Questions tagged [relationships]

Questions related to personal relationships in a work context.

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0
votes
3answers
650 views

How can I improve my reactions to a coworker who irritates me?

I have been at a job for a few months now. We are a small business. I work in a small team of 3-4 people who are all on the same level : no managers except a boss who is rarely around. I am really ...
21
votes
7answers
15k views

How to answer the question “Do you have any relatives working with us”?

I know this is a frequently asked question, but I recently gave an interview, and a few days later I had a very brief call with HR. They asked me, "Do you have any relatives working with us?&...
2
votes
0answers
525 views

Would moving in with an indirectly lower ranked coworker be conflict of interest? [closed]

I work in the office for a college department which handles both counseling (the psychiatric kind) and disability services. Technically, they should be two seperate departments and in the past were, ...
1
vote
3answers
872 views

How can I repair the working relationship?

I have worked as a web applications developer for a small software company (10 full time employees plus two semi-retired directors) for two years. Going back, I worked in support and databases, but ...
0
votes
3answers
313 views

Self-nominating for awards and recognition?

Perhaps this is unique to my organization (public sector, 10,000+ people), but if you want to receive recognition for your work, you need to nominate yourself for awards. Supervisors won't nominate, ...
0
votes
3answers
656 views

Can I consider that I was be isolated or something else?

I am a Java software engineer located in Paris office. Three months ago I remote joined a team in Berlin, because one person left in the team. I meet strange thing here: Generally speaking, if I have ...
2
votes
3answers
817 views

My spouse is applying to a job at the company I work at, how should I answer questions about him?

My spouse applied to a position at the company I work at, albeit in a completely different department. I anticipate since I was listed as a referral that I might be asked about him, but we have ...
2
votes
2answers
699 views

How to manage interview with friends?

I am going to apply for a firm where a mutual friend is the CEO, it is a startup though. I once had an interview with a mutual friend and i behaved casually but not too much formally but i did not ...
-1
votes
2answers
503 views

Urge someone in the kindest way possible

I'm asking to one of my collegue to send me a file (that He should have already sent me). I've already asked him about this file a couple of weeks ago with something like this: Have you got any news ...
-2
votes
1answer
222 views

How to get up to speed in a new web development job when there's no documentation?

I just arrived in a company to code in PHP and MySQL and I'm trying to get familiar with the codebase. I see the source code of the website and there is no documentation, no comments above the ...
0
votes
3answers
624 views

How to save the situation if you've fallen out of grace with your boss?

My boss has several favorite people in the team. He tends to show it when he doesn't like somebody clearly. I've now fallen out of grace. I was in his inner circle when I joined 6 months ago, now I'm ...
2
votes
3answers
999 views

Dealing with “small” issues when working for a senior person

I'm reporting to a really senior person. Most of their direct reports are higher in the hierarchy than I am.  At the same time, the culture of my organization is sometimes difficult to navigate. To ...
-3
votes
2answers
321 views

How to avoid conflict with manager when he complains for situations beyond my remit?

I am part of a small team for a big region. Other teams, smaller or not much bigger, operate in other, smaller regions. Together, we cover "the whole world". I am working on projects focused ...
86
votes
7answers
14k views

How do I evaluate a manager I have a negative opinion of?

I am part of a team of 5 software development engineers in a large multinational company. Last week there was a screw up. A customer escalation came in on Monday, my manager was specifically tagged in ...
-3
votes
2answers
614 views

Change of the hairstyle had dramatic effects on personal relations [closed]

To provide some background I work in tech job which overlaps with academia, think mix of college, software and IT company, I`ve been quite fond of horizontal mobility, flexibility and ability to ...
54
votes
8answers
10k views

Since my boss find out my hobby, our relationship worsened, how to improve it?

I'm working as a developer/database admin and, until a few days ago, everything was great working with my boss (workload was fine, we trusted each other, meetings were shorts and constructive, ...
2
votes
2answers
367 views

How to handle turmoil in company's ERGs

There is a policy at my company that says all individuals are welcome to join or attend any ERG (Employee Resource Group), even if they don't belong to that race/gender. Even though I am not Black, I ...
4
votes
2answers
398 views

How to build relationships while onboarding remotely with a traditionally non-remote team?

I am starting a new position at a company that is normally co-located in the same office. However, due to Covid-19 the team has moved to a remote set-up and I will be joining the team remotely for a ...
12
votes
4answers
2k views

How can I deal with a supervisor that constantly blames the previous manager that hired me initially?

I work in a university in the US. I was hired by a person that left last year for a better position somewhere else. My previous manager invited me to join him in his new position and have a role equal ...
8
votes
5answers
2k views

Can a supervisor forbid me from being friends or talking with a co-worker?

Summary: friend at work is a poor performer, my manager tells me they are bad influence and I should stop hanging out with them. I work as a teacher and am a union member. I have one co-worker who I ...
5
votes
4answers
2k views

How do I deal with a co-worker that keeps making the same jokes, and same remarks?

Basically, I work in a small company that usually will have 4-5 fulltime workers at a time in the office. There are separate rooms in the office, and I share a room with a co-worker who I will call '...
0
votes
3answers
553 views

Strange line manager/colleague behaviour how to react?

It happened few weeks ago I was discussing with a colleague (name him Paul) about work, the conversation was about plans for a project we are both involved in. Paul was extremely confused and worried ...
6
votes
5answers
2k views

Does the general advice to not date coworkers also apply to employees of companies your company does business with?

I understand that usually, it's not considered a good idea to date coworkers, because it can lead to personal problems spilling over into the office and negatively affecting the company. My question ...
24
votes
4answers
10k views

Found a co-worker on a dating website. How do I approach them?

I found a co-worker on a dating site. I've seen her around before but have never spoken and never really had any interest. However, after reading her profile, I am interested in pursuit, but am not ...
2
votes
2answers
498 views

How to get along with a manager who loads the dice?

Our manager thinks other employees are competitors for his current position. He loads the dice against his subordinates. We're afraid to do our best in work. On the other hand, one whose performance ...
-2
votes
2answers
693 views

Can I press charges if a coworker says he wishes my death? [closed]

I have a toxic coworker. A few days ago, he said he had 2 types of wishes : good ones and bad ones. Among those bad ones is that he wants me to die Can I press charges for such a statement ?
22
votes
9answers
8k views

How do I ask co-worker out on a date?

I have developed strong liking towards my co-worker for the past week since I met her and I cannot stop thinking about her. Although we only chat about work during work I want to ask her on a date. ...
3
votes
2answers
573 views

Recruiter knows I worked at competitor and that my father is a very relevant person is this market

So I am doing a recruitment process in a great company - Company A - which is a competitor from a former job I had for 4 years - Company B. Company A and B are direct competitors, both premium and ...
-3
votes
2answers
301 views

Convert a technical conflict into HR case

I have one conflict that is dressed as a technical issue which I believe is an actual HR issue. Involved in the technical conflict resolution are the project manager and the department lead. But the ...
2
votes
4answers
1k views

Conflict with older employee

An older colleague, a woman with 30+ years of experience as a cobol developer has been escalating me every week for the last nearly 2 months. She finds different pretexts for the same issue again and ...
4
votes
2answers
565 views

What do I do when a newly-hired manager occasionally dispensed praise and accolades towards me?

I work as a programmer in the information technology area. A new employee was hired to be a manager of an adjacent department, where the department is a 'customer' of my work. They request various ...
10
votes
3answers
1k views

Is Singapore a power distant culture?

I live in Europe. I got opportunities to work in Singapore, but I'm worried about the Asian power distant cultures. Here why: Last time I was traveling to Germany for seminars, there was some ...
7
votes
6answers
2k views

What to do when I'm being blackmailed by an ex

I have a crazy ex, We have been together on & off for a few years before I finally managed to leave her and call it off for good, that was a couple of years ago. She recently approached me (via ...
10
votes
3answers
2k views

Should I disclose to boss that I had a relationship in the past with a new hire?

My company is hiring one of my ex-flings. We were involved with each other for ~3 months, and broke up in mid 2018. On my part there are no feelings involved and working with him won't be a problem. I'...
4
votes
3answers
269 views

LinkedIn recommendations for some former colleagues but not all

At my previous place of work a lot of people had to leave, including me. We stay in touch. Of the people still working there some will probably have to look for new jobs soon. A few of my former ...
5
votes
4answers
725 views

How to talk to people (to push them to do better)

I would like some advice/recommendations on how to talk to people to push them to do better. Not only so the team can work faster, maybe better, but so that everyone can "push" each other as well. I'...
52
votes
16answers
11k views

How to do code reviews to people whose programming skills are weak?

I am a developer and I was recently promoted so I am doing significantly more code reviews now. Part of that includes doing code reviews on Github with people who are either not very competent or lack ...
9
votes
7answers
2k views

Company Christmas party coming soon, but I am new to the company and having panic attacks. How can I handle this?

I’m new to a role (started 4 weeks ago) and our work Christmas party is soon. Although I’ve spoken to most of the people I’m yet to be ‘in a group’ and the thought of going to a party where I’ll be on ...
1
vote
5answers
749 views

Reviewing old code database, how to start interacting with the dev team?

TL, DR: There was this software product being developed in my company, I needed to review a lot of the codebase. How do I talk to the development team? The not-so-short version: Due to several reasons ...
0
votes
3answers
742 views

Relationship with former colleagues

Recently I have been receiving private messages from two former colleagues whom I worked closely with while was working as an intern at my previous workplace. The first guy was my supervisor, he ...
5
votes
1answer
925 views

How to handle Social Engineered relationships after Red Team engagements? [closed]

I'm learning to become a Red Teamer, which simulates attacks by adversaries from multiple angles: Digital/Cyber, Physical and Social. This questions focuses on the Social Engineering aspect of Red ...
37
votes
10answers
24k views

HR trying to sabotage my wife's work because we're married [closed]

TLDR; My wife got a 1 month trial as a product manager and tester for a new product I'm directly designing and developing. HR hates the fact that we're married and is trying to seat her separate from ...
-6
votes
2answers
504 views

Secular Holidays Conundrum

My coworkers are doing Halloween and Christmas at work, I'm a Messianic Jew, how do I avoid ruining my relationship with them?
1
vote
2answers
665 views

What to do if you are unintentionaly subject of favoritism?

I have the following situation at work. I am part of a team with people having different background age-wise and business wise. Since the beginning of the project It happened so that I took the role ...
1
vote
3answers
406 views

How to avoid a proposed role by an HR but still be considered for another?

I am looking for a job and I've been contacting a senior manager of a firm directly. He is quite interested by my profile and forwarded my resume to his HR and the person right below him that covers ...
6
votes
2answers
3k views

Concerning a relationship in the team [closed]

This is about a situation that isn't strictly an employed workplace, but is similar. I am on project team at a university. It is supposedly a 'professional environment', though as we are all ...
0
votes
2answers
859 views

Advice on defusing a tense situation after disrespectful behaviour from a colleague [closed]

This happened to me today and I'm still trying to digest it. To give you some context, I'm working on IT at a company with several branches across Europe. I don't hold any position of responsibility ...
5
votes
3answers
984 views

How can I learn to navigate office politics?

I've had several jobs post-graduation already and whereas I always exceed expectations when it comes to my performance (i.e. shown expertise/ skills in the field I'm active in), I feel I could work on ...
0
votes
2answers
956 views

Asking project manager to put me in another project

Sorry for my english first. I am a programmer and I am working in a big outsourcing company, that provides programmers for other companies. Right now I am in a really bad project without any prospects ...
2
votes
2answers
543 views

How to deal with feeling left out at work? [closed]

I feel really lonely at work. At times I really just feel like my coworkers are only interacting with me because they have to. Here's the situation: I don't have any friends. So I think that might ...

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