Hot answers tagged

150

It depends on why this employee feels the need to overwork. I've encountered several "types" and if I'm being honest have been at least one of them myself, if you can try and work out what their motivation is from their general behavior or attitude - failing that you ask them why they feel the need to be working so hard and go from there. The Martyr Some ...


148

While turning around in an exit interview and saying you're leaving because your new manager is an arse may seem like a good idea (been there, done that), it doesn't achieve anything when said directly. The question why are you leaving is for them to get feedback on why employees leave, not for you to justify why you're leaving. You could turn around and say ...


142

I think you'd best get some kind of professional (medical) diagnosis for this. It is a lot easier to go to your boss with a medical term that they can, to some extent, relate to and appreciate, rather than a vague description that they might just think means "he feels lazy some days, and wants my permission to slack off".


116

First of all, quitting is always an option. What would your colleague do if the company suddenly closed its doors? (This happens, and the employees are usually the last to see it coming). Your colleague needs to stop making excuses and start job hunting for real. It may take a long time, but there are better jobs and non-toxic managers out there. In ...


106

You don't have to say anything in that interview and a few canned responses ("looking for new opportunities", "want to grow professionally", "in search of new challenges") will do to not appear unhelpful. You are right, a judgement like "is a jerk" especially without facts to support it is not helpful at all. HR will just dismiss it. If you say your new ...


104

How do I determine whether the stress is caused by my job, or something else particular to me? I am not a doctor, but based on what little I can glean from this post, your work is not causing you undue stress. I would suggest you try one or all of the following: Unplug from work outside of working hours. Don't answer or even look at emails after ...


102

What’s the best way to rebuild trust with my boss and show that I can manage the leadership role? This isn't your fault, you were not given the tools needed to fulfill a leadership role, so you're not in one. Your boss has failed your trust that they will do their role correctly and has now been given a heads up. What to do? Apologise if necessary for ...


100

What's the correct thing to do? Do not continue talking to HR about this, they are not your friend. HR exists to protect the company. Should I tell HR that I am having a very, very tough time, or just shut up, deal with it and work poorly? At this point, you have already shined the HR spot light on you, I would not draw further attention from them. ...


92

To reduce the stress: Stop caring. After 8 hours work a day, stop working. If the manager makes it hard to leave, stop working and get overtime pay without working. If he says “I could have done that in an hour” you say “of course you could” so he doesn’t see you getting upset (because that’s what he wants) while thinking to yourself what you actually think ...


86

If you haven't already take a look at the FMLA FAQ. This is the law in the USA so the fact that the company has changed hands doesn't matter. Under qualifying conditions it says "to care for an immediate family member (spouse, child, or parent – but not a parent “in-law”) with a serious health condition" which would seem to apply. You do need to qualify ...


81

How do you take on less stress in a role than your predecessor did? Do not take your predecessor's role. Your boss in his attempt to convince you made it pretty clear that all the extra work and stress was normal and expected of the predecessor's role. He can say whatever he wants but the bottom line is if you accept this role you will likely face the ...


80

People tend to balance their output to expectations, regardless if they are high or low. Sounds to me that this person is not expected to produce much, so consequently he's not. This is a management and allocation problem - your PM/manager has no overview over which tasks are allocated to whom and apparently does no follow-up on results. Otherwise, this ...


78

My honest advice is to talk to a professional psychologist about it. You show early signs of burnout and anxiety disorder. It could be caused by your work or by something entirely different, but we won't be able to tell you what it is. The sooner you start treatment, the better your chances are to recover completely. Taking a break (be it 10 minutes or 10 ...


76

Employees should not suffer from bad management, unrealistic deadlines or an understaffed environment. Your team is probably suffering from this. Imagine if you had to build a pyramid and normally you're whipped 100 times a day but because the Pharaoh wants it to be ready very soon you have to spend twice the amount of time being bullied around and get ...


75

How should you think about this? Should I as a junior developer be stressing out about aspects of my company that I am not directly responsible for, It's not normal as a 21 year old to work constantly and never take time off. The correct way to proceed involves a few things to first understand/learn/realize: You can't be perfect in the working world. ...


74

You are jumbling up at least 3 categories of problems: those you can help with, those that you should advocate for someone to do better at, and those you need to just accept and stop worrying about, because it's making you sick. Exactly which is which depends on your company, but I can take a stab at some of them. My suggestion to you is that next time you ...


70

Do you care about your co-workers? Do they share your sentiment about the new manager? If so, be honest at the leave interview. I worked at Google many years ago and ended up in the same situation which lead to me leaving the company. When HR asked why I quit I told them about my manager. Six months later he was fired. I also told a couple of my co-workers ...


68

How to emulate, at best, a such stressful situation during an interview? You don't. That's what probation periods are for - to see how the person handles the pressure for real and if they don't then they do not pass their probation. So long as it is clear in the interview process what the work requires and that there is a probation period the result of ...


67

You're never going to eliminate this behavior entirely - some people always feel the need to be doing something regarding their "need" no matter how pointless or even potentially counter-productive it is (see the people who will sit at the back of a solid traffic jam that clearly isn't moving at all and honk their car's horn) You're probably having a ...


65

Yes, it is bad. Your instinct is right and the fact that you're asking us indicates you already know the answer. Your boss' motivation for acting like this doesn't matter. He may be a sociopath, he may be misguided, but the result is the same: you get stressed out and are miserable. And as you said even if he doesn't treat you like this now, he has shown ...


63

Something I have learned from both personal experience and observation (mostly observing my children) is that if you are convinced you can't do something, then you will struggle with it. You just don't seem to apply the brain power to it because you just know you will fail. So I will give you the same advice I give my children :) Rather than look at the ...


62

Speaking broadly, the professional behavior is to: not repeat rumors not create rumors by default assume the agreements are still valid, proceed as planned ask management for clarification, e.g. is X still the agreement? when unclear check your contract for exit conditions to know the worse case scenario in time of uncertainty increase rate of savings ...


58

I am not a legal expert, nor should you be taking legal advice from people on the Internet - you should be consulting with a lawyer. As for what advice I can give: Your working relations with other members of staff is likely to be awkward and strained - this is only natural and to be expected (after all, following your accusations, a manager is being taken ...


57

I don't have a direct answer, but I do have some additional thoughts/strategies... 1 - People are different I have worked with folks that would be stressed out no matter what the situation. I know others who are almost disturbingly cool under extremely stressful situations. Bottom line - stress level vs. reasons for stress are highly personal. So - most ...


53

Screening You can't screen for candidates who would react well under the specific stresses of your environment. At best you can select candidates who have demonstrated capability during high stress positions in the past. Even then however, as in finance, past performance is no guarantee of future performance. Transparency The most important thing is to ...


51

As per my comment, I would genuinely suggest you visit a doctor and have them sign you off due to stress. Given that you're experiencing physical symptoms, such as pain in the left arm and a tight chest, it's really important you go and at least have a chat with a medical professional.


51

I have a bit of experience with this question. I have sat in two job interviews as a candidate, and tens as an interviewer, so I do know both sides of the story. As an interviewer, I don't care if you think you're not good at interviews. You just need to give it a red hot crack. To be fair to all candidates, there needs to be a systematic and uniform ...


50

One piece of general advice to add to Oded's excellent answer, which I won't rehash: Don't engage anyone at work who wants to talk about it. There will be three categories of people: Those who don't believe you and are open about it. Those who appear supportive but aren't. Those who are genuinely supportive. It is best for you if you don't engage any of ...


47

This amount of LOC is common. I've seen much bigger (a big French bank: 173,000 COBOL programs in 2002, must be far more today, not counting new techs). Don't depress, it's part of your job to dig in, and soon you're gonna like it. In the meantime: Ask those who know. And if you don't know who knows, ask "do you know who could know?". Befriend older people, ...


44

So my question is how do we deal with this? You focus on your own work, and don't burn up valuable energy and good-will by trying to force this person to change. The fact that there are more projects, increasingly tighter deadlines and "tension" with upper management signifies a problem. It appears that the way your organization has decided to deal with ...


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