Questions tagged [conflict]

Questions relating to disagreement or arguments between two parties

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29
votes
9answers
9k views

Senior engineer suddenly unwilling to do extra work they used to do after being denied promotion

I'm a team lead. One of our senior engineers, Uli, is part of a team of about 7 people that were tasked with steering the company to increased profitability (lots of work involving automation). His ...
56
votes
7answers
8k views

Responding to political doxxing

Today I was approached by my direct manager, warning me that the company has been approached by an unidentified person with some accusation with regards to my political preferences. No further details ...
-4
votes
2answers
206 views

Is it appropriate for a leader to give advices but with trivial reasons?

I was reporting to a manager on a very technical proposal. While I was describing my solution the manager interrupted saying a trick I used seemed implausible. Then I responded to him with a why. ...
4
votes
5answers
739 views

How do I objectively calculate and pay colleagues and myself for time spent working on our startup?

Background: I and two other colleagues founded a start-up company a number of years ago. We’ve spent a lot of time over the years building our product and the business and we expect to start earning ...
3
votes
2answers
2k views

Should I bring in CEO where a junior software engineer was hired in position of senior, and I am risking termination due to lack of collaboration?

I was hired at the beginning of April by a Swiss company as Senior WPF engineer, and because of COVID-19 lockdown was unable to be registered as permanent, so they hired me as a contractor for two ...
38
votes
7answers
7k views

When should you go to HR vs. your manager with regards to an issue with another employee?

I had a previous role where I was having a problem with a disruptive, socially unaware colleague, and ended up asking HR about how best to handle it. We had a solid talk and it was discussed that I ...
85
votes
13answers
16k views

Mass resignation (including boss), boss's boss asks for handover of work, boss asks not to. What to do?

I am in a really awkward situation. I work in a small subsidiary company whose parent company is overseas. The parent company is in Singapore and owns our company here in Vietnam. We are completely ...
5
votes
4answers
758 views

I've been given knowingly conflicting instructions by my direct supervisor and their supervisor

There is conflict in my workplace that is much higher up than me. I am a receptionist/admin person in a small branch of a large organisation. As a result of this situation, I have been given ...
3
votes
1answer
356 views

What does it show the interviewer if you do not have specific examples of handling conflict with colleagues [duplicate]

Whenever I'm faced with the question on how I've handled conflict in the past, I struggle to find past examples of this happening with a direct report, a peer or even a senior. What does that say ...
-4
votes
1answer
236 views

Is it a valid strategy at workplace to select the people you work and comunicate with and avoid the rest?

I am closing on my 20 years working as IT. I am above average skilled and loud enough to be able to gain focus, raise through the ranks and then fall. Have done it several times :) I have had ...
0
votes
3answers
959 views

Should I apply for a position for which I'm qualified, but is being unethically “saved” for someone else?

I work in the public sector (US) in scientific research. I have been in my current position for over 10 years and have done well, working on challenging projects, developing good solutions, building ...
36
votes
9answers
11k views

How do I conduct myself when dealing with a coworker who provided me with bad data and yet keeps pushing responsibility for bad results onto me?

Some background will help me explain myself better - I maintain a software system that is used by the sales team. A sales person enters some data, then some complicated computations are done, and a ...
1
vote
2answers
466 views

How to react if the team accepts you as leader but the managment tells you to back off?

i have been doing this project recently where I had relative difficult start with a team , but at one point it worked and the team started to accept me as a leader. Not a leader like "team lead&...
2
votes
2answers
1k views

Coworker says disgusting things so I stopped talking to him. Now he's demanding to know why I'm being quiet and not talking?

A bit of a follow up to Decided to report coworker for his consistent offensive "jokes". What to expect? I have a coworker who says really disgusting and obscene things at work. I was going ...
0
votes
2answers
610 views

What is a good way to complain on a retrospective meeting?

Hi I had a following case - a JIra issue with broken flow with regards of To Do / Selected for development / In Progress / Done. The result was that all the tooling around the JIra - boards reports ...
5
votes
7answers
1k views

Should I confront coworker over behavior [closed]

There is a group of people at work I call the Pack. Every few months or so the Pack targets a victim and starts a whisper campaign. Sometimes the victim is forced out of the company sometimes they ...
7
votes
2answers
940 views

Dealing with hostility from ex-teammate newly promoted to lead

I have been working in a team with 3 other developers, reporting to a tech lead who departed as of very recently. Afterwards, we started reporting to the most senior teammate who was promoted to fill ...
10
votes
2answers
2k views

Dealing with the fallout of a work related lie

TL;DR: I lied to a co-worker in an email by removing content from emails that I forwarded. Looking to find a path to regaining their trust. How do I continue to work in close proximity, whilst there ...
1
vote
1answer
275 views

After company restructuring. how could I assert the type of role I want without risking redundancy?

Question: I have already made it clear verbally what I want in my career and asked to speak in a few weeks' time to discuss this. Apart from job hunting elsewhere, is there anything else I can do?
3
votes
3answers
747 views

Is it normal for people to take things personally when rebuked/disagreed upon in a startup environment?

I've had experience with two co-founders (from two different startups) name John and Adam. Both of them 'rage quit' the company when I did not agree with them. John got so upset with me (the founder) ...
166
votes
15answers
41k views

How can I deal with troublesome Professional Engineer?

I currently manage a team of quite a few engineers in Canada. Things normally run smoothly, but we've had a serious problem with a senior engineer as of late. This engineer is the sole engineer on ...
5
votes
4answers
2k views

On exit interview was told not to say name of company/client I worked for

I was contacted by someone offering me paid work. Call him Bob. Bob has a sole proprietorship, call it X. His only client who he works full time for as a contractor is Y. Y gave him a budget to hire ...
8
votes
4answers
1k views

Writing a negative annual review (with negative comments about the reviewer)

I love the company that I work at; however, since the integration of colleagues from a business that we bought (around a year ago) the working conditions have really taken a turn for the worse. I have ...
5
votes
1answer
903 views

How do I tell my boss that his contributions to projects are terrible?

I make lesson plans for a small education business. It's small enough that my boss is the owner of the company and tends to directly contribute and make changes to these lessons. My problem is that a ...
68
votes
5answers
13k views

How do I deal with a team member who regularly makes breaking changes?

I'm a senior developer in a mid-sized business. We are split into multiple sub-teams with specific roles for each. My allocated team's responsibility is for the day to day running of services and bug ...
1
vote
5answers
700 views

How to react to a colleague that subtly puts you down in meeting?

A few important bits of context: I am a team leader for a team of 4 + 1 temp. We have a few projects (reports, analyses for our department) in our pipeline and our director mostly lets me prioritize ...
132
votes
12answers
25k views

How do I tell my colleagues that the codebase they've built is a total mess and their practices are ancient?

The situation For a few months, I've been working with a new team in a new company. The company offers some web services and the team's role is to develop and maintain those services. Problem #1: ...
74
votes
7answers
23k views

I suspect my coworker is trying to take revenge. How do my career and I survive an extra few weeks of working together?

A few months ago, I was temporarily (until the end of this year) put on another team. There is one other developer, and we've been struggling in our day-to-day interactions from day one. He's not used ...
-1
votes
2answers
523 views

Colleague is negative and does not acknowledge me

I have the following situation. I am new to a team but not new to the project have worked in it for couple of years but I was away on different assignment again for 3 years. Now I am back in new team ...
5
votes
2answers
872 views

How to deal with underperforming Product Manager

I am a developer in a big tech company. It is been 1.5 year since our Product Manager (PM) joined my team. Since then, he's been performing bad, and since then, my manager and myself have been giving ...
0
votes
4answers
520 views

Dealing with condescending arguments from colleagues [duplicate]

How do you deal with condescending arguments when arguing with colleagues? I mean with arguments like: "In my N years experience ... you will learn when you get that experience ..." "...
0
votes
1answer
597 views

My senior colleague ignores me

I am a junior software developer. I joined one of the big tech companies a year ago, immediately after graduating. I joined a team that has one developer, he is a senior dev. In the first half of ...
1
vote
1answer
501 views

How can I minimize the damage of my PhD advisor's bad recommendation when applying for industry jobs?

This question is about the power of PhD advisors on industry job (non-research) applications. I did not get along well with my former PhD advisor. I was able to defend and graduate; however, I have ...
24
votes
11answers
6k views

How to deal with a HR rep that is making me feel super uncomfortable?

I am currently working as an intern software developer at a startup, which consists of the three founders, a HR rep that just joined the company three months ago, another intern, and me who has been ...
7
votes
2answers
621 views

Was I wrong asking my boss whether my co-worker needed to get checked at Employee Health?

My co-worker just flew back from vacations in Ft. Lauderdale and had previously said she needed to get checked at Employee Health before returning to work, but she just showed up. I asked her ...
14
votes
1answer
2k views

'Most expensive toy in town' - conflict between manager and his boss

An acquaintance of mine - a manager high up the food chain of an international company - recently approached me for advice in a delicate situation between him and his boss. As their business has done ...
0
votes
3answers
439 views

How can I deal with irascible, unprofessional manager?

I work for a large-size engineering firm, in the R&D department. I am working there from 6 months by now, and it is my first work after my MSc degree. I like (unsure now) both the company and the ...
3
votes
1answer
501 views

How Should I Handle a Coworker/Friend who is Upset with Me?

I found out about two days ago, that a coworker/friend has been upset with me for months. A few of us were planning to go out after work with our team so we asked [Joe] if he wanted to join us, but ...
7
votes
2answers
541 views

What to do (if anything) about a desk neighbor on my project who verbally and physically expresses anger and frustration? And I feel intimidated

I'm part of my own team but the nature of it is that I sometimes get "hired out" to work with another team in the same company as a sort of subject matter expert. Today and for the last 3 months or so ...
19
votes
6answers
3k views

How to answer “Who did this?”

I work as a software developer (remote) for a small company. They are not an IT-company. They just have a piece of software that needs to be maintained and modified regularly with different changes. ...
64
votes
16answers
15k views

How to deal with non-stop callers in the service desk

For the last three months, I've been working in an IT department with first- and second-level IT support. This differs from a call center where someone picks up the phone and quickly creates a ticket ...
13
votes
7answers
2k views

Important ex-volunteer demanding the humiliation of former colleague

I am the "head volunteer" for a "patch" of Churches in a group of 3 neighboring cities. My job is to encourage members of our churches and parents/teens of families attending our schools to take part ...
1
vote
1answer
530 views

Furniture layout, disagreement with officemate

I am in problem. A month before I got job, I was allocated an office. It is a shared office for 3 persons. Everyone is assigned with a table and cupbourd. After a month I changed some setting in ...
-3
votes
2answers
299 views

Convert a technical conflict into HR case

I have one conflict that is dressed as a technical issue which I believe is an actual HR issue. Involved in the technical conflict resolution are the project manager and the department lead. But the ...
2
votes
4answers
1k views

Conflict with older employee

An older colleague, a woman with 30+ years of experience as a cobol developer has been escalating me every week for the last nearly 2 months. She finds different pretexts for the same issue again and ...
1
vote
2answers
515 views

Hired as a manager to effect change; existing co-worker capable but lacks 'drive' to learn and build. How to build the relationship we need?

I have recently started a new job, where I am now in essence the Supply Chain Manager for a small company that has several locations across my province (Canada). Two of the people that work for this ...
1
vote
2answers
563 views

Super PMO taking credit for the System Design that I worked on from scratch for weeks [duplicate]

I work in a software outsourcing company. Recently, my manager pulled me out of my project to work on a system design document for a new application from scratch. The client is from a very well-known ...
148
votes
10answers
30k views

What to do when during a meeting client's people start to (physically) fight with each other?

I work on a project that requires many on-site meetings at the client's location, with client people from different departments. These departments can be considered as closed silos, where everyone ...
19
votes
8answers
5k views

When should I disclose an ongoing relationship with someone who is in a legal battle with my employer?

My girlfriend and I worked together for 2 years under the same boss. Her and his professional relationship started to go "south". In the end, it became unbearable for both and together with HR they ...
25
votes
5answers
8k views

Team lead unhappy to lead team [closed]

I am the team lead of a team with quite a diverse background in both age and knowledge. 2 COBOL developers around 60 years old, 1 business person, one project manager, and 3 Java developers. I am the ...

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