New answers tagged

0

A long-term (possible) mitigation: I used to work with both male and female muslim coworkers that had the same issue (at first). After a while (1-3 months) they all (~10 people of different age and background) developed an absolute tolerance for 1:1 meetings with a coworker of the opposite gender. They still tried their best to avoid such meetings with ...


-5

I think an Islamic woman in the USA working in cybersecurity is a red flag to begin with. Her then refusing to accept local customs or culture is another red flag. I would be really careful. Probably sideline her.


-4

An easy solution would be to honour her religion and tell her that she is more than free to organise any man from her family to sit in on the meeting as long as he does not interfere with any of the work being done and he does not expect any money from the company for doing it. It is following her archaic beliefs because apparently employers have to work ...


1

Unsure why there is any debate on this at all. If a lady does not want 1 on 1 private meetings with a man, that's totally up to her. It makes zero difference if she's Muslim or has had a bad experience or has just decided that's what she wants. You accommodate her. It's common enough for Christians as well in my experience and even for men not to want to ...


1

Re: "At the same time she decided to join a team from a different culture so it should be expected that she eventually adjusts to some of the local culture, and her team, rather than the opposite." This may not be supported by legislation in your jurisdiction, which is likely to refer to the common test of "bona fide job requirements". If ...


12

If the concern is about a muslim woman being alone with a man in a room, it seems like a solution might be to have a video 1:1 from different rooms.


8

My suggestion would be to not try to solve this on your own, and instead, seek guidance from HR. This is the kind of situation which, if poorly handled, even if you act in good faith, may become a lot of trouble. I am talking lawsuit-level of trouble. For that reason, I would also recommend to start looking for yourself, and be very cautious on your ...


6

Take the matter to your HR department and let them formulate a solution to it. It may well be that they send someone from HR to attend any of these one-to-one meetings where the other party feels it desirable, religion being but one reason for such arrangements. I think it is no longer (if it ever really was) good enough for division directors to take the ...


4

Look for the shared goals. You write The objective of a 1:1 is to allow an open conversation between manager and the team member and, to me, a private environment such as a conference room promotes that objective, as well as allowing for employee privacy. Having 1:1 in such an environment unhindered from public distraction is a benefit and something to be ...


0

I assume her problem is that for religious or whatever reasons, she doesn't want to or cannot be alone in a room with a man who isn't a close relative or her husband. Your problem is that you want to have an open conversation that cannot be overheard, so you can both say whatever needs to be said. In that situation, I think inviting any woman to sit in your ...


45

It's strange that nobody seems to have explicitly said this, but The objective of a 1:1 is to allow an open conversation between manager and the team member and, to me, a private environment such as a conference room promotes that objective, as well as allowing for employee privacy. If allowing open conversation from employee side is the main and real ...


19

I'm a Muslim man and I faced couple of situations where each time I have to meet with a women colleague in my office or in a meeting room. In many cases the colleague was not a Muslim (that is to say; the issue like the one you exposed is not a thing for them). As a Muslim I can't allow myself to be with a woman in a space which is closed or is out of sight, ...


19

tl,dr: Whatever you do can you get you into serious trouble. Let HR handle it. I'm happy to accommodate whatever makes someone else happy UNLESS it requires discrimination against other people and this one seems to cross a line. So Alice can't have a 1:1 with Bob but she can have one with Beatrice ? What happens if Billy or Billie poke a meeting in her ...


7

The only option, assuming you want to continue working with her in the same team, is to accommodate her request. Explain to her why the 1:1 meeting is important and ask her where she would be comfortable doing it. As long as she offers a reasonable location, accept and “casually” offer the same option to the other team members. NB: By “casually”, I mean in a ...


57

I would reasonably accommodate her requests but also explain her some boundaries: The first thing is that her concerns are important for her, so they can't be dismissed. At the same time she decided to join a team from a different culture, so it should be expected that she eventually adjusts to some of the local culture, and her team, rather than the ...


6

The objective of a 1:1 is to allow an open conversation between manager and the team member Yes, but that doesn't extend to being able to allow a (mutually agreed upon) third party to attend these meetings. For example, it is perfectly fine to want to invite a third party to an HR meeting when you e.g. feel under the gun. However, context applies. If this ...


1

Don't take your side. As you noted, you like to avoid hierarchy and ensure individuals are free to express themselves. She has expressed herself, and noted a personal like, one that may well be legally protected on religious grounds. You could take your side and order her to do what you want because you're the boss and you can fire her, but that would go ...


137

To what extent should I accomodate her requests? To the extent that you accommodate any request that you could extend to all your other team members as well. If it is no problem to offer a solution to all team members equally, just do so. Alternatives have already been named: Bring someone from HR (sounds very formal though) Have the meeting in a space ...


18

Try to find a middle ground: A conference room with a glass front, leaving the door open. That way, people on the hallway could overhear, but mostly don't. The quiet spot in the canteen mentioned is good. If you both smoke you could stand in the smoker area, a few meters separate from all other smokers. Generally, somewhere where you can have some amount ...


19

It has nothing to do with you personally. Just have someone from HR attend the meeting. Or someone she is ok with (eg. Coworker) on the condition the meeting is still a 1:1 and discussions are only between you two. Put in the open might not be a good if people are nearby, but something like a canteen with a quiet spot might be suitable.


0

As a guiding principle, with very few exceptions - you should never trash your previous employment. If you want to show difference - praise new / potential place as new horizon, aligned with your current goals, place where you can grow personally and professionally etc


0

It depends on what the new job is doing. If you apply for a job doing exactly the same work and say you're unfulfilled in the interview then the interviewer should be concerned. After all, if you find yourself unfulfilled packing widgets for OldCompany, why should you find packing widgets fulfilling at NewCompany? If the work is something different then it's ...


0

Generally speaking, it will not. except you have a reference case. Because generally speaking, if the company terminate your contract, they have to pay. Who would prefer to pay you when you decide to go?? If you really worry about it, then make sure your manager or HR don't know where you leave your current company. You could choose not mention where you go, ...


0

They may find out. So? They will find out the start and end-dates of his employment. I know of no companies that care if you collect unemployment. What they care is if you are currently employed, not currently employed, and how long you have not been employed...all of this is available to future employer.


8

California is at will. They can fire you instantly. However they tend not to do that- it makes people in the company upset. Its more normal that you give 2 weeks notice, and then they decide to just pay you to sit those 2 weeks if you're leaving to a competitor. But they're not forced to do that, just like you're not forced to give 2 weeks notice. It's ...


3

No employer can know if a potential employee drew unemployment, as it is not public information. See the US Department of Labor website for more info. The former company will know, but if they divulge that info it will open them up to liability.


11

As long as you make the separation about you and not about your previous (or current) employer, you'll be fine. As you're describing it, you're seeking more fulfillment in your work. You just need to be able to define what that fulfillment looks like for you. It shouldn't reference any part of why it's not fulfilling in your current or previous role. It ...


1

While not at the contracting company I was at, we did have a situation like that unfold but in a morbid way. This guy got hired on this contract but he was more interested in the life insurance policy than anything else. It was very odd and strange but they said if he passed away while employed, his spouse would get a full year's pay regardless of when he ...


2

I am not a lawyer, but a few things to consider: Contract of employment is a legally binding Intent to defraud While I think it would be possible, so is committing any other crime. I don't think it would be hard to discover, and you could find yourself in trouble. While not a lawyer I can't see how this doesn't count as fraud and breach of contract.


13

Will it work? Probably for one position or two. You might get 2-5 free months of salary out of it. You would also ruin your professional reputation, even if not detected as fraud. Your own plan is to look so unqualified that you get fired from multiple jobs in a row (or in parallel actually). So yeah, if you need money quickly and don't plan on having a good ...


0

Of course. Entering a contract in bad will can work like any other scam or illegal behavior. Do you have three months of pay guaranteed from day one? Sounds weird (especially to deter frauds like you)


8

Your unsubstantiated claims have significantly hurt someone's reputation. An apology is the least you can do, if you do in fact respect your coworkers. You have accused a coworker of personally profiting from racial discrimination. I don't think I need to elaborate how much this alleged behavior is considered unethical and immoral by current day standards. ...


3

Not sure what kinds of tropes you have been exposed to, but in general a few things to consider: 1- In many workplaces, people are very nice and expect you to be very nice. Sure, we will all have to deal with difficult people over time, but while showing conflict at work is essential to any movie or TV show that depicts a workplace, everyone is better off ...


4

I was the subject of this question The OP deleted his account after he got outed in the office for posting it 🤦‍♂️ Anyways, I wound up quitting for many of the reasons cited by the OP and figured I could at least speak to some of the answers. The only answer is to find other work for this employee that they would consider engaging and motivating. That may ...


7

This is one of the few times HR is your friend Her boss thinks that her limping around makes the team seem "wimpy" and "unready" to clients (who are not visiting anyway because COVID). He either wants her to take unpaid time off or fire her. I was under the impression that this was illegal, but I also think that I am wrong as he emailed ...


31

That's a tricky one. In essence your wife's boss has given her the keys to the Ferrari but you need to consider carefully what you want to do with it. What her boss has done is clearly illegal discrimination and he was stupid enough to actually put it in writing. No "well known" CA tech company can afford to condone this. First thing you should do ...


0

How badly do you need the job? If you can get another suitable job within a tolerable amount of time, then realize you have the power. And to answer your question, no, it is not reasonable to expect you to travel both ways on your dime. In the USA, this would normally mean you'd be reimbursed "for mileage" which includes fuel and wear-and-tear on ...


20

For a large tech firm in the US as you described, it would be illegal to fire an employee due to a disability or temporary injury. That would be a form of illegal discrimination. You may want to consult a labour-law lawyer in California if the boss actually emailed your wife telling her that he would fire her due to her temporary injury. It appears that ...


3

Nathan, I have been working in Russia and the US. In both countries the employer is interested in using you for less money. You sell your time, your life and health. Employer gets your time, ideas, sweat and tear in exchange for money. You must establish personal boundries and requesting coverage for commute time is one of the basic things. Don't be afraid ...


2

You can totally say no. However, people do remember who is flexible and who is not and use that knowledge when filling higher up positions that require flexibility. So, you can do whatever you want, but it can hurt your career.


0

You're not being unreasonable, but you'll want to be looking for a new job as soon as possible. From your perspective, this company has a culture and expectations that you don't care for; why would you work there? From your employer's perspective, they got work to do and need people with a certain work ethic; why would they want to keep you around?


5

I agree with much of what's already been said. This answer is about proposing a compromise that can work well in some situations. The mode of transport is important, as is the nature of the work. If there's a fast train, and you can work on the train, then everyone should be happy with you doing the majority of the journey during normal working hours, ...


15

I think if they require you to work off-site, you can ask them if they can provide accommodation for you for that 2 months, eg. book a hotel room or Airbnb. My example: I work in the UK, and from time to time I'm being asked to support sites in other cities in the country, and the other company books me a hotel and car/transport ticket (if the site is more ...


55

No, you are not being unreasonable for not wanting to have that extra commute imposed on you. You were hired to work on Office A from X hour to Y. What should happen is that you go to work at Office A at X. Then, if they want you to be on Office B you would travel there during your work hours, and travel back from there so you can check out of local office ...


113

Ask for the commute to be part of your working hours or ask for overtime pay.


4

Do companies insist on tests or test results to prove the disability? No. Medical examinations are not their job. And even if they would (which would be crazy) it would not help them, since they ask because of laws and regulations and those do not really allow "self-certified" disabilities, neither by the patient, nor by a company. Companies care ...


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