Questions tagged [socializing]

Questions about talking to co-workers about non-work related materials. This can be talking on breaks, going to lunch or activities outside of working hours.

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-1 votes
2 answers
1k views

Should I pay for dinner to pay back a dinner from 3 years ago?

A few years ago at a conference I was all but certain I was about to get fired so I refused to spend too much money eating out. My co-worker paid the entire bill at a steakhouse for us to eat dinner ...
39 votes
9 answers
14k views

How can I get my co-workers to have conversations with me in their native language instead of English?

I am an immigrant in Taiwan. All but one of my co-workers are Taiwanese. I expect to live here forever, I speak Chinese, yet many of my co-workers won't speak Chinese with me. Originally no one did ...
1 vote
4 answers
2k views

How can I ask my senior male manager to coffee with me?

I am intern in the niche finance firm where everyone knows each other because it is so small. He is 10 years older than me and my senior but not my direct boss. I will leave the firm soon, in less ...
116 votes
12 answers
35k views

Will declining my company's many social events negatively influence my career?

I've been working for this company in the Netherlands for 6 months now. When they said they valued get-togethers and game nights, I expected the occasional Friday afternoon gathering or a game night ...
15 votes
10 answers
18k views

Can my UK company order me to join a social event?

I like doing my job and with COVID I love working from home with meetings via Teams. After COVID, I'm continuing working from home. My productivity is higher than in the office and I often work (...
0 votes
2 answers
572 views

Becoming more social in life and at workplace [closed]

I work in a large office with many coworkers. I am not a very social person. But, would like to change this and build better relationships in life (not limited to workplace). Is there anyone here who ...
63 votes
9 answers
17k views

Is it appropriate to speak up for a team member who can't drink due to addiction recovery when a company event is being planned?

I am the team lead of a team of ten. One of my team members in the past has undergone counseling due to alcohol abuse / excessive drinking. He has since recovered, but no longer drinks. Senior ...
-2 votes
5 answers
2k views

tell direct report to come to social event

I am a mid level manager. I have a direct report that doesn't talk much. I want him to socialize with the team. Is it okay to tell him in private that he needs to start either socializing more or ...
102 votes
14 answers
48k views

Do I have to attend a work Christmas party?

I've just started a new job, which I'm enjoying. I recently received an email, asking all employees to choose what they would like to eat at the work Christmas party. I personally would not choose to ...
1 vote
2 answers
752 views

Should you remain seated or stand up when someone at a workplace networking comes to speak to you?

I'm a recent graduate and just completed my vacation work at one of the big Accounting firms. On Friday, they had a social/drinks which was really just to chat and network amongst the team. If you are ...
5 votes
3 answers
2k views

What are the social expectations when leaving a job in the UK?

It's the last week at my current job and I was wondering about the exact social protocols / expectations for leaving employees in the UK. I'm leaving on good terms and everyone knows it's happening. ...
35 votes
6 answers
9k views

As an introvert, how do I connect with co-workers at a new job?

I just started a job at an insurance company. The problem I'm having is that I don't talk to my co-workers unless it's work related. I'm new in the office and all of them are already friends. As the ...
8 votes
5 answers
2k views

How to socialise when you are from a third world country?

I am from one of these countries that have a very bad reputation regarding human rights, women rights. (But differently not me) I got a job in the Netherlands I am in my 5th week Employees try to ...
5 votes
4 answers
2k views

Is it OK not to socialize with the coworker in the public transport from and to work and use this time for reading and learning? [closed]

There's so much I want to read and so little time to do it. Is it okay to use my commuting time for reading and not for socializing with co-worker(s) that sometimes share the same transport? I ...
74 votes
13 answers
19k views

Is opting out of "fun" office charity activites socially and professionally acceptable in a small company?

Note: this questions is specifically about charity activity and not social events generally. I work in a small startup which recently grew to 14 people which apparently seems to be enough for "...
3 votes
3 answers
1k views

How to handle social interactions with someone I fired for poor performance?

I fired someone for poor performance several months ago, and they haven't signed their severance paperwork yet so I am actively worried about litigation. I saw last weekend that they just joined my ...
1 vote
1 answer
488 views

Best way to be friends with people at work in a new country

How can I get more involved with people at work? I wouldn't want to come off as desperate of course and I am not. However, I feel it is important to do it here especially since I anyway know very few ...
2 votes
2 answers
685 views

Working on independent projects, should I still spend time/ hang around with my competency team?

I am working on 3 separate projects that are linked under my competency's team but are completely separate/independent from that team's major project. I have been a part of the team for almost a year ...
6 votes
5 answers
2k views

Is being anti social a serious hinderance in my career? How to cope with it?

OK So I am looking for a job right now, was out of the country for some time and now back in trying to settle. I am a software engineer with 10+ years of experience, I am having a bit of hard time ...
16 votes
6 answers
5k views

How do I unfriend a co-worker? [duplicate]

TL;DR; I want to unfriend a coworker for her overly attached behavior, but she is also a QA of some of the projects that I develop. I was dragged into a group of 4 girls at work without me trying to ...
4 votes
2 answers
640 views

What do I do when a newly-hired manager occasionally dispensed praise and accolades towards me?

I work as a programmer in the information technology area. A new employee was hired to be a manager of an adjacent department, where the department is a 'customer' of my work. They request various ...
2 votes
3 answers
743 views

Is a appropriate to greet someone as they are leaving the washroom?

In the morning, I typically greet every coworker I see with a simple "good morning" or they will greet me first in such a way. Say I'm walking to my desk and a coworker happens to leave the washroom ...
9 votes
7 answers
2k views

Company Christmas party coming soon, but I am new to the company and having panic attacks. How can I handle this?

I’m new to a role (started 4 weeks ago) and our work Christmas party is soon. Although I’ve spoken to most of the people I’m yet to be ‘in a group’ and the thought of going to a party where I’ll be on ...
28 votes
7 answers
7k views

Adjusting to a team with conflicting socialisation preferences for a group dinner

I started a new job half a year ago. I am very satisfied, there's just one thing. The team is pretty outgoing and they like to go out for a dinner together once or twice a month. I don't mind that, ...
3 votes
1 answer
472 views

How to avoid feeling alone when working from home? [duplicate]

So, I've been working on this company as a software developer for almost 2 years now and lately, we've been changed to a home office regime, which was great at first but now I'm starting to miss ...
65 votes
5 answers
13k views

Responding to social invitations with autism

So I have been told that there will be a Christmas Party happening at my work. I have autism I really do not like this sort of thing. This is my first ever job and I am really enjoying it. I have ...
5 votes
5 answers
1k views

How to get more liked by colleagues?

I'm not well liked by colleagues. And this doesn't happen to me for the first time unfortunately. I will try to be objective in my description: I have friends and social networks outside of work, so ...
53 votes
7 answers
10k views

Boss Cheating at Fantasy Football

My boss started a fantasy football league this year with a $20 buy-in with winner-take-all. I don't particularly care for football, but I signed up thinking it would be a good way to socialize with ...
14 votes
6 answers
2k views

How to exclude myself from informal activities with colleagues?

This may sound bad but please consider that I'm truly uncomfortable with these kinds of activities. I'm a junior software developer, I work with an amazing team and I get along with everyone. I'm ...
6 votes
6 answers
2k views

Fired employee allowed to go to company picnic

I worked for a company for over 3 years and was fired (not for cause). My daughter works there as well. It's time for the company picnic and she wants me to go with her (she is unmarried and high-...
6 votes
4 answers
893 views

Should I make an event at work to celebrate my soon-to-be-wedding?

So it's my first time getting married (hope the only one) but I started a new job in a foreign country where I don't know the habits in term of mini events in workplace. I work in Germany and since I ...
12 votes
6 answers
2k views

Professionalism regarding sharing Steam account info

I've found myself in somewhat of an awkward situation, or at least it seems that way to me. Personally, I like to metaphorically wear two outfits: one for when I'm not at work and one when I'm doing ...
3 votes
3 answers
317 views

how can I help my team be included in company social events?

I manage a small team of myself and 2 others. The other software engineering teams at my organization tend to all get along and interact with each other socially a lot, while my team members are ...
61 votes
4 answers
10k views

Declining welcome lunch invitation at new job due to Ramadan

I am starting a new position next month and I have been kindly invited to a team lunch. I would love to go, but due to the month of Ramadan I will be fasting during the day - no food or drinks allowed....
110 votes
15 answers
21k views

How to stop co-workers from teasing me because I know Russian?

I work on a team of 8 people for a U.S financial company, and a few weeks ago, a business meeting with some clients overseas was taking place. My manager asked us in an e-mail if anyone can speak and ...
2 votes
5 answers
896 views

How to balance my talkings with colleagues inside the workplace?

I'm working in a company as the only software developer and my co-workers which do website data entry need to talk to each other to proceed with their tasks. My salary is about 4 times of them. So I ...
0 votes
1 answer
265 views

Can work mandate social activities in South Africa [closed]

Can management force you to partake in social activities in South Africa i.e. can employers make social activities (or part of it) mandatory? Is there any legislation that can assist me and if so can ...
-1 votes
3 answers
690 views

Party game to help learn coworkers' names and positions [closed]

I had suggested we host an ice cream social at my work, so I have been tasked with handling all the details. We have a lot of new faces, so management wants me to incorporate a short game/party ...
5 votes
4 answers
2k views

Survival without Linkedin profile in software industry [closed]

Internet is full of advantages of having a linkedin profile. I, despite being a software engineer, don't feel comfortable (and feel anxious a lot - extremely panic feeling) broadcasting myself and my ...
3 votes
4 answers
4k views

How do I stop my co-workers from teasing me with another co-worker?

I have been working for more than 3 years now with my co-worker and people have been teasing us here and there and it doesn't make me happy, at all. Things have gone awkward to the point where I can't ...
1 vote
3 answers
465 views

Asking boss and co-workers to involve me more often

First, the context: I work in a small company (~12 people) where almost everyone works together for more than 10 years (some for more almost 20 years) and I'm by far the youngest person. I work there ...
91 votes
11 answers
18k views

Ramifications of not inviting a teammate I don't like to my personal function

I'm a female employee, and I have a baby shower coming up next week. I wish to invite my colleagues to the party. But there is one guy in my team I don't like, because he used to keep staring at me. ...
4 votes
2 answers
2k views

Asking interviewer out on a casual lunch date [closed]

I have recently attended an interview; it went on pretty well. Both of us liked the technical discussion and I was offered a job too. But, I rejected it as the salary negotiation with the HR was not ...
8 votes
2 answers
1k views

My boss is trying to be my friend. How should I handle this?

I started a new job as a software developer at a small (~50 people) company in October, and my new project manager (boss) started a month after I did. He's the outgoing, touchy-feely type; I can't ...
1 vote
1 answer
1k views

I am a personal assistant for a blind person and not sure how to deal with this problem [closed]

I work as a personal assistant for an older blind person, I will call her KK. This is a new job for me. She is very extroverted and has a lot of friends. The thing is that her male friends are all ...
1 vote
3 answers
729 views

How can I plan a Christmas party when there seems to be no suitable date?

So I've been asked to plan a Christmas party for my department (roughly 40 people). I have three requirements: The party has to be before December 25th. The main boss has to be available on the ...
16 votes
3 answers
2k views

Can I gracefully skip part of a work outing?

I have just started a job 4 days ago (hooray!). The model of my team is a "startup within a big corporation," so we work in a coworking space separate from the main campus, people are in and out a lot,...
100 votes
11 answers
22k views

I don't want to pay for a work social event, how should I respond if asked why I declined?

My company wants to hold its first ever social event over the weekend at someone's house. At first I accepted the invitation, although I wasn't at all into it, but then I learned that all the costs ...
-1 votes
5 answers
715 views

Consequences of not attending work offsite day as a contractor? [duplicate]

The scenario is the whole office (30 people) is having an off-site day at park, like a (catered) picnic. It’s not a teamwork type of retreat, though I’m sure a side effect is better teamwork in the ...
53 votes
10 answers
12k views

How do I explain that I am in the office to work, not to have fun?

Our office has a ping-ping table, and I am occasionally invited to play during work hours. Meanwhile my co-workers will often take a few minutes out of the day to chat about their homes, families, ...