I would love to take it, make sure I can do it and see where my boundaries lie and show myself I'm able to pull it off even on a bigger company.

However, as you've realized by now it makes me very sad to leave this people "behind" and I feel my boss and colleagues will not see how big this might be for me. I've had possibility of leaving before and rejected them all but this time it's different.

Some important clarifications:

1. I did not search for this job, they came to me and suggested talks, asking me to send my CV in even knowing that I only had 3 years of experience.

2. I have no official proposal yet. They seem interested but are still evaluating the resume. There is no guarantee I'll even get this job (this is the crazy part, I'm stressing out and might not even get past this point).

3. I have never lived anywhere else and as you may guess I'm inexperienced at the whole house searching and I don't know the city myself. It's entirely new and I've never lived alone before.

4. I would like to make sure this is an undeniable offer if I decide to take it and would 100% love to be able to visit my old company and go out on a positive notice. These people helped me a lot and I want it to be an open door, even because things may not workout at all and I might have to humble out back home.

PS: I do realize this is a more professional environment and I notice I can't keep my words away from my feelings, so I'm sorry if you this seems an "unprofessional" post that should not be here at all.

EDIT: The questions in case are probably "How can I be sure I'm ready to change jobs/responsibilities?" and "How can I make sure I leave my company on the best possible note?"

Answer 1

1. Go through with the Interview process and give it your all, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
2. If you don't get an offer, stay where you are. It was a good learning experience and you can do better next time.
3. Don't worry about anything until you have an offer in hand or the company comes back with "yes, we want you". Before that there is no decision for you to make, and nothing you can do other than doing your best in the interview process
4. If you have the offer or a strong statement of interest you can look at the specifics and know a lot more

If you get to that stage, you can asses with way more knowledge than you have now

1. If the company didn't think you are up for it, they wouldn't offer
2. You'll have a much better understanding of what the job is, how you fit in, and how the career outlook stacks up against your current gig.
3. You know the financials: you can look at cost of living differences, package differences etc. with actual data
4. You can take a trip to the new place and see how you like it. You'll probably do this during the interview anyway.
5. You can still say no.

Answer 2

As a newly-minted dev I can understand your concerns very, very well. The end result is, as sometimes is inevitable, you're going to have to weigh the pros and cons and make the decision for yourself. A few points: 1) Is the additional 300km going to be a problem for you? Do you feel comfortable relocating, now and in the longterm?

2) Have you gotten an offer from the other company or simply a request for interview? If you're just up for interview then you're clearly putting the cart ahead of the horse. Slow down and make sure this is really a pressing issue. If you DO have an offer, make it clear that you'll need about a week to think it over. (Yes, I know you said this, but you need thinking points, so here it is)

3) Everyone wants to be happy. Is staying where you are going to make you happy in the long run? Do you love your job? The people? Is the money more important than that in the long run? Will you get more experience and be more valuable where you are or where you can go? I always looked at my growth: can I still grow in this pot or do I need a transplant to a larger area? Will I grow in this company in the long-term or will you stagnate after they get your certification

4) I know that good, dependable companies are hard to find, but not impossible. They helped you out now, backed you now, but will that last and if it does, how important will it be? Will the new company be as good to you (you can't know that without knowing someone there).

Lastly, and this is the hard one, adulting is HARD. New cities, new experiences, new people...these are all hard things to quantify. I moved 800 miles across my state to look for a job I didn't even know I wanted. I uprooted my wife and newborn son to move to a place with no friends and little family, a place where my wife had no one but me. It was a pain the first couple of years, but it was great for us in the long run. You must learn to think critically, decide what is important to you and then act on that.

Good luck, whatever you decide!