Questions tagged [conflict-resolution]

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201
votes
11answers
23k views

How can I stop harassment about my medical condition by the boss's friend? [closed]

A few years back, I was diagnosed with Celiac disease. Though I hate it, I know eating anything containing gluten can land me in the hospital. I take it seriously. However, a few weeks back a coworker ...
166
votes
15answers
41k views

How can I deal with troublesome Professional Engineer?

I currently manage a team of quite a few engineers in Canada. Things normally run smoothly, but we've had a serious problem with a senior engineer as of late. This engineer is the sole engineer on ...
140
votes
12answers
26k views

How to handle incompetent/aggressive customers incapable of describing a problem?

The situation described takes place in Germany, but is not neccessarily linked to German culture. I work in IT support at a library with public workstations, and often encounter (mostly elderly) ...
131
votes
10answers
27k views

How should I approach a boss that keeps hiring temporary workers, only to have me finish something?

Long story short, we've recently had a lot of work to do at my job and in order to fill that vacuum my boss has been hiring temporary workers. At first he hired three which stayed for about two months,...
129
votes
6answers
31k views

How to handle a coworker pretending to be my boss? [duplicate]

I have an odd situation: I have a coworker who acts like he's my boss. I've already confirmed with higher-ups that it's just not true. He'll say all kinds of things like: This is my department. ...
98
votes
15answers
38k views

I snapped at a co-worker, apologized, but now HR wants me to meet with her

I lost my cool after a co-worker sent an email calling out IT for not doing their job (totally unfounded, btw). When I went to investigate the issue, she confronted me and I snapped at her briefly. ...
95
votes
7answers
30k views

Manager wants to hire me; HR does not. How to proceed?

I had a talk with the manager of a technical department at a big sized company I've been doing some work with as a consultant. She told me they are looking for technical people and asked if I'd like ...
90
votes
14answers
29k views

How to ask a non-programmer not to advise me on programming tasks

I have this problem with an otherwise very respectable colleague, who holds the position of consultant/tester in my team. Due to them being in the company twice the years I've been working here, they ...
75
votes
16answers
31k views

I'm being “forced” to put a company magnet on my personal car

I'm not sure how to handle this situation without being fired, even though I think that would be an extreme measure. A little background: I work for a company that frequently requires employees to go ...
70
votes
16answers
27k views

Brother-in-law earns same salary for a much simpler job in family business

I work for a small family business which consists of four employees. My father co-owns the business with another developer who is not related to us. I am a developer who reports to the co-owner. My ...
69
votes
9answers
31k views

Managing difficult employees

I just joined a new company four weeks ago. I am currently in the process of delivering a project, I am the project manager managing a tech lead, developer and dev ops. Out of the 3, one of the ...
67
votes
15answers
21k views

Am I being ethical or annoying in refusing to 1:1 copy another company's UI for our own?

My boss has asked me to implement the UI for a financial calculator from another company's website, specifically one financial conversion tool (as we have a competing product). The other company is a ...
67
votes
12answers
13k views

How to deal with colleague that starts arguments?

The situation: My colleague (let's call him Joe) and I are department heads at a small startup (different departments). I have a lot more experience in my area. We are friends, and we work closely ...
64
votes
10answers
14k views

How should I answer “Tell me about a time you had a conflict at work” if I've never had conflicts?

In the past year I had interviews with a couple of US-based IT companies for a technical role at their European offices. The interviews were eerily similar: phone from HR, coding interviews over video ...
63
votes
11answers
26k views

Complaints from (junior) developers against solution architects: how can we show the benefits of our work and improve relationships?

I’ve been working in an IT company for 7 years (and I have a 14+ total work experience). About 2 years ago I was promoted to the solution architect's office. In my company a solution architect is a ...
59
votes
11answers
11k views

CEO is pressing me regarding decisions made by my former manager whom he fired

I work for a small privately-owned company located in Nevada. Recently, my manager was abruptly fired. In the aftermath, the company CEO began questioning me and demanding that I explain why my ...
53
votes
8answers
15k views

How to respectfully refuse to assist co-workers with IT issues?

I work in a small company and I've helped out my colleagues with small IT issues in the past. However, we just hired a dedicated IT company that is meant to take over all IT issues. My manager has ...
52
votes
4answers
14k views

How to remedy a false accusation in small open office setting

I went on a work trip with my boss and we stayed at an AirBNB that was under my boss's name. She brought along her baby, and wanted a house to stay in so she could hire a babysitter to watch her baby ...
49
votes
6answers
15k views

Accidentally defaced an internal production website during vulnerability scanning - How do I protect myself

I work in the information security department at my employer. Today while using automated tool of Burp Suite on one of our internal web applications in production to search for vulnerabilities, I ...
42
votes
8answers
21k views

Can a boss tell an employee not to go to human resources?

If Alice is having conflicts with Bob and the issue is brought to the boss and the boss doesn't rectify the issue, and also warns Alice that it is advised not to go to HR, what do you do? The ...
39
votes
13answers
10k views

Humiliated in front of employees

I work at a small company of about 20 people. We have the owner/president, 2-3 managers (depending on how you look at it), and the rest of the people are employees. I'm one of the managers. Each day ...
38
votes
7answers
7k views

When should you go to HR vs. your manager with regards to an issue with another employee?

I had a previous role where I was having a problem with a disruptive, socially unaware colleague, and ended up asking HR about how best to handle it. We had a solid talk and it was discussed that I ...
33
votes
5answers
6k views

Dealing with conflict between co-workers for non-work-related issue affecting their work

TL;DR version at the end. I am the unofficial head of a 10 person research team staffed mostly by medical professionals and I seem to have found myself in a bit of a pickle. After a grueling 6 month ...
31
votes
7answers
7k views

My co-worker is not happy when I do well [closed]

I work as a qualified dental technician. I started about a year ago at my current lab and a few months after, a trainee joined. I work part time (30 hours a week) and she works full time. She is hard-...
27
votes
2answers
9k views

Employees working around team member due to his personality

I recently transferred to a different location within my company, which caused changes to my title and duties. The role in question is a programmer role that involves communicating with the end ...
24
votes
11answers
6k views

How to deal with a HR rep that is making me feel super uncomfortable?

I am currently working as an intern software developer at a startup, which consists of the three founders, a HR rep that just joined the company three months ago, another intern, and me who has been ...
22
votes
3answers
2k views

Boss threatens employee with losing their job if they don't cooperate in forcing an ex-employee to drop charges

A friend's manager recently fired a coworker for no apparent reason, even though most people in the office considered the ex-coworker to be hard-working and efficient. After some time the ex-coworker ...
18
votes
5answers
4k views

Group manager threw me under the bus to save her friend

I am at a bit of a loss as to what to do. Back story: I was put on a project that was far behind and was very low developer quality adhering to no set of standards or practices. The project was not ...
16
votes
11answers
8k views

Invoices (owed to me) always late; also late on deliverables (me to them); past monies disputes; being strongarmed

Let me expand on the title as it is directly relevant: I am 26 and this is my first contracting experience, being contracted by this company. The only stipulation is $70 an hour. This is in Australia,...
14
votes
1answer
2k views

'Most expensive toy in town' - conflict between manager and his boss

An acquaintance of mine - a manager high up the food chain of an international company - recently approached me for advice in a delicate situation between him and his boss. As their business has done ...
13
votes
4answers
2k views

What is a good process to follow for resolving concerns with a bad manager?

Regarding situations like having a good job with a bad manager, I have read advice like "never complain at work", or "you can't get rid of your manager". So my question is, what is a process to ...
12
votes
6answers
1k views

How to demonstrate technical leadership skills in a situation where my inputs may not be welcome?

I work at a large software enterprise. Multiple orgs, multiple teams, huge hierarchy of managers and managers of managers. I am a fairly senior individual contributor with more than a decade of ...
12
votes
3answers
617 views

How to respond better to criticism or challenge?

My line managers are in agreement that I present a natural flair for sales, marketing and personal relationships. I can present engagingly to an audience of 400 persons or more and I can build strong ...
12
votes
2answers
3k views

How to handle a coworker's breath odor? [duplicate]

I work in an office of 6 or 7 people a day. I absolutely like everyone and it is a really nice place (seriously). I want to stay here a long time and continue working with the same people. I have a ...
11
votes
5answers
3k views

My new job gave me a Macbook for work, but I have no idea how to use one [duplicate]

I recently landed a great job in software development. The only problem is they gave me a Macbook. However, I have zero experience using Mac. At home I use Linux and at my current job, I use a ...
11
votes
3answers
4k views

Stop engineer from planning “bully projects”

I work for a enginering company where a few senior engineers got into a large fight that caused a lot of concern. The more senior engineer "stone walled" the not as senior engineer apparently, and the ...
9
votes
8answers
3k views

Confronting a colleague about a sexist comment

I am a (female) IT student working in an IT company. So far I enjoy work, I get along well with my colleagues and the office atmosphere is friendly. Last week although, I overheard a conversation in ...
9
votes
5answers
5k views

Colleague is starting to become awkward to work with

I am in charge of delivery and operations, any issues the team have when helping me deliver work have to go through me, I then bring it to the attention to my boss. My colleague, a developer lately ...
9
votes
2answers
33k views

How to deal with lying co-worker who misrepresents issues or makes up scenarios

I've come in contact with a situation recently at work where a co-worker I formerly worked with in an old position has been misrepresenting or creating tension by lying about situations of contact ...
9
votes
1answer
1k views

Someone from my office gave negative review of company and posted wrong things about my character

A guy from my company posted a bad review of our company on Mouthshut where he wrote bad things about the company and named some female employees including me saying they do prostitution. I was ...
8
votes
3answers
1k views

How can I deal with a conflict between my two senior techs that is affecting the entire team?

I manage a small webcast production team of volunteers. On a purely technical level, I would rank them in the top 10% of teams in our niche. Because we are small and volunteer, everyone has been ...
8
votes
2answers
2k views

Helping someone who has antagonized her colleagues [closed]

I work as a developer in the web/mobile department of a big org. We have developers divided in teams, we have team leads, and we have project leaders. There’s a “new” project leader who is having ...
8
votes
3answers
725 views

How do you deal with coworkers who don't like you on a personal level? [closed]

What is a good way to professionally work with people who give the vibe of disliking you on a personal level? Is it a good idea to ask what bug got up someone's behind and died, or should you just ...
7
votes
2answers
1k views

How do I get my boss to understand that I won't be able to attend a required session to visit a tranquility retreat?

I'm a 41-year-old single mom of one, with a 15-year-old daughter, Becky (not her real name). Becky has Asperger's Syndrome, diagnosed aged 8. She can't fully live independently and has some issues ...
7
votes
1answer
683 views

Metaphorically banished at work

I am currently employed in the US as a felon with a fairly specialized technical skillset who was lucky to have found employment after many years of search. I was hired with the help of an executive ...
6
votes
3answers
770 views

How to handle a coworker who feels rejected [closed]

The situation goes as follows: The company you work for has a "Leadership Program" that is by invitation only. You were selected for it by the president of the company, but meanwhile your coworker, ...
6
votes
3answers
848 views

I'm getting personal insults as a response to set up collaboration with former system developer, what should I do?

So, we are an NGO and we develop the new IT system for it on a voluntary basis that our members will use. It is a must for us, as people are not satisfied at all with the old system. Nobody has any ...
5
votes
3answers
935 views

Getting new boss with no experience in the field

I'm getting a new boss (for several unknown reasons I was not promoted to this position, although I have the skills and experience), who does not have any specific experience in the field which he ...
5
votes
4answers
2k views

Colleagues who ignore the advice of experts

What is an effective strategy for working with individuals who have very little experience in a specific domain (they may be experts in their own domain), but still reject input from a subject matter ...
5
votes
3answers
1k views

Manager furious because I uploaded my resume on a job site

I made a new account at a job-search website and uploaded my resume to it. I received a call the next day from my manager: he was very angry, disappointed etc... He made a lot of comments to make me ...