Episode #125 of the Stack Overflow podcast is here. We talk Tilde Club and mechanical keyboards. Listen now

Hot answers tagged

258

That question is a hard read - I've been through similar experiences to you, although in different circumstances. The answer to your question; How can I keep going? DON'T Or at least - not in the current circumstances. It's clear you've pushed yourself as far as you can go. It sounds like there's nothing else that you specifically can give that may ...


223

I have been through this and at the time I still thought I was 12 feet tall and bullet-proof. I didn't listen to the signs and ended up destroying my health, my career, and my family. I hope I have your attention at this point because your situation is almost EXACTLY the same as mine was, right down to the miscarriage. Here's what you need to do: Take a ...


134

In short, no, you should not remove an account number or refuse pay. You must be doing something right, because if you were really doing a bad job, you would be fired. It is understandable to feel like you aren't doing any good work or you are burned out, but the ultimate decision on how you are performing comes down to the company. If you really need ...


76

Employees should not suffer from bad management, unrealistic deadlines or an understaffed environment. Your team is probably suffering from this. Imagine if you had to build a pyramid and normally you're whipped 100 times a day but because the Pharaoh wants it to be ready very soon you have to spend twice the amount of time being bullied around and get ...


69

It should be easy if you put forth the right mindset. You know that it will be over soon, so nothing should bother you. Therefore, with all the concerns of corporate BS being gone, you can focus on the work as it is literally the only thing that matters now. At the risk of sounding grim, many people who have a terminal illness can become very positive ...


50

As per my comment, I would genuinely suggest you visit a doctor and have them sign you off due to stress. Given that you're experiencing physical symptoms, such as pain in the left arm and a tight chest, it's really important you go and at least have a chat with a medical professional.


37

I'm stuck in a dead-end web developer job where I don't get paid much and rarely get to learn anything new. Software developers are in such high demand right now that there is really no reason why you or any other developer should stay at a low-paying or miserable job. Keep an eye out for job openings in your area or wherever you are willing to move. If ...


35

How can I politely ask my employer not to give it to me until I feel that I have improved? Chances are good that's illegal. I'm not a lawyer, or even an HR person, but there are state laws governing pay, including how often they're required to pay you. They can't just decide to not pay you. Any decent company would not want their reputation tied to this ...


34

About 3 years ago I pushed myself until I did end up in the hospital. I had all the classic signs of a heart attack. I had a coworker take me to the ER where the Dr told me, luckily, I just had a stress induced panic attack, so I feel I have some understanding of this problem. When is it appropriate to take sick leave/vacation time do to work stress / fear ...


30

Financially, their hands are tied and if they could hire additional programmers to help, they would. It is very likely in a month or two we will be in a much better financial situation but I just... can't push myself to keep going. No. Just No. Even small companies are not tied up that way. If it is very probable that the company is better off in one or ...


28

Be honest, but put the best face on that honesty. For example: "I achived a lot at company X over those three years and then decided I needed a break. I took some time off to work on some passion projects and refresh my technical skills. Now I'm ready to take on a new challenge, and that's where you come in!" This is saying the same thing as "I burned ...


28

There is a very plain and simple fact here: You can't go on like this. That's a fact. There's no need to discuss it. Any answer that I could give you or that you could give yourself that ignores this fact is pointless. So that's the starting point. (There is the alternative that you kill yourself by going on in your job like you do now; I won't consider that)...


27

You taking time off is an idea that your boss thinks is great in theory, but in practice she is never going to suggest you take a particular day or week off. You will need to suggest it. I don't recommend demanding as a first strategy. Look back over the last year. Is there a pattern of lulls? For example, after a major project is pushed out? After a year ...


24

This is probably going to sound harsh but here it is: Regarding your family: "I feel like I'm short changing them." You are. There is no nice way to sugarcoat this. You have overextended yourself at work, and your family is most definitely losing out because of it. You are so burned out that you are barely able to keep your self together, and in this ...


23

Get examples of other things the previous manager did and mitigate the issues. Don't just do the opposite, but try to get to the root problem. If the problem was artificial goals; get them involved with the setting of goals and schedule. If it was too many hours each week; increase the breadth and depth of the team, that will ease the burden on each team ...


22

The market seems to be valuing you higher than you think you're worth. You should take the money. First, it's odd to reject compensation. You will raise red flags with management. It's just strange behavior. Second, it's not unethical to decline compensation but you will set a terrible precedent. They will remember this and may decide not to offer ...


21

I - like yourself - experience panic attacks under similar circumstances, and often feel like I have nowhere else to go and cannot do anything to overcome it. I agree with the other posters that seeking help from a mental health professional is a good idea, and is something I myself do. You may not find the right person straight away, but don't despair - if ...


20

Right, so first thing's first: you ask whether the location distinguishes this from a "normal" crunch but that's hardly the only thing. Crunch time has different meanings in different industries but even in sectors where crunch time is common like game development, 16 (plus?!) hour workdays are completely insane. There are dozens of valid arguments against ...


20

TL;DR: You can improve your motivation by addressing your burnout Hopefully you will get a new job tomorrow, but in case it takes more than a few days (it may be weeks or longer), you need to also work on fixing your burnout to protect and repair your physical and emotional health. Doing so will help you continue to work to the best of your ability in your ...


19

It seems that in every profession except software development people have got the message that working overtime will reduce your productivity. And not just the productivity per hour, but absolute productivity. Of course the exact same thing happens in the software industry. Except that many managers, and unfortunately many employees, haven't got the ...


19

If you love the job, the people and it has a great future ahead of you you can do this to mitigate your stress: Hard limits Hard limits on hours spent You set yourself a limit, you say: I will only work 36 hours. when my day ends, it ends. No matter if the server room burns down, clients can't pay or the damned thing isn't finished yet. Keep yourself to ...


16

Basically, you need to deal with the source of the problem, not treat the symptom (stress). Having some time off is just going to mean you are returning to the same stressful issues compounded because they have been neglected in the time you have been away. This situation should be dealt with by figuring out... If your workload and/or work environment is ...


15

In addition to the existing answers regarding a reevaluation of the question whether this position is right for you and the possibility of donating a part of your salary, it is also possible that you have impostor syndrome. It seems that you hold yourself to higher standards than your boss does. (Unless he should also be unhappy with your performance but ...


15

Your asking this question raises major concerns about your health. I don't mean that as a criticism; mental health is incredibly important and the earlier you can intervene, the more problems you will save yourself. I went through a health collapse a few years ago, and one of the effects was that I felt strongly about all sorts of ethical issues that ...


15

The first thing you need to to do today is seek medical help. Go talk to a psychologist about your burnout and get him or her to put you on short-term disability for a 2 weeks to a month. You have a medical issue that you need to fix. In my experience, your office/managers will never believe you are burned out until you seek medical treatment for it. I had ...


14

More senior positions that come with significantly increased pay require more work. In other news: snow is cold, and the Pope is Catholic. That said I think right now you've got a skewed level of study - there's a certain amount that is going to be due to you having to catch up to the other seniors on the learning curve. I'd expect over time this will ease ...


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