Questions tagged [relationships]

Questions related to personal relationships in a work context.

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7
votes
5answers
1k views

Company Christmas party coming soon, but I am new to the company and having panic attacks. How can I handle this?

I’m new to a role (started 4 weeks ago) and our work Christmas party is soon. Although I’ve spoken to most of the people I’m yet to be ‘in a group’ and the thought of going to a party where I’ll be on ...
1
vote
5answers
662 views

Reviewing old code database, how to start interacting with the dev team?

TL, DR: There was this software product being developed in my company, I needed to review a lot of the codebase. How do I talk to the development team? The not-so-short version: Due to several ...
0
votes
3answers
713 views

Relationship with former colleagues

Recently I have been receiving private messages from two former colleagues whom I worked closely with while was working as an intern at my previous workplace. The first guy was my supervisor, he ...
5
votes
1answer
892 views

How to handle Social Engineered relationships after Red Team engagements? [closed]

I'm learning to become a Red Teamer, which simulates attacks by adversaries from multiple angles: Digital/Cyber, Physical and Social. This questions focuses on the Social Engineering aspect of Red ...
37
votes
10answers
24k views

HR trying to sabotage my wife's work because we're married [closed]

TLDR; My wife got a 1 month trial as a product manager and tester for a new product I'm directly designing and developing. HR hates the fact that we're married and is trying to seat her separate from ...
-6
votes
2answers
454 views

Secular Holidays Conundrum

My coworkers are doing Halloween and Christmas at work, I'm a Messianic Jew, how do I avoid ruining my relationship with them?
1
vote
2answers
606 views

What to do if you are unintentionaly subject of favoritism?

I have the following situation at work. I am part of a team with people having different background age-wise and business wise. Since the beginning of the project It happened so that I took the role ...
1
vote
3answers
402 views

How to avoid a proposed role by an HR but still be considered for another?

I am looking for a job and I've been contacting a senior manager of a firm directly. He is quite interested by my profile and forwarded my resume to his HR and the person right below him that covers ...
6
votes
2answers
3k views

Concerning a relationship in the team [closed]

This is about a situation that isn't strictly an employed workplace, but is similar. I am on project team at a university. It is supposedly a 'professional environment', though as we are all ...
0
votes
2answers
803 views

Advice on defusing a tense situation after disrespectful behaviour from a colleague [closed]

This happened to me today and I'm still trying to digest it. To give you some context, I'm working on IT at a company with several branches across Europe. I don't hold any position of responsibility ...
5
votes
3answers
909 views

How can I learn to navigate office politics?

I've had several jobs post-graduation already and whereas I always exceed expectations when it comes to my performance (i.e. shown expertise/ skills in the field I'm active in), I feel I could work on ...
0
votes
2answers
685 views

Asking project manager to put me in another project

Sorry for my english first. I am a programmer and I am working in a big outsourcing company, that provides programmers for other companies. Right now I am in a really bad project without any prospects ...
2
votes
2answers
387 views

How to deal with feeling left out at work? [closed]

I feel really lonely at work. At times I really just feel like my coworkers are only interacting with me because they have to. Here's the situation: I don't have any friends. So I think that might ...
2
votes
1answer
755 views

Crush on Cubicle neighbor from different team; how should I proceed? [closed]

I have a crush on a girl same age as me whose cubicle literally shares the same wall as mine. She is in a different team. For a couple of weeks now, we have never spoken a single word, despite having ...
15
votes
3answers
1k views

Romantically rejected a more senior coworker; how can I protect myself?

A coworker recently asked me out in a romantic way and I turned them down. I don't work directly with this person, or report to them. They're not on my team. They are older and more senior. I don't ...
7
votes
2answers
926 views

My co-worker aggressively tries to supervise me. Nobody appointed him. What are my options? [duplicate]

The co-worker who works for longer in the company is aggressively trying to supervise me. He constantly attempts to make decisions for me, requires to redo the completed tasks, insists on using ...
54
votes
7answers
21k views

How to reclaim personal item I've lent to the office without burning bridges?

We had a company issued service mobile phone to be used for emergencies and office related texts and calls. 5 months ago our supervisor's personal mobile phone got damaged and he decided to use the ...
4
votes
1answer
364 views

Is it appropriate to ask management to give me an evaluation?

I've been working at my new Software Development job for almost four months now. I've been doing the best I can, and also working hard to go above and beyond every now and then. However, I'd like to ...
5
votes
1answer
1k views

Colleagues with less experience being promoted ahead

My (previous) colleague feels as though she has been passed up for multiple promotions. Her junior colleagues are being promoted, but she is not. What advice or guidance can I offer her? First thing ...
1
vote
1answer
259 views

Phrasing an apology/ correcting possible misunderstanding

A couple of weeks ago I met a highly respected person in my field working in a C-suite position, during the smoking time outside, we chatted a bit, and he was interested in what do I have to offer, so ...
-4
votes
1answer
359 views

Would it be acceptable like if you don't want to wear a t-shirt for a team video shoot in a large organization for some reasons? [closed]

The full details, if you want to read, are written under this question In short, due to privacy reasons, possible reactions by people who know me, my lifestyle, my background, my shape and my ...
2
votes
3answers
1k views

I got a new job, and a friend turned hostile because of it. How to manage friendships professional network? [closed]

A friend of mine used to be a few steps ahead of my in his career. I was very happy for him, and I saw him as a trustworthy person and a future leader. He got into senior management in some startup, ...
1
vote
2answers
560 views

How to protect myself in a departmental conflict?

I apologise if my language is a little unclear on this question, I've changed a few details to make the situation more generic. I'm a Software Widget Expert for department A at a medium/large ...
4
votes
4answers
844 views

Should I point out my colleague's mistakes in this situation? [duplicate]

Last week I was assigned a project by our manager. I started it and worked on it in between some priority work which came up. The project was stuck. So our manager and I decided to forward the ...
117
votes
10answers
30k views

Dating a Former Employee

I'm a senior, C level executive at a relatively small company (~75 employees). A while ago, I became very close to a direct report. We began spending more time together outside of work; first in ...
6
votes
2answers
2k views

Is it wise to reveal that I have started dating an intern with my company?

I have a question regarding what should I do if I have a relationship with a colleague that just got hired. The 'story' so far is this: I've been working at this company for 3 years. It is a small one,...
24
votes
4answers
10k views

How do I handle a potential work/personal life conflict as the manager of one of my friends professionally? [closed]

I have a rather peculiar situation. My wife and I have a couple who we are friends with, and recently the woman (let’s call her Jane) was hired in my company and works in my team (I’m her manager!). ...
33
votes
4answers
15k views

My boss doesn't want me to have a side project [closed]

It all started back in February when I decided to start an e-commerce store. When my boss learned about it, he started talking less and less to me. Some days he doesn't talk to me at all, like he ...
7
votes
3answers
1k views

My co-workers do not invite me regulary to coffee, after the work

After work, my co-workers usually go to grab a coffee or some drinks. They all go together, and I was invited only a couple of times. I have been employed there for a couple of months now. I would ...
78
votes
15answers
26k views

Friend wants my recommendation but I don't want to give it to him

I met my friend in my first year of college (Computer Science), so I can tell that I know how well he works and how knowledgeable he is. He's a good friend, we chat occasionally, meet up to have ...
131
votes
10answers
16k views

Do I need to be arrogant to get ahead? [closed]

A colleague of mine is very good at PR and branding himself and does this by communicating to the whole world his successes no matter how small they are. He does this in a very arrogant way, by making ...
0
votes
3answers
826 views

Handling the aftermath of traffic accident with colleague

A bit of context: I had about four months ago a motorbike accident with a car who was at fault (cut me off). During the time I was waiting for the emergency services to arrive and take care of me, I ...
4
votes
4answers
1k views

Shall I mention to my future employer that I am leaving my current company because I am dating my coworker?

I am working at a company that has less than 100 people for 6 months. I started dating one of my coworker in my team for a few months. I decided to leave my current position because she feels it is ...
3
votes
4answers
1k views

How to handle senior member of my organization who seems to think I'm not very smart after conversations at team lunches

Background: I am a junior developer at a large software company. The person in question is a senior PM who reports to my skip-level manager (my manager's manager). My manager has worked with the ...
0
votes
1answer
243 views

Reminding someone to send me their resume?

My company is looking to hire and I told a former classmate (I'll call him Jake) about it since I feel he is qualified. He sounded interested in the position (it would be in a different department ...
16
votes
4answers
2k views

I come off as an expert in writing, but In person, nobody takes me seriously, and it is affecting my career, how can I fix this?

I have considerable knowledge in the business and technology of my field (supply chain and planning), from 7 years experience and from having a Ph.D in a closely related field. Although my colleagues ...
9
votes
4answers
1k views

My team mate is talking trash about me behind my back with my manager

I am leading a team of 5 and there is 1 manager who is above/supervising us. One of my team-mates I get along well with; she behaves well and I discuss personal stuff and share jokes with her. ...
1
vote
3answers
440 views

What are the mainly used policies to evaluated interns/juniors besides personal interactions and/or interests?

Context I’m a senior team leader and technical project coordinator at a medium size company (650 employees). The company was public until 9 or 10 years ago, when it was transformed in a (formally) ...
27
votes
7answers
15k views

When should I tell my boss that the person I recommended for a job is my partner?

TL;DR: My currently-unemployed partner is looking for a job. I recommended them for a position in my company. I discovered afterwards that they would work in my department should they get the ...
17
votes
7answers
2k views

Cultural favouritism in the workplace

This is in relation to the software industry in Australia. I am noticing a repeated and consistent attitude stemming from Indians towards those of non-Indian background in the industry. Examples: ...
154
votes
17answers
36k views

Is it inappropriate to invite all my coworkers except for one person to a private event?

I work in a fairly small department, I have 8 coworkers. 7 of them are great, we're good friends, and I love spending time with them - we hang out outside of work often, but usually in groups of 3-4. ...
9
votes
3answers
1k views

Drunkenly said something offensive to a coworker

So. Christmas dinner office party. Drank way too much too fast. Told a coworker he reminded me of a cow, but I didn't mean anything bad by it. He has this sort of "cow looking at the cars from behind ...
-3
votes
2answers
222 views

Management Relationship [closed]

I am in need of some perspective. Background My boss and I have a good relationship overall. She has told me several times that she is very good at reading people and situations. Several people ...
4
votes
2answers
150 views

How to foster relationships with managers that are geographically distributed

I'm a manager of managers - and I have a counterpart on the other side of the ocean with ~9 hours offset. I'm wondering how I can foster the relationship between those managers that are located here ...
2
votes
4answers
1k views

Colleague left me with his unfinished work [closed]

TL;DR: By the end of the day, a colleague of mine told the high level boss that she must go home and that I can handle the task by myself. While the task had nothing to do with me except for her ...
8
votes
3answers
760 views

Senior colleagues are deriding my work

Let me give you some context before. I'm working in a very well-known international company as a DevOps Engineer with 6 months of experience. I feel so grateful and lucky to develop my skills and ...
4
votes
6answers
1k views

Hiring Significant Others

I work for a very small company: 4 employees including myself. We recently let go of our warehouse person. My customer service mentioned to me her boyfriend was unemployed and still looking for work. ...
-4
votes
2answers
437 views

Why isn't everyone as excited as I am to work at my company? [closed]

I work at one of the most (if not the most) well-regarded companies on the planet, in terms of technical reputation as well as workplace benefits. Orientation was great, and I was fully bought into ...
107
votes
12answers
27k views

Dealing with attraction to my boss [closed]

I'm a recent college grad who finally got my first real programming job. For better or for worse, I am extremely attracted to my boss and have quickly developed feelings for her. This seemed awesome ...
72
votes
10answers
21k views

Coworker reviewing code too late in process

Over the summer I changed jobs from a big company as a senior engineer to a way smaller company as a principal engineer. Now I oversee about 20 jr-to-mid-level engineers working on 3 different ...