It's just another night, you're not the first or last to feel this way.
This is perhaps straying too far into Interpersonal.SE territory, but as someone who suffers anxiety and similarly had panic attacks at their first work Christmas Party (and team day out, and company bus trip to the cinema, and team lunch, and performance review meeting...) - the best ...
Your best option is to telephone first and email confirmation of that communication immediately thereafter.
In the telephone call, explain that there was an indication that there would be a delay between filing the paperwork and the commencement, and that you have an obligation that you cannot neglect.
When I commenced with my current employer, I was ...
Due to other commitments, including my previous job, I cannot start
tomorrow. I can take a day off the following day, and officially begin
the next week. How can I tactfully convey this to my new manager?
Say it exactly the way you wrote it here. And make sure you say what you want your actual start date to be.
But you really should always come to an ...
It's definitely best to do this through a phone call, and be sure to couch your situation in terms of your responsibility to your previous employer. If part of the reason is that you have a personal commitment I'd encourage you to skip over that. Focus on the professional reasons that you have a conflict.
If it's giving you this much anxiety perhaps it is smart to announce you are not going. They might be able to cancel the food that was ordered for you.
You did not specify when the party is, but if it's for example 21 December, you would have to remain in this state of panic and fear for almost 2 weeks. And I doubt that's good for your mental health.
Tell them: you have nothing to lose
There are four cases:
If you tell them, and they hire you anyway, it's a great sign: that is a nice company, accommodating to your human life and needs.
If you tell them, and they don't hire you… would you really want to work for them?
If you do not tell them, they hire you, and then they do not make a fuss about it, it ...
Too many people here are talking about legalities and sticking it to the man, swindle as much as you can. This is not the way to live life.
The question you're asking is if it is ethical and moral to try and swindle and deceive a company that is going above and beyond to recruit you, with a massive 50k pay increase.
I question the morals of the people ...
On the one hand I agree with the people who say "they don't need to know", however....
It sounds like they've already been very accomodating (if they've come to the party on all other detractors you've raised), so one more little issue shouldn't be a problem if thy're so desperate to have you.
It might be worth giving some thought as to why you're even ...
Which option is no option:
Based on possible outcomes, just staying should not be your first choice, unless for personal reasons. This is because in any case, you need to talk to your new employer first.
Either they are sympathetic to your situation, then you can think about working something out.
Or they are not, in which case you know for sure. But this ...
If I were you, I'd relocate, start working, visit over weekends as possible.
Life is usually the best when it's balanced - don't forget your past, but don't kill your future before it even started, either.
Speaking as a manager of software engineers, I have to say that when we hire someone, we aren't hiring them because we expect huge productivity in their first month (or first few months) of employment. We are hiring for the long term. We do eventually expect productivity, but we know we have complex environments with a lot to learn.
We want someone who's ...
Talk to your employer, and see what's possible!
Normally I would advise against soliciting private information to your new employer, but in this case, it should not harm to discuss possibilities with them. As I see it, you can not really lose anything here.
Worst case, they can't do anything to help you. You can still decide if you want to stay and let ...
How to go about letting my upcoming employee know about the whole situation
Talk to your employer and explain your situation as best as you can. Let them know the the different errands and new responsibilities you expect to have with your family and ask them how they can accommodate for your new situation. Based on their feedback, you can then determine ...
Nobody can say for sure, but this is a feeling that many people have.
One little tip that is important:
If you learn something from person X make sure you remember it or write it down. I have often worked in companies where some employees(including younger me) would use 1 or 2 senior developers as personal Google and ask them things that were explained to ...
I think this will be a fine opportunity to "break the ice" and start getting better acquainted with your fellow workers. I suggest you consider going.
I know that this may be easier said than done, but I encourage you to make an effort and try to go and socialize and meet new people. No need to have a "smart" or "witty" topic of conversation, just be ...
Why not use this opportunity to make some more acquaintance and friends?
Don't outright reject the idea of attending the party - Go ahead, give it a try.
What's the worst that can happen - that you'll have no new acquaintance - same as now? However, look at the bright side - you may actually find out some like-minded colleagues which whom you can start ...
Ahead of time, ask somebody you know in the company to introduce you to a few people. Making these introductions is one of the jobs of supervisors. Then say, "what do you do?" Then listen. People love to talk about themselves, and they won't notice you're anxious. Seriously.
You don't have to stay long. You don't have to make excuses for not ...
You should consider what kind of rights you have around maternity pay etc. Certainly in the UK you must have worked for your employer for a certain amount of time before being entitled to the full amount of paternity/maternity pay.
My question is, should I tell the new company that I may be taking maternity leave within the first year of starting?
The simple answer is NO.
1) you are not pregnant yet, and even if no fertility issues are known, it could happen tomorrow or only a year from now.
2) In many countries (I don't know about the US) it is illegal to ask or to fire someone if ...
In the United States they can't ask, even if you are visibly pregnant.
But since you aren't pregnant there is zero reason to tell them your plans.
You will not be dishonest by keeping this private, even if it turns out you are already pregnant.
One thing to consider before deciding to switch companies, understand what leave you have with your current ...
There is no need to tell them you’re trying to get pregnant. It’s your right to try, and their risk if it happens.
To consider: what will your current company do if you get pregnant? Will you get maternity leave, get your job back when you return to work? Same at the new place?
The new job seems an excellent opportunity even if it’...
should I tell them we're trying to get pregnant?
Nope, this is no ones business but your own.
Having said that, your new employer may not thrilled with you starting your, and then early on in your career with your new company needing to be off for maternity leave. Just keep that in mind as you make your career plans.
If you get this new role, you may ...
In my opinion (not sure of the US law, IANAL), someone's pregnancy status has nothing to do with a new job or job application.
It's a part of human life - no one is going to mark you as dishonest for availing the maternity leave (assuming you are entitled1) when you need it. The organization you want to work for, should support you in your life events, too.
Do I have to persevere, until I get to understand things better
I have been developing software, as a freelancer for *cough* decades, and there is a point in every project, usually after 3 or 4 weeks, where I feel hopeless & think that I will never learn it. This passes every time, and knowing that helps me prevent depression/hopelessness.
My manager seems to think it will take time for me to deal with everything, and it's okay for him to explain me everything I need, and that I'm not really productive right now.
You seem to be in good company and management, most of the folks complains about just the opposite. You manager understands your situation and extending the help they can to bring ...
I have taken a break too and it was a good 4.5+ years.
This is how I mentally prepared myself. 'No matter what my skills are, there is a job for everyone in this world'. With that in my mind, I took concrete steps to get back in the industry.
I looked at my original skill set, looked at the documentation of each for the latest versions and spent enough ...
As a person in that very job, I can tell you that general use of PHP hasn't changed that much. Assuming you used MySQL it hasn't changed at all as per Oracle's MO (However the codebase has been forked a few times e.g. MariaDB, adding a bunch of new features).
For the frontend, quite a lot has changed:
You don't necessarily need to update at all, at least before looking for work. The state of play has obviously shifted since 2011, but not to the extent you couldn't pick up (for example) the modern parts of PHP on the job.
Of course, another potential opportunity would be working on a reasonably old PHP codebase (there's lots around) where knowledge of any ...
they haven't received any confirmation from their project and that they'd contact me
A MNC has a lot of moving parts, schedules, and agendas for things to take a long time. What they told you basically was, you were selected for that project but we don't know if we need you yet.
You do not have an offer.
Keep interviewing, keep looking for jobs. Put this ...
Unlikely. When you are a student, the expectation is your studies take priority. Internships exist to teach students about the working world and give the company a bit of a labour boost while you're at it. And hey, after your studies are done and you've proven to be an asset, maybe they might help you skip the job hunting stage and let you come back to work ...
This may vary between different cultures but most probably and extremely likely:
NO, you are a student in their eyes and supposed to prioritize your studies. Short employments are expected. It would probably look good to have one of those continued employments from internship because that tells to them that you have shown your capabilities during the ...
Upon speaking with our HR, project-based employees will also receive their 13th month pay. We will just be getting it late compared to regular employees. I'm glad we are also covered in this. It seems that all employees(regardless of the nature of employment) are covered in this bonus, as stated in the link that I attached in my question. Thanks!
they said due to their policy being to not disclose this
They genuinely said that their policy is not to tell a candidate how much they will be paid?! A reasonable answer to that is "I can't tell you how many days a week I'll work for you if you can't tell me how much you're paying".
It does not have to be all in the same letter - they can write the ...
If I provide links for repositories, the resume looks full of links. What is the best way to handle this situation?
Although there are variety of ways to put links on resume like: Using URL shortening service, cutting www or http, there is one more simple way to handle this
Embed the link into the Project Name where it appears on the resume (this fulfills ...
You shouldn't jump to conclusions after just 3 days in the company.
I felt the same way on my first job and felt isolated for the first month or so, until one of my colleagues invited me to lunch and things just worked out.
Give them some more time.
Simply put your agreed salary in writing to them. Say that you will join then subject to them paying a salary of xxxxxx. That way you are covered. Basic terms would usually be sent in an offer letter but there's nothing to stop you saying your accepting the offer based on certain conditions, it is a two way process and they don't get to call the shots.
So is this offer letter legally correct or not?
It doesn't matter. You should walk away even if it is legal.
It's already a big red flag in terms of professionalism to not by default include salary in an offer letter. But to outright refuse when pressed? You're 100% in not-legitimate territory here. There's simply no reason why this would be their policy ...
If you spend a lot of time alone, and do things alone, your colleagues will think that you want to be alone, or that you are anti-social / unsocial / asocial. Either way, they made the right decision and they respect your space.
If you want to fit into the culture and socialize with your colleagues, you need to adopt (at least partially) their way of being /...
In the future, do not accept an offer until you've seen the written contract (and possibly the employee manual if the contract refers to it in any way).
In the meantime, proceed as if you don't have a contract yet, because you don't.
Keep on interviewing with other places. Do not stop. Do not slow down.
If currently employed, do not quit until you have ...
Agree, looks super fishy.
If you have a choice, leave this company in your tracks and don't look back.
On the other hand, if you have nothing to lose and have NO other options,
go to your first day and see if they going to scam you and for how much.
Don't sign anything binding and be prepared to walk away.
P.S. Please keep us posted.
Simply point out that you cannot consider leaving your existing position until you have the received and reviewed the full details of what they are offering, including any terms or agreements they expect you to sign.
A job-offer letter is just a contract where you say "I promise to work for you" and the other parties say "in return I promise the following things..."
That is all it is. You could have a job offer that says "I promise to come and drink your coffee once a week" and "In return we promise to loudly yell insults"
This job offer would be both legal and ...
[....] the salary annexure and appointment letter will be issued on your joining.
So, basically you're expected to accept an offer and join the work without having any written proof of appointment and confirmed agreement on your payout?
Anything which is not a part of written agreement from proper authority, is not part of any agreement, at all.
If I ...
I am not a lawyer. That said, many of the existing answers and comments sounded decidedly... American... to me - something you’re often at risk of on the SE network. In my country (NZ) sharing the letter you had provided for the purpose of offering you a job with another company for a different purpose would be a breach of your privacy, and you could (at ...
This is India.
Incidents like this used to happen in the past, happening at present and WILL continue to happen in future. You cannot expect any sense of ethics from the most companies and their HR representatives.
Do not hesitate to help them realize the taste of their own medicine. Write your reviews in Glassdoor, Indeed, MouthShut, LinkedIn, ...
There are good answers, but I’m going to address more simply your “what can I do?”
You can choose to not work for either of them, and/or you can make sure other people know what kind of people they are.
I just want to chime in since every existing answer thinks you did something wrong. It's possible that in your location/field it's considered unacceptable to share information about offers, but that's certainly not always the case.
At least in the United States and with software engineers, telling a company you have an offer from another is completely 100% ...
It is noble that you intend to be transparent with your new employer. However, it's important to remember that until your girlfriend has accepted a firm offer and made a clear commitment to her potential new employer, the plans you're talking about are essentially hopes and not concrete plans.
And, to be clear, it doesn't make sense to be transparent about ...
Remember this next time someone tries to push you around.
Some people will exploit you. Some people will lie to you. Some people will take advantage of you. This is an almost inevitable certainty. You'll never be able to prevent it completely, but you can learn from past mistakes to help avoid future ones.
The next time someone tries to pressure you to ...
I do not know your location but in the US they contact your previous managers to see if you worked where you claimed you did. You can say "I no longer have contact info with my manager from 10 years ago, but here is the contact info to the company's HR."
When contacted managers often will only verify if you worked there. Of course from a phone call you ...