Questions tagged [social-nuances]

Items related to various dimensions of interpersonal conduct, including any of several practices, expectations or traditions within a given institution, organization or industry.

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13 votes
4 answers
1k views

Interview process with aspergers

I have Asperger's and have major issues passing job interviews. In the past I have had a large number of job interviews (haven't kept count but probably somewhere between 60 and 100) and failed all ...
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5 votes
3 answers
851 views

What are the social expectations when leaving a job in the UK?

It's the last week at my current job and I was wondering about the exact social protocols / expectations for leaving employees in the UK. I'm leaving on good terms and everyone knows it's happening. ...
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  • 1,496
38 votes
8 answers
16k views

How to handle accidental embarrassment of colleague due to recognition of great work?

I am a team / technical lead in the cybersecurity team where I work. Our current company has a peer recognition system where anyone can nominate anyone else for contributions above and beyond ...
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  • 15.2k
32 votes
15 answers
8k views

I'm elitist: how to avoid being detrimental to my team members and value their contribution?

My mindset I'm elitist. I mean that I hold quite high standards when judging things and people. An Uber ride on time, or an Amazon product that does what it says on the tin? That's worth 3 stars.1 4 ...
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7 votes
2 answers
1k views

Boss wants me to join a team I dislike

In short: How do I tell my boss I don't want to join this team, or how do I negotiate conditions for joining if needed be? Long version: There's a group in my company who is responsible for developing ...
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  • 71
2 votes
5 answers
2k views

How to praise other people's work without sounding patronizing or insincere?

I recently started working with someone who throws around a lot of light praise to others, such as "good job on that!" "nice work" or "keep it up". He seems sincere but ...
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  • 6,190
0 votes
5 answers
2k views

How to handle poor social behaviour to a old senior from a colleague?

Background I am working in a small business (< 15 employees) as a software developer. Roughly half of us are. The rest is working as IT specialists for system integration. The coworker I am ...
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2 votes
3 answers
1k views

How to applaud in a teleconference?

Suppose a work culture/environment where, in an in-person meeting, if a presenter does a good job, other attendees express appreciation with applause/clapping. Suppose now that the same meeting ...
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  • 1,588
4 votes
2 answers
622 views

What do I do when a newly-hired manager occasionally dispensed praise and accolades towards me?

I work as a programmer in the information technology area. A new employee was hired to be a manager of an adjacent department, where the department is a 'customer' of my work. They request various ...
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  • 1,151
87 votes
17 answers
31k views

Company indirectly discriminating against introverts, specifically INTJ

Background On pretty much all tests out there, I heavily score as INTJ in the Myer-Briggs system. Some tests even suggest slight Asperger, combined with what I suspect is a healthy dose of OCD. I don'...
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11 votes
3 answers
3k views

Saying something to a foreign coworker who uses "you people"

A new co-worker who is not a native English speaker uses "you people" whenever referring to a group. As in "This quarter was great because of you people." If something negative happened "You people ...
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  • 22.9k
95 votes
12 answers
11k views

Problematic employee that can't be fired

I've recently been placed in charge of a software engineer who is considered a "problem" employee for a couple of reasons. The employee is not a capable people person. I believe he has a minor case of ...
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5 votes
3 answers
1k views

I have a hyper empathetic colleague that I do not get along with that sits accross from me. How do I improve the situation?

I have a colleague who is extremely empathetic, and can always tell exactly what I'm feeling, why I'm feeling it, and can predict what I may want him to do. He often takes various actions on my behalf ...
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4 votes
5 answers
749 views

Can I video job interviews?

Well I'm currently looking for a job, however the last 10 (so this is a good time to review it) interviews all apparently went "poorly", the result was; "we found a better candidate". Even though ...
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  • 1,584
1 vote
3 answers
400 views

Asking boss and co-workers to involve me more often

First, the context: I work in a small company (~12 people) where almost everyone works together for more than 10 years (some for more almost 20 years) and I'm by far the youngest person. I work there ...
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  • 113
95 votes
10 answers
21k views

How to politely refuse to put someone in touch with my professional network?

Short version: I was asked by someone I hardly knew to put them in touch with someone in my professional network. I gave them a name, but I now feel uncomfortable with it. For the next time: How ...
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  • 1,464
-1 votes
3 answers
379 views

What is the social norm when people in conversation have different pronunciations of the same word? [closed]

Basically i'm an English person looking for work in IT in Australia and I realised the other day that there is a word that will come up multiple times a day and is pronounced completely differently; ...
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  • 27
3 votes
2 answers
695 views

How to deal with excluding behaviour? [closed]

Background about myself: 40+, white, male, family, with the company for 10+ years, speaking English only. Over the past couple of years, there has been a change in the inofficial company structures (...
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5 votes
4 answers
1k views

How do I respond to my manager sending me a friend request? [duplicate]

I recently received a friend request on Facebook from one of my managers. My initial reaction was to reject this out of hand, however, this person is of a comparable age to me and at a similar place ...
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14 votes
5 answers
3k views

Is it appropriate to use email to ask a worker to stop backbiting?

I have a (female) coworker who always has a terrible mood and curses everything. While I can deal with that, now, after working a few months at this place, I see more and more that she terribly ...
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  • 808
7 votes
3 answers
1k views

How to handle ex-client asking for free advice in social situations?

I am a freelance computer programmer. I have a former client with whom I did a very successful project with a few years ago. We have mutual friends, I enjoy his company and his company does really ...
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  • 1,281
-3 votes
1 answer
507 views

The CEO wants to kitesurf with me [closed]

The CEO wants to kitesurf with me during working time. I have no trouble with that. But I'm trying to figure out the reasons behind this activity. Why does a CEO wants to do something like that? ...
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  • 255
44 votes
5 answers
10k views

Boss lied to me about how much others make [closed]

Recently, the startup I worked for had a location change so I asked for more payment in order to compensate. However, in return all I got was payment for the flight and I still had to pay for my own ...
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-3 votes
3 answers
3k views

My colleague is using mechanical keyboard and it's very distracting [duplicate]

We've both started at this company a few weeks ago. They got a mechanical keyboard on day two or so and it's very distracting. I can hear it over music on earphones. Ideally I'd like them to use a ...
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  • 705
-11 votes
2 answers
565 views

How to communicate with recruiter about skillset [closed]

(Note: there might be shades of social dynamics in that the recruiter interviewing me was an anthropology major with interest in evolutionary aspects and human origins, but still he seemed open to ...
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