Questions tagged [socializing]

Questions about talking to co-workers about non-work related materials. This can be talking on breaks, going to lunch or activities outside of working hours.

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Should I pay for dinner to pay back a dinner from 3 years ago?

A few years ago at a conference I was all but certain I was about to get fired so I refused to spend too much money eating out. My co-worker paid the entire bill at a steakhouse for us to eat dinner ...
user175183's user avatar
1 vote
4 answers
3k views

How can I ask my senior male manager to coffee with me?

I am intern in the niche finance firm where everyone knows each other because it is so small. He is 10 years older than me and my senior but not my direct boss. I will leave the firm soon, in less ...
user avatar
16 votes
10 answers
19k views

Can my UK company order me to join a social event?

I like doing my job and with COVID I love working from home with meetings via Teams. After COVID, I'm continuing working from home. My productivity is higher than in the office and I often work (...
Enrico's user avatar
  • 432
0 votes
2 answers
572 views

Becoming more social in life and at workplace [closed]

I work in a large office with many coworkers. I am not a very social person. But, would like to change this and build better relationships in life (not limited to workplace). Is there anyone here who ...
Anant's user avatar
  • 325
63 votes
9 answers
17k views

Is it appropriate to speak up for a team member who can't drink due to addiction recovery when a company event is being planned?

I am the team lead of a team of ten. One of my team members in the past has undergone counseling due to alcohol abuse / excessive drinking. He has since recovered, but no longer drinks. Senior ...
Anthony's user avatar
  • 20.8k
-2 votes
5 answers
2k views

tell direct report to come to social event

I am a mid level manager. I have a direct report that doesn't talk much. I want him to socialize with the team. Is it okay to tell him in private that he needs to start either socializing more or ...
user avatar
1 vote
2 answers
758 views

Should you remain seated or stand up when someone at a workplace networking comes to speak to you?

I'm a recent graduate and just completed my vacation work at one of the big Accounting firms. On Friday, they had a social/drinks which was really just to chat and network amongst the team. If you are ...
Jackson Parker's user avatar
5 votes
3 answers
3k views

What are the social expectations when leaving a job in the UK?

It's the last week at my current job and I was wondering about the exact social protocols / expectations for leaving employees in the UK. I'm leaving on good terms and everyone knows it's happening. ...
KubaFYI's user avatar
  • 1,540
35 votes
6 answers
10k views

As an introvert, how do I connect with co-workers at a new job?

I just started a job at an insurance company. The problem I'm having is that I don't talk to my co-workers unless it's work related. I'm new in the office and all of them are already friends. As the ...
user129472's user avatar
5 votes
4 answers
2k views

Is it OK not to socialize with the coworker in the public transport from and to work and use this time for reading and learning? [closed]

There's so much I want to read and so little time to do it. Is it okay to use my commuting time for reading and not for socializing with co-worker(s) that sometimes share the same transport? I ...
TomR's user avatar
  • 433
74 votes
13 answers
19k views

Is opting out of "fun" office charity activites socially and professionally acceptable in a small company?

Note: this questions is specifically about charity activity and not social events generally. I work in a small startup which recently grew to 14 people which apparently seems to be enough for "...
KubaFYI's user avatar
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3 votes
3 answers
1k views

How to handle social interactions with someone I fired for poor performance?

I fired someone for poor performance several months ago, and they haven't signed their severance paperwork yet so I am actively worried about litigation. I saw last weekend that they just joined my ...
Sarkom's user avatar
  • 157
39 votes
9 answers
14k views

How can I get my co-workers to have conversations with me in their native language instead of English?

I am an immigrant in Taiwan. All but one of my co-workers are Taiwanese. I expect to live here forever, I speak Chinese, yet many of my co-workers won't speak Chinese with me. Originally no one did ...
user avatar
6 votes
5 answers
2k views

Is being anti social a serious hinderance in my career? How to cope with it?

OK So I am looking for a job right now, was out of the country for some time and now back in trying to settle. I am a software engineer with 10+ years of experience, I am having a bit of hard time ...
TheTechGuy's user avatar
  • 1,669
2 votes
2 answers
692 views

Working on independent projects, should I still spend time/ hang around with my competency team?

I am working on 3 separate projects that are linked under my competency's team but are completely separate/independent from that team's major project. I have been a part of the team for almost a year ...
Sherry's user avatar
  • 417
1 vote
1 answer
488 views

Best way to be friends with people at work in a new country

How can I get more involved with people at work? I wouldn't want to come off as desperate of course and I am not. However, I feel it is important to do it here especially since I anyway know very few ...
systemdebt's user avatar
4 votes
2 answers
642 views

What do I do when a newly-hired manager occasionally dispensed praise and accolades towards me?

I work as a programmer in the information technology area. A new employee was hired to be a manager of an adjacent department, where the department is a 'customer' of my work. They request various ...
Chris's user avatar
  • 1,171
2 votes
3 answers
764 views

Is a appropriate to greet someone as they are leaving the washroom?

In the morning, I typically greet every coworker I see with a simple "good morning" or they will greet me first in such a way. Say I'm walking to my desk and a coworker happens to leave the washroom ...
redmed21's user avatar
9 votes
7 answers
3k views

Company Christmas party coming soon, but I am new to the company and having panic attacks. How can I handle this?

I’m new to a role (started 4 weeks ago) and our work Christmas party is soon. Although I’ve spoken to most of the people I’m yet to be ‘in a group’ and the thought of going to a party where I’ll be on ...
Anna 's user avatar
  • 107
3 votes
1 answer
473 views

How to avoid feeling alone when working from home? [duplicate]

So, I've been working on this company as a software developer for almost 2 years now and lately, we've been changed to a home office regime, which was great at first but now I'm starting to miss ...
user112358's user avatar
65 votes
5 answers
13k views

Responding to social invitations with autism

So I have been told that there will be a Christmas Party happening at my work. I have autism I really do not like this sort of thing. This is my first ever job and I am really enjoying it. I have ...
Geo's user avatar
  • 647
5 votes
5 answers
1k views

How to get more liked by colleagues?

I'm not well liked by colleagues. And this doesn't happen to me for the first time unfortunately. I will try to be objective in my description: I have friends and social networks outside of work, so ...
user41156346's user avatar
14 votes
6 answers
2k views

How to exclude myself from informal activities with colleagues?

This may sound bad but please consider that I'm truly uncomfortable with these kinds of activities. I'm a junior software developer, I work with an amazing team and I get along with everyone. I'm ...
user avatar
53 votes
7 answers
10k views

Boss Cheating at Fantasy Football

My boss started a fantasy football league this year with a $20 buy-in with winner-take-all. I don't particularly care for football, but I signed up thinking it would be a good way to socialize with ...
fantasymealprep's user avatar
6 votes
6 answers
2k views

Fired employee allowed to go to company picnic

I worked for a company for over 3 years and was fired (not for cause). My daughter works there as well. It's time for the company picnic and she wants me to go with her (she is unmarried and high-...
user106705's user avatar
6 votes
4 answers
944 views

Should I make an event at work to celebrate my soon-to-be-wedding?

So it's my first time getting married (hope the only one) but I started a new job in a foreign country where I don't know the habits in term of mini events in workplace. I work in Germany and since I ...
TinyDoowy's user avatar
  • 171
3 votes
3 answers
320 views

how can I help my team be included in company social events?

I manage a small team of myself and 2 others. The other software engineering teams at my organization tend to all get along and interact with each other socially a lot, while my team members are ...
britter's user avatar
  • 39
61 votes
4 answers
10k views

Declining welcome lunch invitation at new job due to Ramadan

I am starting a new position next month and I have been kindly invited to a team lunch. I would love to go, but due to the month of Ramadan I will be fasting during the day - no food or drinks allowed....
umutesen's user avatar
  • 391
111 votes
15 answers
21k views

How to stop co-workers from teasing me because I know Russian?

I work on a team of 8 people for a U.S financial company, and a few weeks ago, a business meeting with some clients overseas was taking place. My manager asked us in an e-mail if anyone can speak and ...
user avatar
2 votes
5 answers
901 views

How to balance my talkings with colleagues inside the workplace?

I'm working in a company as the only software developer and my co-workers which do website data entry need to talk to each other to proceed with their tasks. My salary is about 4 times of them. So I ...
VSB's user avatar
  • 125
0 votes
1 answer
287 views

Can work mandate social activities in South Africa [closed]

Can management force you to partake in social activities in South Africa i.e. can employers make social activities (or part of it) mandatory? Is there any legislation that can assist me and if so can ...
Alice's user avatar
  • 29
-1 votes
3 answers
733 views

Party game to help learn coworkers' names and positions [closed]

I had suggested we host an ice cream social at my work, so I have been tasked with handling all the details. We have a lot of new faces, so management wants me to incorporate a short game/party ...
Eric's user avatar
  • 147
5 votes
4 answers
2k views

Survival without Linkedin profile in software industry [closed]

Internet is full of advantages of having a linkedin profile. I, despite being a software engineer, don't feel comfortable (and feel anxious a lot - extremely panic feeling) broadcasting myself and my ...
Anonymous's user avatar
1 vote
3 answers
469 views

Asking boss and co-workers to involve me more often

First, the context: I work in a small company (~12 people) where almost everyone works together for more than 10 years (some for more almost 20 years) and I'm by far the youngest person. I work there ...
cinico's user avatar
  • 113
4 votes
2 answers
2k views

Asking interviewer out on a casual lunch date [closed]

I have recently attended an interview; it went on pretty well. Both of us liked the technical discussion and I was offered a job too. But, I rejected it as the salary negotiation with the HR was not ...
Sara's user avatar
  • 789
8 votes
2 answers
2k views

My boss is trying to be my friend. How should I handle this?

I started a new job as a software developer at a small (~50 people) company in October, and my new project manager (boss) started a month after I did. He's the outgoing, touchy-feely type; I can't ...
AwkwardSpoon's user avatar
1 vote
1 answer
1k views

I am a personal assistant for a blind person and not sure how to deal with this problem [closed]

I work as a personal assistant for an older blind person, I will call her KK. This is a new job for me. She is very extroverted and has a lot of friends. The thing is that her male friends are all ...
VL86's user avatar
  • 35
1 vote
3 answers
731 views

How can I plan a Christmas party when there seems to be no suitable date?

So I've been asked to plan a Christmas party for my department (roughly 40 people). I have three requirements: The party has to be before December 25th. The main boss has to be available on the ...
Jessica's user avatar
  • 137
16 votes
6 answers
5k views

How do I unfriend a co-worker? [duplicate]

TL;DR; I want to unfriend a coworker for her overly attached behavior, but she is also a QA of some of the projects that I develop. I was dragged into a group of 4 girls at work without me trying to ...
nyagolova's user avatar
  • 1,977
104 votes
14 answers
49k views

Do I have to attend a work Christmas party?

I've just started a new job, which I'm enjoying. I recently received an email, asking all employees to choose what they would like to eat at the work Christmas party. I personally would not choose to ...
th3no0b's user avatar
  • 1,150
118 votes
12 answers
35k views

Will declining my company's many social events negatively influence my career?

I've been working for this company in the Netherlands for 6 months now. When they said they valued get-togethers and game nights, I expected the occasional Friday afternoon gathering or a game night ...
Summer's user avatar
  • 6,038
16 votes
3 answers
2k views

Can I gracefully skip part of a work outing?

I have just started a job 4 days ago (hooray!). The model of my team is a "startup within a big corporation," so we work in a coworking space separate from the main campus, people are in and out a lot,...
Alex's user avatar
  • 271
-1 votes
5 answers
730 views

Consequences of not attending work offsite day as a contractor? [duplicate]

The scenario is the whole office (30 people) is having an off-site day at park, like a (catered) picnic. It’s not a teamwork type of retreat, though I’m sure a side effect is better teamwork in the ...
user70848's user avatar
  • 2,678
53 votes
10 answers
12k views

How do I explain that I am in the office to work, not to have fun?

Our office has a ping-ping table, and I am occasionally invited to play during work hours. Meanwhile my co-workers will often take a few minutes out of the day to chat about their homes, families, ...
Benubird's user avatar
  • 3,907
3 votes
2 answers
728 views

How to deal with excluding behaviour? [closed]

Background about myself: 40+, white, male, family, with the company for 10+ years, speaking English only. Over the past couple of years, there has been a change in the inofficial company structures (...
Holly Wood's user avatar
5 votes
4 answers
1k views

How do I respond to my manager sending me a friend request? [duplicate]

I recently received a friend request on Facebook from one of my managers. My initial reaction was to reject this out of hand, however, this person is of a comparable age to me and at a similar place ...
Pyrotechnical's user avatar
0 votes
1 answer
2k views

What is the best way to politely decline invitations to go for drinks with work colleagues? [duplicate]

I work for a small company (6 full time employees, including owner/ director, 1 part time employee), and have been there for almost a year. Occasionally, one of my colleagues will organise an evening ...
Noble-Surfer's user avatar
  • 2,958
101 votes
11 answers
22k views

I don't want to pay for a work social event, how should I respond if asked why I declined?

My company wants to hold its first ever social event over the weekend at someone's house. At first I accepted the invitation, although I wasn't at all into it, but then I learned that all the costs ...
Haitham's user avatar
  • 795
12 votes
3 answers
3k views

Is it okay to turn down an invitation to my own retirement party?

I had to retire from work after 23 years to care for my ill husband. No breaks. I’m here 24/7. I order groceries on line for delivery. I’m his caretaker. With his dementia and disease he cannot be ...
user85599's user avatar
  • 131
4 votes
3 answers
2k views

How to separate personal Facebook from professional FB while getting full benefit of FB? [closed]

I am a web based software engineer in Sri Lanka and I have own my web design business. It is really important to engage with Facebook groups to get local projects. That's how you build a network and ...
I am the Most Stupid Person's user avatar