Questions tagged [relationships]
Questions related to personal relationships in a work context.
377
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Cold-messaged by a colleague's spouse to get mentorship
I've recently received a cold message from a colleague's spouse, writing that they've heard my "name from <my colleague's name> over the meetings", asking for mentorship to help them (...
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2
votes
2
answers
1k
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How to deal with a client who is constantly distrustful towards me?
I work as a freelance web developer. There is one important client that I'm currently doing a large project for. Most of the time he is easy going and friendly, but there have been many times he ...
- 37
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4
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1k
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How should I let the custodian know that he needs to stop mopping our floors with dirty water?
I have noticed that the new custodian in our workplace often mops our floors with dirty water. The water in the mop bucket is usually dark and it sometimes smells bad. I have never seen him stop ...
- 137
2
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2
answers
764
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Would I be jeopardizing a working relationship if I voiced my displeasure with a coworkers actions?
I work in the United States. I have been working with a co-worker, Jane, for 9 months. We do similar work. She has over 30 years of experience on the job. She is an invaluable resource. I can ask her ...
- 2,447
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4
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How can I ask my senior male manager to coffee with me?
I am intern in the niche finance firm where everyone knows each other because it is so small. He is 10 years older than me and my senior but not my direct boss. I will leave the firm soon, in less ...
user139608
-3
votes
1
answer
322
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Professional relationship and friendship with the same person
I live in a city with very difficult (and expensive) rent situation. I rent an apartment and I have some loans to pay off. To share the costs (and to make some profit), I decided to look for a ...
- 103
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1
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266
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Workplace relationships [closed]
My fiancé and I have worked together directly in the company we are with for a while now, and we disclosed our relationship to them in the very beginning. Can they after a year of knowing we were ...
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1k
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Is it reasonable to be frustrated about being siloed in a project?
I transitioned to a new company as an software engineer 2. I was put on a single project months ago where the problem statement was given to me, but it was up to me to shape the problem, do the ...
- 207
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4
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526
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How to keep good professional relationship with manager whom I like
I have a team lead who is very rude and unprofessional. I joined a new company and was mentally abused a lot before I complained to my manager about him. The team lead has been promoted to my manager ...
- 128
3
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3
answers
1k
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How much should I help the new person in my old job role?
I work for a very large organization.
I left one subset of the organization, such as a division, we'll call A, and went to another such subset (such as division) that we'll call B.
In any event, ...
- 433
1
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4
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717
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How do I stay out of malicious gossip when co-worker keeps trying to get me to agree with her? [duplicate]
Two co-workers of mine talk about a 3rd co-worker behind her back. They feel she gets away with things that other employees do not and management doesn't do anything about it. For example, her ...
- 2,447
36
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7
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11k
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How to politely get out of a carpooling situation as the car owner [closed]
I found myself in a developing carpooling situation as a daily driver.
My colleague approached me the other day and asked if I could drop him off. He doesn't live far away from me and doesn't expect ...
- 902
-1
votes
4
answers
1k
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Manager not treating every team member equally
I am in a team of 7 including our team leader (which has both the responsibility of technical lead and line management) in a company consisting of 700 people total. We are a relatively young team with ...
- 1,789
0
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3
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921
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Team lead often directs question to coworker with less knowledge than me
Background
I work in a business intelligence team consisting of 7 people, including our team lead. It has happened quite often that our team lead (let's call him Bob) directs a question to a coworker ...
- 1,789
19
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7
answers
16k
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Should I meet my manager, in person, if he is on a business trip a 2 hour flight away from my city?
My company head office is in South Africa while I am based in Sweden. My manager sent out an email that next month he will be in France and would love to meet anyone in person for lunch or coffee.
My ...
- 3,189
3
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4
answers
938
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Build new company software on my own time? Or is that overstepping? [closed]
I started working at this company about a year ago. I work on a team that maintains their web application.
The web application was built about 20 years ago using Java Spring and is extremely outdated ...
- 805
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3
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2k
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How to deal with a manager with strong cognitive biases?
For background, I work in a small tech company (~30 people) in the United States, and I have 12 years of experience in my field. I lead (but do not manage) a team of less experienced people in my ...
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3
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988
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How to be independent at workplace while being friendly
At work places we have to stay independent to complete our services properly, right? In my new work place, there are 2 other girls, quite of my same age. So I greet them friendly and try to maintain ...
- 341
1
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5
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985
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Is it ok to openly admit that you brought a friend of yours to the company?
If I were to admit that, some people might think that it is unfair because he didn't really find the job on his own merit. On the other hand, not admitting it might look like if I were hiding ...
- 113
5
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1
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1k
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Dating a coworker with indirect relations to a direct report
This is somewhat of a weird situation to explain. I am a senior, C level executive and am dating somebody from another part of the company. There are no overlapping parts in the day to day business of ...
- 61
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2
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891
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Am I being set up for failure? Filling the gap
I started working in a FAANG company about 7 months ago as a software engineer II, and my team of 5 (including the manager who is also a tech lead) is onboarding a feature that requires engaging with ...
- 1,926
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Old foe is now my boss [closed]
Questions
1-Is there any way of arguing that gets me out of this new boss that sounds reasonable and professional?
2-How can I keep upper management informed about my dissatisfaction, even if I manage ...
anon
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1
answer
503
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How do I wean off my main vendor (who wants to be my sole vendor) over time?
I have a startup project, and my (only for now) vendor wants to be my sole vendor. I am concerned about his behaviour if I want to work with other vendors in the near future.
How do I deal with this ...
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1
answer
368
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Frequent job switches before migration to another country
Context:
I am working as a software support engineer/team leader in a non-IT company doing desktop applications. The domain I am working is geography specific i.e. the jobs are in Europe and some ...
- 701
8
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2
answers
2k
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Repairing relationship with former boss
A few introductory concepts about the organization I work for: First, it is a huge, old, very rigid and quite hierarchical organization, so, any expectation of me effecting any change in it is totally ...
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votes
6
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11k
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How should I tell my boss that I'm going away for another company?
Premise:
I'm 21, and I've started my path for my current company when I was 16 in a school internship. Then for all next years every internship or every holidays I was working for them as a software ...
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3
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888
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Should I ask a professional to refrain from contacting my company?
I am currently finishing an internship and my manager has signaled that he would like to hire me on a permanent contract. We have started talking about salary expectations and he's taking it to HR by ...
- 27
21
votes
5
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6k
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I accidentally told an offensive joke at my boss's expense in a team meeting, how do I apologise?
During a recent Zoom team meeting, we were playing a team bonding game where everyone would share a picture of themselves re-creating a favourite movie scene. Everyone was having a good natured laugh.
...
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4
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2
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638
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Who to ask about the benefits mentioned in job description and offer letter
When starting a new job, who is the correct person to ask about the benefits mentioned in the job description and offer letter, the direct manager of the new employee, the internal recruiter who ...
- 175
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4
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679
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Telling an internal recruiter that I have received an offer from another company
I have a take home assignment and an upcoming technical interview with company B after passing the previous stage. However, I received an offer from company A for an immediate start. The internal ...
- 175
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6
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1k
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Dealing with a difficult colleague not accepting my position (in an NGO setting)
I have a BA degree in computer science with a few years of professional experience. A few month ago I started working for a humanitarian NGO (with US-American origins) which is active in some lesser ...
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13
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3
answers
10k
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Colleague I "hired" watching football - am I responsible?
I'm doing an internship as a software developer in a startup. When I had the job interview they told me they always need programmers and asked me whether I know someone else from my uni who would like ...
5
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3
answers
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What is the most effective way to deal with insolent team member?
I am the leader of a tech team. One of my colleagues, who was only one grade lower than me, not only satirized and antagonized me in public but also questioned or satirized me in the work chat group ...
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2
answers
736
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Can I extend my answer to a job offer a second time without burning a bridge?
Two weeks ago, I was looking for work and I reached out to a consultant friend of mine to ask if they had any work they could send my way. It turned out, the company he's Consulting for is a long-term ...
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5
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3
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791
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Is it acceptable to ask an estranged former colleague to 'siezen' even if you previously 'duzen-ed'? [closed]
Note: My native language is English which lacks a T-V distinction
Generally, when two adult German speakers meet in the workspace, they start by 'siezen-ing' (speaking German with the use of the ...
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0
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4
answers
987
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Is manipulation a soft skill? [closed]
All my life I have been studying technical areas (hard skills) like programming, maths, statistics, German, data analysis, etc.
That makes me isolate myself to learn this stuff and now I have problems ...
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1
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3
answers
1k
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How can I improve my reactions to a coworker who irritates me?
I have been at a job for a few months now. We are a small business. I work in a small team of 3-4 people who are all on the same level : no managers except a boss who is rarely around.
I am really ...
- 59
21
votes
7
answers
43k
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How to answer the question "Do you have any relatives working with us"?
I know this is a frequently asked question, but I recently gave an interview, and a few days later I had a very brief call with HR. They asked me, "Do you have any relatives working with us?&...
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0
answers
551
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Would moving in with an indirectly lower ranked coworker be conflict of interest? [closed]
I work in the office for a college department which handles both counseling (the psychiatric kind) and disability services. Technically, they should be two seperate departments and in the past were, ...
- 67
1
vote
3
answers
985
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How can I repair the working relationship?
I have worked as a web applications developer for a small software company (10 full time employees plus two semi-retired directors) for two years. Going back, I worked in support and databases, but ...
- 131
0
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3
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2k
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Self-nominating for awards and recognition?
Perhaps this is unique to my organization (public sector, 10,000+ people), but if you want to receive recognition for your work, you need to nominate yourself for awards. Supervisors won't nominate, ...
- 1,685
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698
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Can I consider that I was be isolated or something else?
I am a Java software engineer located in Paris office. Three months ago I remote joined a team in Berlin, because one person left in the team. I meet strange thing here:
Generally speaking, if I have ...
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3
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3
answers
3k
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My spouse is applying to a job at the company I work at, how should I answer questions about him?
My spouse applied to a position at the company I work at, albeit in a completely different department. I anticipate since I was listed as a referral that I might be asked about him, but we have ...
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2
votes
2
answers
762
views
How to manage interview with friends?
I am going to apply for a firm where a mutual friend is the CEO, it is a startup though. I once had an interview with a mutual friend and i behaved casually but not too much formally but i did not ...
user122935
-1
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2
answers
526
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Urge someone in the kindest way possible
I'm asking to one of my collegue to send me a file (that He should have already sent me).
I've already asked him about this file a couple of weeks ago with something like this:
Have you got any news ...
- 109
-2
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1
answer
231
views
How to get up to speed in a new web development job when there's no documentation?
I just arrived in a company to code in PHP and MySQL and I'm trying to get familiar with the codebase.
I see the source code of the website and there is no documentation, no comments above the ...
- 19
0
votes
3
answers
927
views
How to save the situation if you've fallen out of grace with your boss?
My boss has several favorite people in the team. He tends to show it when he doesn't like somebody clearly.
I've now fallen out of grace. I was in his inner circle when I joined 6 months ago, now I'm ...
- 25
2
votes
3
answers
1k
views
Dealing with "small" issues when working for a senior person
I'm reporting to a really senior person. Most of their direct reports are higher in the hierarchy than I am.
At the same time, the culture of my organization is sometimes difficult to navigate. To ...
- 49
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votes
2
answers
337
views
How to avoid conflict with manager when he complains for situations beyond my remit?
I am part of a small team for a big region.
Other teams, smaller or not much bigger, operate in other, smaller regions.
Together, we cover "the whole world".
I am working on projects focused ...
user38290
86
votes
7
answers
14k
views
How do I evaluate a manager I have a negative opinion of?
I am part of a team of 5 software development engineers in a large multinational company.
Last week there was a screw up. A customer escalation came in on Monday, my manager was specifically tagged in ...
- 593