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Questions tagged [socializing]

Questions about talking to co-workers about non-work related materials. This can be talking on breaks, going to lunch or activities outside of working hours.

110
votes
15answers
19k views

How to stop co-workers from teasing me because I know Russian?

I work on a team of 8 people for a U.S financial company, and a few weeks ago, a business meeting with some clients overseas was taking place. My manager asked us in an e-mail if anyone can speak and ...
109
votes
17answers
27k views

Is it reasonable for me to complain about an objectionable newspaper being ordered for the office?

Our office has had newspapers delivered for some years. I don't recall the staff were ever consulted on what newspapers they wanted, but staff read them during lunch or coffee breaks. Recently the ...
101
votes
12answers
27k views

Will declining my company's many social events negatively influence my career?

I've been working for this company in the Netherlands for 6 months now. When they said they valued get-togethers and game nights, I expected the occasional Friday afternoon gathering or a game night ...
100
votes
11answers
19k views

I don't want to pay for a work social event, how should I respond if asked why I declined?

My company wants to hold its first ever social event over the weekend at someone's house. At first I accepted the invitation, although I wasn't at all into it, but then I learned that all the costs ...
96
votes
14answers
34k views

Do I have to attend a work Christmas party?

I've just started a new job, which I'm enjoying. I recently received an email, asking all employees to choose what they would like to eat at the work Christmas party. I personally would not choose to ...
90
votes
11answers
17k views

Ramifications of not inviting a teammate I don't like to my personal function

I'm a female employee, and I have a baby shower coming up next week. I wish to invite my colleagues to the party. But there is one guy in my team I don't like, because he used to keep staring at me. ...
72
votes
13answers
17k views

Informal Chat in Concluding an Interview; is it appropriate to ask about a hobby/interest?

As a senior software developer (based in UK), I help my manager arrange and conduct interviews. My boss used to conduct the interviews himself, but realised that he needed someone more tech-savvy ...
60
votes
4answers
9k views

Declining welcome lunch invitation at new job due to Ramadan

I am starting a new position next month and I have been kindly invited to a team lunch. I would love to go, but due to the month of Ramadan I will be fasting during the day - no food or drinks allowed....
54
votes
8answers
11k views

Is it generally unacceptable to become close friends with colleagues?

I'm a young graduate fresh out of university just under a year ago. I went to an international school in my youth and did not establish many friendships during university due to the girlfriend in ...
53
votes
10answers
10k views

How do I explain that I am in the office to work, not to have fun?

Our office has a ping-ping table, and I am occasionally invited to play during work hours. Meanwhile my co-workers will often take a few minutes out of the day to chat about their homes, families, ...
53
votes
10answers
8k views

Is there any way to appear sociable at a work social event without drinking?

I generally steer clear of sugary junk food such as beer, fruit juices, etc. I'm not really a fan of drinking alcohol either, as I like my sleep. So when I go out with a bunch of work colleagues and ...
39
votes
3answers
8k views

Arranging drinks with laid off coworkers in close-knit team

I work in a close-knit team of about 20 that just suffered layoffs. Some of the surviving employees and laid off employees are friends, and several survivors have suggested arranging drinks with the ...
38
votes
6answers
10k views

When taking clients out for drinks, how to behave when I cannot drink?

I will be spending more and more time with clients in the near future and we are encouraged to regularly socialize with and entertain them, especially by taking them out for drinks. I wonder whether ...
33
votes
4answers
4k views

How do I distance myself from a clique that's constantly mocking my colleagues?

There is a small group of people in the office who have formed a clique of sorts. They go out to eat together, constantly talk to or IM each other, have inside jokes, all sorts of fun stuff. When I ...
32
votes
9answers
4k views

Disagreeing with boss over personal topics when socializing

Is it bad practice to disagree with a boss on personal opinions, in the context of talking about things for fun? For example, if a boss is talking about how much corruption is in the Catholic Church ...
32
votes
7answers
4k views

What are some guidelines for appropriate social drinking in a work-related context?

Everyone or nearly everyone has at some point an occasion to drink either at work as part of a work function or with a group of friends from work. What are some ways to help avoid the pitfalls of ...
28
votes
6answers
3k views

How much humor should I display in an interview?

In an interview, there is often this icy nervousness. Would it be appropriate to make a comment about something mundane, like the coffeeshop nearby, etc? Just to break the ice? How much humor can I ...
27
votes
4answers
19k views

What do you do/say to someone who has been off work because they lost someone close?

If you have a colleague or boss who is off work because a significant person (wife/husband/child/parent/grandparent) in their life died, what is the workplace norm for communication? Should you ...
27
votes
3answers
4k views

How to handle awkward conversation with co-worker in gym changing room who is naked

I was at the gym (non work affiliated if it makes a difference) last week and ran into a co worker in the changing rooms. This would have been fine except she had just walked out of the shower ...
27
votes
7answers
3k views

How can I limit or avoid social faux pas when I have a disability that makes it hard

I have Asperger's syndrome which makes it difficult for me to navigate the social aspects of the workplace, and I understand that other conditions such as depression, anxiety, et cetera can also cause ...
24
votes
6answers
5k views

Adjusting to a team with conflicting socialisation preferences for a group dinner

I started a new job half a year ago. I am very satisfied, there's just one thing. The team is pretty outgoing and they like to go out for a dinner together once or twice a month. I don't mind that, ...
23
votes
6answers
3k views

How can I not come across as uninterested or rude during an interview?

I've been told by many people (including my former boss) that I look unhappy or upset about something. This is almost always untrue when people point this out. I attribute this mostly to my anxiety. I'...
20
votes
3answers
4k views

How to react when superiors make fun of junior employees during informal/social events?

I am a junior manager (promoted from within) and recently started being invited to some social and informal events with senior management. It is good to know that I am getting closer to their inner ...
17
votes
4answers
23k views

Is not attending the company holiday party damaging to my job and/or my career?

Many companies I've worked for host company functions like a holiday party. I understand that these are suppose to serve as a bit of a morale booster and a thank you from the company to the employees. ...
16
votes
8answers
6k views

How can I drop a polite hint to a coworker to stop pestering me with daily questions about my lunch?

I have a coworker who, without fail, asks me the same set of small talk lunch-related questions. Every. Single. Day. For example: (As I'm heading out the door) Him: Where you goin?! Me (usually ...
16
votes
3answers
1k views

Can I gracefully skip part of a work outing?

I have just started a job 4 days ago (hooray!). The model of my team is a "startup within a big corporation," so we work in a coworking space separate from the main campus, people are in and out a lot,...
16
votes
4answers
3k views

How should I handle colleagues with very different work ethic?

I prefer to work intensively for eight hours with complete focus, then leave relax in the evenings - work hard, play hard. My colleagues on the other hand, prefer to be in the office for 10-12 hours ...
15
votes
7answers
2k views

Should we ban facebook or any other social network at workplace?

In our company we do not bother much about people using social networks such as Facebook. But I am realizing that people are misusing this now. They are engaged in it more than the real job for which ...
15
votes
3answers
4k views

How can I decline business-lunch invitations due to strict dietary restrictions?

I don't eat out at restaurants, I'm a strict vegetarian, and it's part of my faith. However, recently my manager invited me and other colleagues to a lunch. I don't want to be disrespectful and say ...
13
votes
3answers
2k views

Is it okay to turn down an invitation to my own retirement party?

I had to retire from work after 23 years to care for my ill husband. No breaks. I’m here 24/7. I order groceries on line for delivery. I’m his caretaker. With his dementia and disease he cannot be ...
13
votes
5answers
16k views

When is it appropriate to bring a Significant Other to an office function?

There are some events such as drinks in the office after work, where it is clearly inappropriate to bring a significant other, but others such as holiday parties where it is perfectly acceptable. I ...
12
votes
3answers
5k views

What's the most appropriate way to introduce my boss to friends and family?

There is an upcoming social event organized by my employer where friends and family will be invited. The company is a fairly small company in the UK and I will inevitably need to introduce my family ...
12
votes
6answers
3k views

How do I unfriend a co-worker?

TL;DR; I want to unfriend coworker for her overly attached behavior, but she is also a QA of some of the projects that I develop. I was dragged into a group of 4 girls at work without me trying to ...
11
votes
3answers
4k views

Company invites me to event after firing me [closed]

I worked for a development company 2 years ago. I was fired on my last day of probation, after 6 months. I wasn't really expecting it. I felt a bit bitter about it; The boss also behaved improperly ...
11
votes
2answers
2k views

I want to avoid a 2-day social event organized by the company on working days

A company event is advertised with the words "attending is expected", which I assume means attending is obligatory. There doesn't seem to be anything work-related, but it seems to be a spirit building ...
10
votes
4answers
4k views

Can my employer make me drink alcohol? [closed]

I work at a company with a rowdy atmosphere that includes pressure to drink alcohol. Multiple people at the company told me verbatim that I would even been judged negatively in terms of hiring ...
10
votes
6answers
4k views

Is it acceptable to politely decline to speak about one's personal life?

I've seen this answer, where the person says that one might present oneself poorly if they hide their personal lives from their co-workers. In-spite of that, I believe that revealing information ...
10
votes
2answers
2k views

Are there good reasons to NOT invite my boss to Thanksgiving dinner?

I have a pretty solid professional relationship with my boss. We also get along well personally and share some things in common that don't relate to work that we talk about. I have a suspicion, but am ...
10
votes
2answers
971 views

Soft-skills… how and why?

Intro: I'm originally a physicist, and I love programming since my childhood (primarily C++). After finishing my PhD in physics, I did a post-doctoral fellowship in a university for 2 years, where in ...
10
votes
4answers
968 views

Suggestions for building relationships as a remote office worker?

I've started working remotely for a company a few timezones away. I'm not the most social person to begin with, but now that I can't even say "hi" in the hall, How can I help remind people I exist? ...
9
votes
6answers
20k views

How can I manage an in-person job interview when I have social anxiety?

So far I have been chatting with a potential employer over email. She will eventually ask to meet in person. The problem is that I am very nervous when around other people and thus I reckon the way ...
9
votes
3answers
1k views

What jobs/workplace environments are more conducive to social interaction?

Some programmers are not social individuals and are happy at their terminal all day. Others are more social. I have seen claims that "The happiest Americans report 7-8 hours of social interaction a ...
8
votes
4answers
2k views

Invited for a New Year party, should I go? [closed]

I have been invited to a New Year party at a company where I have accepted a role, but as yet haven't joined. My joining date is more than 10 days after New Year. I am very happy that they have ...
8
votes
3answers
2k views

New team commonly goes for a drink on Friday lunchtime - could attending this event negatively effect me?

I have recently moved to a new team in my company and they often go out for a drink during lunch hour on a Friday. It's only a single drink, but I'm not sure what the rules are regarding this. In ...
8
votes
5answers
17k views

Responding to “Why are you the best person for this job” type questions

Note: In somewhat the same vein as this question. I recently landed a new job, but I was asked during the interview "Why do you think you're the best person for the job?" and they mentioned that this ...
8
votes
3answers
1k views

Everyone is talking about politics in the common lunches. Any better option than leaving?

I live in a place where there's quite a lot of convulsion in terms of independency of the country. My ideas don't really care, but in the office there are both sides, and the verbal fights are close ...
8
votes
4answers
2k views

How to deal with an employee who refuses to follow social etiquette

I have an employee who reports to me who refuses to behave within accepted social norms, when it comes to respect for their co-workers. The individual in question is blunt, rude, and aggressively ...
8
votes
2answers
835 views

Who to invite to a team event?

I have an opportunity to organise a social outing for my project team. Other than the immediate members of the team, would it be appropriate to invite other team members that are not part of the core ...
6
votes
3answers
1k views

How to interact with a coworker I have to interact with regularly but who is very opinionated about everything

On a regular basis, I have to interact and coordinate with a coworker who is one of those highly opinionated people that has no filter. I find myself avoiding her as much as possible, to the point ...
6
votes
3answers
2k views

“Professionalism” After Work Hours and Separating the Two

I apologize if this is "off-topic", but based off my reading of this stack for a while (man, are there ever some interesting questions popping up around here), I believe I am within site scope. The ...