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Questions tagged [colleagues]

Questions regarding the people one works with. This includes questions about communication, teamwork, or other issues caused by ones co-workers.

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625 votes
20 answers
158k views

How should I deal with an employee who has slept with my wife?

I'm the owner of a business with about 30-40 employees. Recently, I found out that one of my employees has been having an affair with my wife. The employee has worked for me for four years. I felt ...
350 votes
18 answers
74k views

Coworker keeps threatening to tattle on me for "time theft"

One of my coworkers is especially nosy and keeps tabs on when I come to work and leave, and how long my lunch break is, how many times I go to the restroom and how long each break takes, and so on. ...
Honda Clarity Plug-In Hybrid's user avatar
247 votes
14 answers
75k views

I've killed my colleagues' characters during RPG session, now they won't talk to me

Introduction I am a software developer and I've been with my current company for about 4 months now. Initially I've generally stuck to myself but after a while (a month?) of getting to know everybody ...
Anon's user avatar
  • 1,743
247 votes
23 answers
112k views

How to gently enforce "nohello" to a coworker?

I am a huge proponent of nohello in the workplace - I get way too many Slack messages and other interrupts to waste time on pleasantries. I keep my Slack status set to "nohello.com" as a way ...
thatgirldm's user avatar
  • 3,240
219 votes
15 answers
37k views

Is it unprofessional to car share?

To save some money, my colleague and I decided to start car sharing to and from work. Our workplace operates a flexible working policy between 7 and 7 and we often come in early and leave early to ...
andtodd's user avatar
  • 2,061
215 votes
16 answers
35k views

Coworkers accusing me of "cheating" for working more efficiently

I'm a CAD drafter. We have quotas of drawings to get done each day, usually 5/day with the correct forms attached with them. Each one would regularly take around 1.5-2 hours at a normal pace, so to ...
user avatar
208 votes
17 answers
41k views

How to deal with a coworker that writes software to give him job security instead of solving problems?

I have a coworker that primarily develops programs for internal use in the company. They design their programs in such a way that they progressively consolidate their position within the company so ...
bob glausl's user avatar
  • 1,518
200 votes
14 answers
40k views

How to politely tell someone to stop explaining?

It happens occasionally, that I come across something I don't know how to do, and I need someone to show me. So I ask Bob for help, because Bob knows this stuff, and he comes over and starts ...
Benubird's user avatar
  • 3,907
198 votes
16 answers
27k views

Supporting developers who insist on using their pet language

I've joined a team of around five developers building a microservice-based website, in a shop that emphasises autonomy and learning. However, it turns out one of the developers is writing "his" parts ...
vavojediha's user avatar
  • 1,123
191 votes
16 answers
61k views

How do I prevent colleagues from making fun of the length of my password?

At work, we were required to choose login passwords on our first day. I choose a long and complex (mixed with numbers and symbols) password, it's easy for me to remember, but hard for anyone standing ...
user avatar
191 votes
15 answers
54k views

How to deal with an "I'm not paid enough to do this task" argument?

I'm the current tech lead and team lead of our development team. We usually function like clockwork (with the intern somewhat behind), but today I encountered a problem that I wasn't able to solve. ...
T. Sar's user avatar
  • 9,187
191 votes
11 answers
39k views

Coworker throwing cigarettes out of a car, I criticized it and now HR is involved

"On my way to work yesterday, one of my coworkers was driving in front of me on the interstate. This coworker is a smoker. When they finished their cigarette, they flicked it out of the window. I ...
USER_8675309's user avatar
  • 5,155
186 votes
11 answers
43k views

How to deal with a coworker who blamed me for the bug that was his fault

I’m relatively new at a job, but have established myself as the “guy” when it comes to a certain web service we use. Our own website integrates with the service. I don’t really work on the site, just ...
Ryan's user avatar
  • 1,431
181 votes
21 answers
35k views

Dealing with reactions from colleague about being self-taught

I'm working as a software developer for a big company in Western Europe. I have 2 years of industry experience and 2 more years as a freelancer doing web apps on the side. All in all, I've been from ...
escplat12's user avatar
  • 1,834
178 votes
12 answers
40k views

Co-worker works way more than he should

I work in a research facility in Germany. I have lots of co-workers that are from other countries, mostly part of some international collaborative research projects. There's one guy from China who's ...
supersoft's user avatar
  • 941
176 votes
16 answers
29k views

How can I dissuade a coworker who is disturbing my work from giving me help I don't feel I need?

When I am focused on a task that is assigned to me, my coworker will frequently shout out "Liz, come here." I go to his desk and find he has been working on my task and he explains to me how to solve ...
Liz at work's user avatar
  • 1,629
171 votes
19 answers
31k views

Should I avoid telling others that I ask questions on Stack Overflow? [closed]

I'm often afraid to tell others that I ask questions on Stack Overflow. A good programmer should be able to solve problems by searching for solutions independently, right? I feel like if someone ...
Gstestso's user avatar
  • 1,177
170 votes
10 answers
49k views

My manager told me to stop helping a (supposedly) underperforming coworker. What are my options?

A bit of background I'm a junior female developer working for a telecommunications company. Shortly after I started, another young woman joined the team. Our manager sat us together with the ...
Trickylastname's user avatar
168 votes
9 answers
36k views

Why would HR think it's inappropriate that I visited a coworker in the hospital?

I just got out of a meeting with my supervisor and a member of our HR department, giving me a "formal warning" for engaging in inappropriate conduct by visiting a coworker in the hospital. HR told me ...
Erguy's user avatar
  • 1,033
167 votes
16 answers
34k views

How to politely ask a coworker to “Google it”

I'm working in a team of 8 consultants just like me. I'm the youngest member of the team and also the one with the least experience (on resume at least). But 4 of the 8 members of the team will often ...
user avatar
167 votes
7 answers
31k views

How to handle unwanted attention from "fans" in the workplace?

(Disclaimer: I am by no means a famous person, but I do have a medium sized YouTube channel with around 100k subscribers.) So it just happened that the company I worked for a couple years now hired ...
user avatar
162 votes
19 answers
38k views

Coworker asking me to not bring cakes due to self control issue. What should I do?

Sometimes I bring cakes to work, e.g. leftovers from birthday party to one of the family members. Most coworkers are happy about it and eat them without a problem, however one employee doesn't want ...
Shadow Wizard's user avatar
160 votes
11 answers
33k views

Having lunch at home

I live near my employer's office. All I need to do to reach home is walk for five minutes. To go straight to the point, I prefer having lunch at home. It costs me way less money than going to ...
Radhwen's user avatar
  • 1,700
156 votes
21 answers
26k views

How to handle colleagues who are unwilling to write a bug report?

I'm working as a software developer at a small-ish company (~50 employees). My main project is a mobile app. I have most of my colleagues on the alpha test channel and customers do not have access to ...
user1261710's user avatar
  • 3,783
154 votes
17 answers
40k views

Is it inappropriate to invite all my coworkers except for one person to a private event?

I work in a fairly small department, I have 8 coworkers. 7 of them are great, we're good friends, and I love spending time with them - we hang out outside of work often, but usually in groups of 3-4. ...
synthesis's user avatar
  • 905
152 votes
12 answers
41k views

Coworker watches content on his phone all day

I work at a software company. I have a coworker who props up his phone most of the day, watching stuff while he works such as video game streamers, or cooking shows, or whatever. He's trying to give ...
default's user avatar
  • 1,091
151 votes
18 answers
25k views

Trouble understanding the speech of overseas colleagues

All of my development colleagues (software development company) are based overseas in India (I'm in the UK). I'm in a junior position and a lot of my development relies on being taught how to do ...
a.mac's user avatar
  • 901
145 votes
12 answers
57k views

Manager has noticed coworker's excessive breaks. Should I warn him?

A junior coworker of mine takes very long breaks every day. I've timed them; he makes hour-long visits to the restroom every day. He is paid by the hour, leaves after 8 hours, and is not allowed to ...
Uli's user avatar
  • 1,181
143 votes
12 answers
32k views

Asked to secretly obtain coworker's knowledge before he gets fired

I was recently told by my manager that one of my coworkers (call him Steve) will be fired in a few weeks, as his last reviews were found unsatisfactory. My manager also told me to "inquire and ...
DarkCygnus's user avatar
  • 83.2k
139 votes
26 answers
24k views

How can I reply to coworkers who accuse me of automating people out of work?

I work in a small manufacturing company on special projects that automate some processes (primarily design/drafting). This automation is mainly targeted at reducing errors, establishing standards, ...
padleyj's user avatar
  • 661
139 votes
6 answers
38k views

How to handle a coworker pretending to be my boss? [duplicate]

I have an odd situation: I have a coworker who acts like he's my boss. I've already confirmed with higher-ups that it's just not true. He'll say all kinds of things like: This is my department. ...
AceOfBoss's user avatar
  • 763
138 votes
12 answers
34k views

I have reason to believe that my very competent coworker is being severely underpaid - any tactful way to tell a boss?

I am located in United States. I have a coworker who is senior to me (in that, if my title is "Blah", his title is literally "Senior Blah"). This morning he made a comment about job postings for a ...
loneboat's user avatar
  • 1,001
137 votes
20 answers
31k views

How to disclose negative information about a candidate when I'd rather not reveal its source?

We are a small start-up and I'm one of the senior members. After a hard work day, I went to a bar, where I met an attractive young nonlocal man. We had a one-night stand. We conducted job interviews ...
user avatar
137 votes
12 answers
24k views

How do I politely coexist with a help vampire?

I'm a senior developer at my workplace. A coworker in my sister team… isn't. They're also a textbook help vampire: they face an issue, they don't understand it, they miss the error message, they ...
badp's user avatar
  • 907
136 votes
9 answers
65k views

What can I do to make a coworker's lack of effort more visible?

There have been a number of questions where people have been dealing with coworkers who were not pulling their weight. The common perception seems to be that this is due to lack of effort or ability. ...
IDrinkandIKnowThings's user avatar
135 votes
7 answers
44k views

My adult son embarrassed me in front of my coworkers - how to react to provocations?

I am located in the north of Germany. We had an event where the whole company got together, about 200 people. We had dinner, a live band, all in all it was a great evening. My small department (about ...
Mom344's user avatar
  • 1,106
134 votes
12 answers
57k views

What can I do about a very loud coworker?

Our office space is pretty tight and there are no cubicles. There is a guy sitting next to me and he is the loudest person I ever met. He is groaning, crackling, puffing, giving loud sighs and ...
Nat's user avatar
  • 1,451
133 votes
26 answers
29k views

Team member is vehemently against code formatting

I am the manager of a small team of developers (5 engineers, including me). A few months ago, on the suggestion of another colleague we introduced mandatory code formatting in the code base, for our ...
mguijarr's user avatar
  • 1,137
131 votes
16 answers
39k views

How can I deal with a coworker who doesn't particularly care about code quality?

I'm a software dev in a small team. I am the most junior member with a couple of years professional experience, but was brought to the (newly formed) team because I had the most hands-on experience ...
Lennart's user avatar
  • 1,036
128 votes
11 answers
32k views

How to react to hostile behavior from a senior developer?

I started working at Dec 2018, currently, there is only me and the senior developer and we sit next to each other. He comes to work really early and leaves early. When I started working I noticed ...
Anon222's user avatar
  • 813
125 votes
13 answers
32k views

How do I ask a friendly coworker to remind me what their name is?

I have a coworker at my place of work that I am somewhat friendly with. Often times when I pass his desk, we'll both say hi and talk for a couple minutes about this or that. We're not exactly close ...
TheSoundDefense's user avatar
125 votes
5 answers
29k views

New colleague is a smoker; I can hardly breathe near him

To be explicit: this is my problem. I'm not "blaming" the new guy (actually he's rather nice). That said ... I'm allergic to smoke. When I was younger, I went "out on the town" only once or twice a ...
KlaymenDK's user avatar
  • 3,136
123 votes
13 answers
28k views

My colleague is constantly blaming me for his errors

I'm a junior software developer in a small company. I'm working on a project since I finished my internship contract 4 months ago. It's a small project, so there's only another programmer (junior too ...
Alex's user avatar
  • 883
122 votes
11 answers
40k views

Coworker curses under his breath as he works - should I ignore?

I work in an office where there are 4 of us in the corners of a cube. One of the guys who sits in an adjacent corner acts a little strange. A few times a day (or more), he curses under his breath as ...
The Spartan's user avatar
122 votes
9 answers
20k views

Colleague blocks change request in peer review because of perceived mistakes in code, but suggested improvements do not work

In the company I work for, change requests go through various steps, including a development step, a peer review step and a testing step. On this particular change request, I have been assigned as a ...
Belle's user avatar
  • 3,712
119 votes
15 answers
18k views

New coworker has strange workplace requirements - how should I deal with them?

A new coworker just started in our office, and on her first day she told us: No one can speak to her. Communication needs to be done over email only. No one can speak in the room we work in. There's ...
user avatar
116 votes
20 answers
32k views

Coworker is trying to get me to sign his petition to run for office. How to decline politely?

My coworker knows that I live in "his district" and he's been coming up to my desk for the past few days asking me to sign his petition to run for local office. Personally we don't share the same ...
Pelican's user avatar
  • 747
116 votes
13 answers
24k views

How to handle a colleague who appears helpful in front of manager but doesn't help in private?

TL;DR A colleague offers (unsolicited) help in front of manager, but actually doesn't help. What to do? The long version: I have recently started on a new job. There is another very senior person, ...
Htg07's user avatar
  • 861
114 votes
10 answers
32k views

How to handle a developer getting defensive when faced with breaking code?

I started working at a company as a junior developer, after finishing a great programming bootcamp with a deep and broad programming knowledge. Since then (1.5 years) I learned a lot, gained ...
HelterSkelter's user avatar
111 votes
19 answers
27k views

Confessions of an incompetent worker. How to cope with colleagues hating me and failing in self improvement?

As the title above explains it all, yes, I suck at my job. Almost 2 years into my job as a system engineer for the IT department of a manufacturing firm, I can confidently do about a portion of my ...
hjh93's user avatar
  • 949

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