264

Why hide it? Yes, your boss was intoxicated, but you don't want to have issues because you didn't mention something you full well knew and they then find out later. Just make sure to explain exactly what happened to the new manager. If I was informed the previous boss, who was sent on sick leave, had told someone, while in an intoxicated state, that they ...


199

Let's start by taking about two steps further back: If you have a team that is so deadlocked that a single person can make the headway you've described, you have a dysfunctional team. It just isn't possible that a single person is so much "better" than a group of talented professionals. Something is seriously wrong there. You either have an ...


190

Usually for me, the following simple phrase suffices: I wasn't feeling too great yesterday, but am feeling a bit better today. Thank you for asking As your coworkers are supportive, the odds are they want to know that you're OK - you don't need to disclose any more than that to them. If you show gratitude for their concern and indicate that you're ...


165

Question: am I supposed to reply to urgent work emails even if I am not fit for work? No. You decided you weren't fit enough mentally to be working, and your doctor and HR agreed to put you on leave so that you could not work, and so that you could spend your time recovering. So stop working and recover. Stop checking emails. Doing anything else risks ...


150

Tell your team lead. If you’re in a place where you can get so disassociated that you think a meeting is over when it isn’t, odds are that self-monitoring isn’t going to work, because the very mental mechanisms that you’d use for self-monitoring are the ones that are impaired. If you’ve got a good boss, they’ll work out a plan to help you cope if you start ...


132

In short, no, you should not remove an account number or refuse pay. You must be doing something right, because if you were really doing a bad job, you would be fired. It is understandable to feel like you aren't doing any good work or you are burned out, but the ultimate decision on how you are performing comes down to the company. If you really need ...


113

I haven't consulted a doctor yet This is the key phrase in what you wrote. You indicate that you are having "health issues" which are severe enough such that you and others see it impacting your work and severe enough that it compelled you to post here. Worry about your health first, then worry about work later. Get yourself to a medical facility and get ...


113

There's a very simple way of conveying that you have an appointment: Hey boss, I often have appointments scheduled for 6 PM. It takes me about an hour to get to them, and so I'd really like to take advantage of our flex time policy to come in 10 minutes early, and leave at around 4:50, such that I make it on time. Could we talk about it? If you don't ...


101

What's the correct thing to do? Do not continue talking to HR about this, they are not your friend. HR exists to protect the company. Should I tell HR that I am having a very, very tough time, or just shut up, deal with it and work poorly? At this point, you have already shined the HR spot light on you, I would not draw further attention from them. ...


92

I think Alison has a good answer for this, from a person who was interested in moving into management: If they were fresh scars, indicating that it was ongoing, I think that would be on people’s minds, and their concern for you would probably get in the way of being able to see you in a management role. But they’re older scars, so I really wouldn’t worry ...


91

am I supposed to reply to urgent work emails even if I am not fit for work? If you are on sick leave, you are not supposed to check emails. You are on sick leave, not on standby. As you are not checking emails, you cannot reply, no matter how "urgent" it may be.


87

My small firm faced this with an employee. We had (and I hope that you do, too) disability insurance coverage which pays (some of, but it's tax free so it is supposed to work out the same) a person's salary when they can't work. I suggest that you suggest to either this person or your manager that they go on disability leave for a while. This has the ...


82

You shouldn't have to cope with this. Yelling at colleagues or underlings is extremely unprofessional. You should never have to bring this up in interviews, and if a colleague (including a manager) yells at you the correct response is to: State, calmly, that they are being incredibly unprofessional and you consider this discussion to be done. (If you think ...


72

Proceed as though the conversation with your impaired boss never happened. Also, I don't see how you're at risk legally in this situation. (Although I am not an attorney.) If he went out on medical leave, what appeared to be drunken behavior may have been some other medical condition. I would put that conversation out of your mind and focus on your tasks....


58

Have you tried asking him how to make code reviews more tolerable for him? Using the examples you listed above, what if they went more like this? Employee A - This variable X, I think maybe it would be clearer for everyone if it was TotalSalesThisWeek. Is it ok for me to rename it? Employee B - [asks questions until they understand the code and grasp the ...


58

I would go in a completely different route than most people are saying here: I would set up a separate meeting with HR ASAP. There are two issues here: The way you were treated by your intoxicated manager and the effect that has on the company. The work that you do and that your team does. The issue with being fired (and the reason given!!) is related to ...


52

I could only find one actual question in your post How do I convince the people in charge to just cut their losses? I don't think you can. Senior management has demonstrated repeatedly that they are not willing to listen to reason and that they value their bizarre cultural approach above proven success, logic and actual data. They have burned the bridge ...


50

I go on holiday at times when I would be perfectly fine to work, and therefore perfectly fine to enjoy my holiday. I take sick leave when I'm not capable of working (or if there is something infectious, if it makes me inefficient and would be bad if passed on to everyone else in the office). By the way you describe it, you were not capable of working. So ...


44

Personal issues are exactly that. Personal issues. If they can do their job, great. If they can do their job, but at rather mediocre performance, it might be a good idea to keep them on anyway, after all "average" is good enough and they might get better when their problems are over. But if their performance is seriously bad and they still want to ...


44

This is what HR is for, in this case: HR IS YOUR FRIEND This person is suffering from an illness which is affecting his performance. Most HR departments have access to, or can direct an employee to mental health services, which this person seems to be in desperate need of. Be prepared to replace him with a temp, as he may not be able to work while he's ...


43

Is there a more tactful route I can take that doesn't involve (as much) lying? It is none of their business, do not lie about it. Lying is never a good idea, and almost always comes back to bite you. I would urge you to simply say "I was not feeling well, but I feel fine today." and then change the conversation with another line like "Did I miss ...


38

I had TERRIBLE withdrawal from sertraline. SO.... Don't just quit without the supervision of your doctor TELL NOBODY ON THE JOB. It's not their business Be prepared to take a sick day or two if you're not feeling right. Even with your Psychiatrist dropping you down slowly, you can still get withdrawal, be very aware of the side effects and if you feel ...


35

How can I politely ask my employer not to give it to me until I feel that I have improved? Chances are good that's illegal. I'm not a lawyer, or even an HR person, but there are state laws governing pay, including how often they're required to pay you. They can't just decide to not pay you. Any decent company would not want their reputation tied to this ...


34

Human Resources can't help you with this. That isn't their role. HR's job is to look out for the interests of the company and make sure the employees aren't causing problems. They aren't counselors and are not able to help you with your mental health issues. If your workload is giving you problems, you need to talk to your manager and work with them to find ...


34

My honest, personal answer to your plight, rather than your question, is to invite the guy for a beer and ask him if his new company is looking for people like you. But your question was how to convince senior management. They have already refused your rational and - based on the information you have given - IMHO correct assessment. So you can't win by ...


31

In the circumstances, seeing a mental health professional seems like an action you should take irrespective of your employer's demands. When you find one, discuss with them (not necessarily as your top priority though), what the normal 'back to work' procedure in similar circumstances is in your country. They have been trained in how to discuss their ...


31

This doesn’t really have anything to do with the mental state of the senior developer - he could have been hit by a bus or won the lottery and it would be the same problem. You just have not enough people to do the work needed, so that’s where your PM has to start doing his job and manage. Two essential things he needs to do: Don’t allow anyone to take the ...


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