About six months ago, I started my new position as DoT. Initially, things went well and I was very enthusiastic about my new position. I spent a great deal of time, improving the company standards at every level, reducing technical debt and making various processes less fragile, improving communication. My boss, COO, at some point and time, start to consider me a threat when investors and other people start to ask me questions about the state of affairs (He communicated this message through one of his employees who is close to him). He tried to appoint his favorite girl (which quite a few people think he is having an affair with), who has no experience managing any small or large project. I very much reacted to that fact by submitting my resignation at which point he tried to remedy the situation by asking me to stay, which I did despite his insulting behavior earlier.

Things have progressively gotten worse, which include his very rash behavior, screaming at me (and others) for literally no reasons, negative attitude, holding me accountable for stuff that is not my responsibility, nit-picking, reneging on his agreement when I joined the company (such as vacation). For example, we agreed to 3 weeks vacation, even though I work as a consultant for taxation reason. When I requested vacation, he made a big deal about it, let me know that I am contractor hence there is no such thing as vacation and 'I should be even asking for a vacation', while other people who are on his favorite list get vacation as contractor and they announce it openly in meetings. Anther example is when a girl, who lives quite far away, walked in the room when he was in development room angry about some crisis. He told her 'this is not a hotel, that she can walk in anytime' and a bunch of other nasty stuff. She has told me earlier that she will be late, and has followed company policy of being late. I had to apologize to her later.

I have submitted my resignation twice and rescinded it because he apologized and most importantly I wanted to finish what I started. I am thinking of submitted my resignation again. This behavior is not limited to me. Former DoT quit on very unpleasant terms because they were having shouting matches in the lobby. Two women have quit because of his insulting attitude, one of the has tried to sue him for discrimination. The whole development team hates him, former tech lead quit because of him.

I very much a workaholic person, but since all this, I have lost my enthusiasm. Work has become a drag. On one hand I want to quit, but on the other hand, I want to finish the new architecture for the latest product (FYI, I also architect and code). I am not sure what to do, and how to approach this. Should I stick around because he apologized but I am not sure if he will not do this again? Should I seek some legal counsel? Or should I just quit and never look back?

  • 3
    If you were to resign, and the COO apologized, would you again rescind your resignation? – Patricia Shanahan Jun 4 '17 at 2:06
  • 5
    You know what to do, you're just making excuses as to why you don't want to do it. – PeteCon Jun 4 '17 at 2:06
  • 6
    What is DoT? Department of Transport? – Masked Man Jun 4 '17 at 3:49
  • Director of Technology – James Kalima Jun 4 '17 at 16:32
  • 1
    "I'm sorry" doesn't change behavior. This seems akin to leaving an abusive relationship: get beat up, threaten to leave, second party apologizes, you stay. Get. Out. Now. Stop letting yourself be repeatedly abused by this same person again and again. You're worth more than that to a company that actually appreciates you. – SliderBlackrose Jun 5 '17 at 15:23

Find a new job. Quit this one. Don't look back.

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