Questions tagged [socializing]

Questions about talking to co-workers about non-work related materials. This can be talking on breaks, going to lunch or activities outside of working hours.

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7
votes
5answers
1k views

Company Christmas party coming soon, but I am new to the company and having panic attacks. How can I handle this?

I’m new to a role (started 4 weeks ago) and our work Christmas party is soon. Although I’ve spoken to most of the people I’m yet to be ‘in a group’ and the thought of going to a party where I’ll be on ...
2
votes
1answer
413 views

How to avoid feeling alone when working from home? [duplicate]

So, I've been working on this company as a software developer for almost 2 years now and lately, we've been changed to a home office regime, which was great at first but now I'm starting to miss ...
66
votes
5answers
12k views

Responding to social invitations with autism

So I have been told that there will be a Christmas Party happening at my work. I have autism I really do not like this sort of thing. This is my first ever job and I am really enjoying it. I have ...
5
votes
5answers
899 views

How to get more liked by colleagues?

I'm not well liked by colleagues. And this doesn't happen to me for the first time unfortunately. I will try to be objective in my description: I have friends and social networks outside of work, so ...
14
votes
6answers
1k views

How to exclude myself from informal activities with colleagues?

This may sound bad but please consider that I'm truly uncomfortable with these kinds of activities. I'm a junior software developer, I work with an amazing team and I get along with everyone. I'm ...
53
votes
7answers
9k views

Boss Cheating at Fantasy Football

My boss started a fantasy football league this year with a $20 buy-in with winner-take-all. I don't particularly care for football, but I signed up thinking it would be a good way to socialize with ...
6
votes
6answers
2k views

Fired employee allowed to go to company picnic

I worked for a company for over 3 years and was fired (not for cause). My daughter works there as well. It's time for the company picnic and she wants me to go with her (she is unmarried and high-...
7
votes
4answers
580 views

Should I make an event at work to celebrate my soon-to-be-wedding?

So it's my first time getting married (hope the only one) but I started a new job in a foreign country where I don't know the habits in term of mini events in workplace. I work in Germany and since I ...
3
votes
3answers
276 views

how can I help my team be included in company social events?

I manage a small team of myself and 2 others. The other software engineering teams at my organization tend to all get along and interact with each other socially a lot, while my team members are ...
61
votes
4answers
9k views

Declining welcome lunch invitation at new job due to Ramadan

I am starting a new position next month and I have been kindly invited to a team lunch. I would love to go, but due to the month of Ramadan I will be fasting during the day - no food or drinks allowed....
108
votes
15answers
20k views

How to stop co-workers from teasing me because I know Russian?

I work on a team of 8 people for a U.S financial company, and a few weeks ago, a business meeting with some clients overseas was taking place. My manager asked us in an e-mail if anyone can speak and ...
2
votes
5answers
855 views

How to balance my talkings with colleagues inside the workplace?

I'm working in a company as the only software developer and my co-workers which do website data entry need to talk to each other to proceed with their tasks. My salary is about 4 times of them. So I ...
0
votes
2answers
225 views

Can work mandate social activities in South Africa [closed]

Can management force you to partake in social activities in South Africa i.e. can employers make social activities (or part of it) mandatory? Is there any legislation that can assist me and if so can ...
0
votes
3answers
495 views

Party game to help learn coworkers' names and positions [closed]

I had suggested we host an ice cream social at my work, so I have been tasked with handling all the details. We have a lot of new faces, so management wants me to incorporate a short game/party ...
4
votes
4answers
881 views

Survival without Linkedin profile in software industry [closed]

Internet is full of advantages of having a linkedin profile. I, despite being a software engineer, don't feel comfortable (and feel anxious a lot - extremely panic feeling) broadcasting myself and my ...
0
votes
3answers
252 views

Asking boss and co-workers to involve me more often

First, the context: I work in a small company (~12 people) where almost everyone works together for more than 10 years (some for more almost 20 years) and I'm by far the youngest person. I work there ...
4
votes
2answers
2k views

Asking interviewer out on a casual lunch date [closed]

I have recently attended an interview; it went on pretty well. Both of us liked the technical discussion and I was offered a job too. But, I rejected it as the salary negotiation with the HR was not ...
7
votes
2answers
1k views

My boss is trying to be my friend. How should I handle this?

I started a new job as a software developer at a small (~50 people) company in October, and my new project manager (boss) started a month after I did. He's the outgoing, touchy-feely type; I can't ...
1
vote
1answer
889 views

I am a personal assistant for a blind person and not sure how to deal with this problem [closed]

I work as a personal assistant for an older blind person, I will call her KK. This is a new job for me. She is very extroverted and has a lot of friends. The thing is that her male friends are all ...
1
vote
3answers
648 views

How can I plan a Christmas party when there seems to be no suitable date?

So I've been asked to plan a Christmas party for my department (roughly 40 people). I have three requirements: The party has to be before December 25th. The main boss has to be available on the ...
13
votes
6answers
3k views

How do I unfriend a co-worker?

TL;DR; I want to unfriend coworker for her overly attached behavior, but she is also a QA of some of the projects that I develop. I was dragged into a group of 4 girls at work without me trying to ...
99
votes
14answers
39k views

Do I have to attend a work Christmas party?

I've just started a new job, which I'm enjoying. I recently received an email, asking all employees to choose what they would like to eat at the work Christmas party. I personally would not choose to ...
104
votes
12answers
29k views

Will declining my company's many social events negatively influence my career?

I've been working for this company in the Netherlands for 6 months now. When they said they valued get-togethers and game nights, I expected the occasional Friday afternoon gathering or a game night ...
16
votes
3answers
1k views

Can I gracefully skip part of a work outing?

I have just started a job 4 days ago (hooray!). The model of my team is a "startup within a big corporation," so we work in a coworking space separate from the main campus, people are in and out a lot,...
-1
votes
5answers
561 views

Consequences of not attending work offsite day as a contractor? [duplicate]

The scenario is the whole office (30 people) is having an off-site day at park, like a (catered) picnic. It’s not a teamwork type of retreat, though I’m sure a side effect is better teamwork in the ...
53
votes
10answers
11k views

How do I explain that I am in the office to work, not to have fun?

Our office has a ping-ping table, and I am occasionally invited to play during work hours. Meanwhile my co-workers will often take a few minutes out of the day to chat about their homes, families, ...
3
votes
2answers
643 views

How to deal with excluding behaviour? [closed]

Background about myself: 40+, white, male, family, with the company for 10+ years, speaking English only. Over the past couple of years, there has been a change in the inofficial company structures (...
5
votes
4answers
835 views

How do I respond to my manager sending me a friend request? [duplicate]

I recently received a friend request on Facebook from one of my managers. My initial reaction was to reject this out of hand, however, this person is of a comparable age to me and at a similar place ...
0
votes
1answer
1k views

What is the best way to politely decline invitations to go for drinks with work colleagues? [duplicate]

I work for a small company (6 full time employees, including owner/ director, 1 part time employee), and have been there for almost a year. Occasionally, one of my colleagues will organise an evening ...
99
votes
11answers
20k views

I don't want to pay for a work social event, how should I respond if asked why I declined?

My company wants to hold its first ever social event over the weekend at someone's house. At first I accepted the invitation, although I wasn't at all into it, but then I learned that all the costs ...
13
votes
3answers
2k views

Is it okay to turn down an invitation to my own retirement party?

I had to retire from work after 23 years to care for my ill husband. No breaks. I’m here 24/7. I order groceries on line for delivery. I’m his caretaker. With his dementia and disease he cannot be ...
0
votes
3answers
876 views

How to separate personal Facebook from professional FB while getting full benefit of FB? [closed]

I am a web based software engineer in Sri Lanka and I have own my web design business. It is really important to engage with Facebook groups to get local projects. That's how you build a network and ...
4
votes
2answers
575 views

Being seen as assertive in the workplace [closed]

I am a young woman of small build. I also give off the impression of being 'Ms Perfect' for the fact that I take care of my appearance and weight. I'm also ambitious. I find I am constantly being '...
11
votes
3answers
4k views

Company invites me to event after firing me [closed]

I worked for a development company 2 years ago. I was fired on my last day of probation, after 6 months. I wasn't really expecting it. I felt a bit bitter about it; The boss also behaved improperly ...
110
votes
17answers
27k views

Is it reasonable for me to complain about an objectionable newspaper being ordered for the office?

Our office has had newspapers delivered for some years. I don't recall the staff were ever consulted on what newspapers they wanted, but staff read them during lunch or coffee breaks. Recently the ...
6
votes
3answers
1k views

How to interact with a coworker I have to interact with regularly but who is very opinionated about everything

On a regular basis, I have to interact and coordinate with a coworker who is one of those highly opinionated people that has no filter. I find myself avoiding her as much as possible, to the point ...
90
votes
11answers
17k views

Ramifications of not inviting a teammate I don't like to my personal function

I'm a female employee, and I have a baby shower coming up next week. I wish to invite my colleagues to the party. But there is one guy in my team I don't like, because he used to keep staring at me. ...
8
votes
3answers
1k views

Everyone is talking about politics in the common lunches. Any better option than leaving?

I live in a place where there's quite a lot of convulsion in terms of independency of the country. My ideas don't really care, but in the office there are both sides, and the verbal fights are close ...
-4
votes
1answer
472 views

Is “all hands” TGIF meeting mandatory? [closed]

If the employer calls it an all-hands TGIF meeting, is it implying that the meeting is mandatory, or that everyone can attend, but doesn't have to?
-3
votes
1answer
491 views

The CEO wants to kitesurf with me [closed]

The CEO wants to kitesurf with me during working time. I have no trouble with that. But I'm trying to figure out the reasons behind this activity. Why does a CEO wants to do something like that? ...
11
votes
2answers
2k views

I want to avoid a 2-day social event organized by the company on working days

A company event is advertised with the words "attending is expected", which I assume means attending is obligatory. There doesn't seem to be anything work-related, but it seems to be a spirit building ...
1
vote
3answers
684 views

Discussing dreams with coworkers [closed]

A coworker and I are on pretty good terms. We've been working within talking distance from each other for a few years, usually on the same projects in a team. We sometimes, but not very often, discuss ...
71
votes
13answers
17k views

Informal Chat in Concluding an Interview; is it appropriate to ask about a hobby/interest?

As a senior software developer (based in UK), I help my manager arrange and conduct interviews. My boss used to conduct the interviews himself, but realised that he needed someone more tech-savvy ...
10
votes
2answers
1k views

Soft-skills… how and why?

Intro: I'm originally a physicist, and I love programming since my childhood (primarily C++). After finishing my PhD in physics, I did a post-doctoral fellowship in a university for 2 years, where in ...
2
votes
2answers
335 views

Tips on staying professional while dealing with major family illness?

Very suddenly my mother and aunt got the news they're terminally ill. My father is chronically ill, his brother just had a stroke and my sister in law is chronically ill as well. I was dealing with ...
5
votes
3answers
2k views

“Professionalism” After Work Hours and Separating the Two

I apologize if this is "off-topic", but based off my reading of this stack for a while (man, are there ever some interesting questions popping up around here), I believe I am within site scope. The ...
10
votes
2answers
2k views

Are there good reasons to NOT invite my boss to Thanksgiving dinner?

I have a pretty solid professional relationship with my boss. We also get along well personally and share some things in common that don't relate to work that we talk about. I have a suspicion, but am ...
4
votes
0answers
149 views

How do I overcome my Social Anxiety during work? [duplicate]

I work for a medium size manufacturing business (200 or so employees) as the sole System Administrator. Because I am the only person who does anything with the IT infrastructure it also means that I ...
5
votes
2answers
419 views

Meeting potential interviewer in social situation

My friend was offered an interview for a job at a company that his friend works for (his friend is one of the interviewers as well), but turned it down as he had just started a new job. He told his ...
4
votes
2answers
802 views

How to socialise when you are from a third world country?

I am from one of these countries that have a very bad reputation regarding human rights, women rights. (But differently not me) I got a job in the Netherlands I am in my 5th week Employees try to ...