New answers tagged

2

A very useful piece of advice I've received is this: The type of person who never stops talking unless someone cuts them off is used to people cutting them off. It's not rude to interrupt those people, because that's the only way they ever stop talking. Even if they're in the middle of a thought, which they almost always are, jump in and steal the ...


3

For example, instead of telling me "Please import the files into the system in the pdf directory", they would call and tell me to share my screen and would say "Please click here, then click here, now expand this plus sign, unarchive that zip file I prepared...". This has happened multiple times. My first reaction to this was to think &...


3

The best interview is the one where the interviewer does all the talking Count your blessings, you're trying to get a job, not have an enjoyable time.


0

Caveat: I am not a trained HR person, but for the last 15 years, I've been in positions of hiring. So I might not know what trained HR people are looking for, but I know what I look for. Unless you are very lucky, you will not get to choose who you work with very often. I recommend a mindset where you view each interview as your chance to sell yourself. If, ...


6

Any ways to handle this, or is just best to avoid working with people like this? Usually when you are considering a new job it is positive to get quite a lot of detail on such job, because that will help you make a good decision and not regret learning some information later on. However, if for you things like these, being long-winded, tangential, etc., are ...


0

I do know the phenomenon you are describing. There is a whole generation of tech recruiters who think "programmers are fungible" and that specialization in software engineering does not exist. You need to make it clear that you are only interested in certain kinds of jobs and that they are literally wasting their time if they approach you with ...


0

I refuse to meet a recruiter face-to-face, even over Zoom, until they answer my questions in an email. Good recruiters respect that. If they don't answer my questions, I don't reply. Unless they ask why they haven't heard from me. Then I copy-paste my unanswered questions. If they are repeat offenders, I block them. In tech, it's a seller's market. Far too ...


1

Don't worry to much about if you are being rude or not, I worked for a recruitment agency recently for around 4 years and I had to deal with hundreds of candidates daily among many other tasks and recruiters expect the majority of the candidates that they contact to either be uninterested or impatient with them. Recruitment consultants will always try to ...


3

It might sound hard to hear, reading through your question it does sound like you are your own worst enemy in your current position. Off the bat I would be careful using the term overqualified when discussing your perceived skills. While you might have technical skills that exceed what is required, but do you possess the other personal competencies needed ...


8

This situation does not require conflict. It requires humanity. You don't need to argue or oppress anyone. You need to talk to them as humans. They're people, and you're automatically assuming negative intent when they simply may not be aware because by your own admission in this question you're too craven to speak up. You're indicating you're a senior ...


5

Stand Up for Yourself For example, instead of telling me "Please import the files into the system in the pdf directory", they would call and tell me to share my screen and would say "Please click here, then click here, now expand this plus sign, unarchive that zip file I prepared...". This has happened multiple times. This will continue ...


0

this is his problem It's best to ignore anything that could create a potential conflict. Any further action could also be misunderstood. Let the coworker deal with it.


3

How to deal with condescending behaviour from coworkers when I am overqualified for the job? Like any other issue you control it by focusing on the work not the people. It's just a mental shift that needs to be made. Eventually some people realise you already know a lot and stop trying to spoon feed you, but realistically it's harmless stuff that just doesn'...


4

Well... plenty of reasons why your coworker is upset. Bringing up "issues" in a project is always a criticism of what the person working on it before did. You don't criticize someone in front of their boss, without talking to them first. You were assigned to help your coworker with their project. Instead of doing that, you assigned them a task. ...


2

Your manager obviously thinks that you would benefit from some self-training and that of course this would also benefit his team and the company as a whole. Don't dismiss "suggestions" like that: act on them. It's the manager's job to know what the teams are doing, how hard they're working, how they're spending their time. It's also his job to ...


5

Just tell them Seriously, just tell them that you want to know details that are relevant to you (like the technological stack) before you accept the invitation for further talks. Keep in mind that most recruiters have merchant mentality. Your time doesn't matter to them, it doesn't matter to them if you're a good match or not and how long are you going to ...


0

If you considering changing jobs, don't use recruiters. Just refuse their offers. Take the time and read job offers! Skip the ones lacking the technology stack, and concentrate on these, which promise suitable tech stacks. Then review them and apply to the best fits. Even then, it it likely you won't work with the technology stack or only part of your time. ...


2

After reading other answers, Im going to answer this one a slightly different way. You don't want to waste time, annoy a recruiter, or poison possible future openings. The recruiter isn't technical. The possible employer has technical secrecy to consider. I'd handle it more like this - a conditional interest, conditioned upon stack, rather than a blunt ...


5

Firstly, I don't know where you are so my answer is based on experience with recruiters in countries where I've worked, the UK, Canada, Australia and New Zealand. The culture in recruitment may be different where you are. Secondly, is it possible that the reason you struggle to communicate that you're only interested in certain roles because you've taken ...


7

This conversation as you've characterized it sounds more to me like your manager gauging your desire to progress professionally and attempting to encourage that growth. The "expectation" here is that you care about growing professionally in some fashion, the insistence is someone prodding you because they want to see their employee grow in value ...


3

What others have already said is well and correct, but there is another aspect of this in regards to security. Social engineering. Social engineering deals with retrieving this sort of information (current projects of a company, in this example) for a competitor (it doesn't even have to be a company. An individual could steal the intellectual property of a ...


78

I have a different take on this than the other answers. I think it is important to realize that a recruiter is almost never a technical person, and that beyond the highest level ("we use Java") they aren't going to know the layers of a technology stack. It is also important to realize that at any firm larger than a few dozen people, there are ...


2

If they are contacting you then just be firm. Don't take the conversation beyond a few minutes on the phone or one or two emails before giving up on them. Don't agree to longer conversations, or meetings if they don't have what you want. Recruiters who reach out to you have one goal: harvesting your resume/CV or application. They might not even have a open ...


8

In what situation is it appropriate to answer with a straight "no"? Any examples where you go straight to the answer without wasting time? Just saying "no" is probably not a great way to answer your boss. Instead, something more like "Thanks for the suggestion. I'll consider it." could be dismissive enough, but equally ...


254

Bear in mind the recruiter is being rather rude by wasting your time, certainly more rude than a simple rejection saying you're only interested in moving in order to work on a specific technology stack. Tell them something along the lines of: "Thank you for your interest. At the moment I'm only interested in moving to a position where I'll be working on ...


11

Since you mentioned in the edit that this is expected to be done in your own time, a straight "no" seems entirely fine as an answer. However, you don't need to start there. Your current answers are all related to your workload, but these answers are irrelevant. Your workload is during working hours; this is going into your free time. Instead you ...


50

I am very much sidestepping the issue of context-switching, and if an hour-a-day is an effective way of learning. Your manager sets your tasks. If your manager thinks you should stop working on Task A and Task B, for an hour a day, in order for training, that is what you do. Because that is your job. Of course, you should explain to your manager that work on ...


12

I ask what the incentive is. That usually if not shutting them up, at least makes it interesting. I got a lot of certifications only because my employer was paying for them and giving me a pay rise for achieving them. So if it meant an extra 4k a year on my salary then I could find study time. If it didn't then I'm too busy.


5

You write of the standard way of doing things that "sometimes they are harmful in some way". You may well be right, but they are also extremely helpful in general. I'm getting hints that you might be looking for freedom to abandon SOLID and TDD completely on the grounds that they are "sometimes harmful". I doubt that the percentage of ...


0

Convincing a team of seasoned developers who work well together to abandon core practices like SOLID is probably never going to happen, regardless of how you tailor you communication style. They've experienced tangible benefits, and any downsides your seeing are worth it to the team. Taking your specific example, I think you're best chance at a compromise ...


9

Check out How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. It's been one of the most popular self help books for over 100 years--and with good reason. Simply from the way you phrase your question, I can tell you're approaching this from completely the wrong angle. If people feel feel they're being attacked, you've already lost. Don't "provide ...


1

Generally if you want to have productive conversations then you pick topics that people want to talk about. If you already know that they don't want to discuss something and you don't want to antagonise them or have a confrontation then don't bring it up unless asked your position or opinion on a matter.


8

I work in healthcare performance improvement. My team analyzes scheduling templates, call center metrics, no-show rates, copay collections. . . The list goes on. We've been able to institute change at every level in our organization, but by far the most stubborn group is the providers. Providers do often think they know best, and it certainly comes across as ...


-1

Are there any tactics to deal with unreceptive people in general when they will not even attempt to rationalize or work with you? Enlist help from someone with sufficient credentials that the client will listen. In this case, recruit a medical professional to work with you. Perhaps a doctor. Perhaps a university professor who teaches medicine.


4

Here's the thing about doctors: When an administrative assistant changes a process, if they are wrong, the business might lose a few thousand dollars. That can be recovered by reversing the process change, sure it sucks but it's not a big deal. In medicine, if a doctor changes a process or approves a process change, people can literally die. Therefore, ...


1

How to preemptively tell employer what you expect to get paid when there's potential for confusion/miscalculations There should be no potential for confusion or miscalculation. Your payrate, overtime, and bonus should all already be written into your contract/employment agreement. If you are required to report your hours worked to your manager then you ...


0

First off, I wouldn't call the overtime rate a "bonus", as bonus implies its discretionary. Personally, I would simply wait for the paycheque to arrive. If they get it wrong, that's just something they'll have to spend time fixing. If you were inclined to email them before the paycheque, there is no real way to do this without implying you don't ...


1

Here's a potential tactful way to approach the subject: Simply walking up to your boss and demanding she speak "normal[sic]" introduces a real chance for interpersonal problems. This method could come across as placing fault on your superior, and if done poorly could be seen as confrontational or intolerant. To be extra cautious, the subject can be ...


1

Why talking is not a good idea I believe that talking to your boss about it, in most cases, can risk damaging your relationship with her. If none of your team members have expressed similar concerns to her, she will be self-conscious when speaking to you as opposed to your other teammates. Moreover, I do not see how talking to her would change anything. It ...


4

TL/DR: there are other aspects of talking/hearing besides pure accent. Learn to ask some questions that make it easier for you to understand. I (sometimes) have this issue with no other than my wife! We are both native Spanish speakers and in my country there are no big accent diferencies from one region to another. That's why I want to add tho the current ...


19

You can put the onus on yourself by continuing to say "I'm sorry, and excuse me, then add :"I have trouble with accents" I'm hearing impaired and it's VERY hard for me to understand accents, so I am used to pointing out politely that I don't understand. If she is embarrassed about her accent, make light of it and say it's no big deal. Don't ...


7

Definitely do mention it, as it's a productivity issue; if you can't understand her then you can't do your work effectively. She's also probably wondering why she has to constantly repeat herself and, worst case, may think you may be borderline incompetent for having to constantly as for clarification. So this is something you should raise. Now, the ...


3

I concur with others saying to bring it up and phrase it as your issue; my go-to is to explain that I'm hard of hearing, so it's generally easiest for me if communication is primarily written. It's difficult to be offended by someone else saying "this is a weakness of mine," and one cannot expect your hearing to magically improve.


5

That's a pretty common issue when you work in an industry as global as this. You'll learn to understand her better in time, but I wouldn't address it directly. It wouldn't achieve anything and I doubt your boss even notices, let alone is offended when you have to ask her to repeat herself.


55

Is it better to speak up and let her know this is a challenge for me? If so, what is the best way to do it? That depends on your relationship with your boss. You've been there for six months, so you must have some sense of how she would receive a request to talk more slowly during your one-on-one meetings so that you can understand her. If she is likely to ...


13

Is it better to speak up and let her know this is a challenge for me? If so, what is the best way to do it? Yes - you should mention the communication-issue since it does already affect productivity - your next 1 on 1 would be an opportunity. "When we have 1-on-1 meetings, I'm constantly having to say "pardon me?", "what was that?",...


5

In case you worry a lot about "what will people think", I just want to add - Please learn to speak up and express yourself without overly worrying about what other people think. You have no idea what someone will think of you because everyone has a different personality and life experience. It's a huge unreasonable burden you take upon yourself ...


16

When would be a good time, if any to make the company aware of this? Right away. If you don't want to seem arrogant, just let them know privately by email. In other words, give them the information now, and let them decide whether you should still train with the others, whether you should try to get the next level in the certificate, or whether you should ...


4

What is the best way to communicate him about this? Let them know as soon as possible, that you changed your mind, apologize, and move on. You can provide as much detail / background/ reasoning as you want, that's not going to change the fact that you're not joining them and they need to find someone else for that position. Do not delay any further to ...


4

As with every other time this question is asked here: Will bridge get burned? Yes. You gave your word, you are breaking it. If there's actually a reason you can't join (e.g. a medical issue which you have to deal with) then explain that and the bridge might only be slightly charred. If it's actually just that you're choosing not to join (e.g. because you ...


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