84

Toughen up a bit. At this level, it's been one comment, poking fun at something you posted. It's obnoxious, but it's certainly not HR-level, and the fact that you think it is suggests that your sensitivity meter is dialed up too high by at least a few notches. You can offer cogent argument in the comments about how what you're suggesting is not the same ...


60

I think you are misreading the social cues here. From the now-deleted screenshot of the chat, the sequence of postings is: You make a posting asking for better quality toilet paper. Someone (M) makes a straightforward reply that you need to go to facilities, who handle this. You then post asking if a bidet spray is an option. Another person (A) posts that ...


38

You are confounding this worker's personal life - which has nothing to do with you - and their professional behavior. Professionally, this worker: has "above average" technical skill: fair enough, so do many other people has several behavioral issues has disregarded the direct feedback of their direct manager: you At this point, you have done what you can: ...


29

Be direct - if no one's said anything to him then he probably thinks no one cares. Mate, that's really gross, you need to do it somewhere else. If you're worried that it might be perceived as offensive then speak to your manager privately first and get their input.


27

I seriously doubt that AR is going to mock you for asking about better toilet paper. What he will mock you for is acting as if a juvenile joke about toilet paper is a personal attack against you. If you take this mishmash to HR they are most likely to tell you that just because you have a sensitive asshole it is no reason for you to be a sensitive asshole. ...


12

Seems like you shouldn't be the one considering moving, since you're not the one at fault here. As Kilisi said in a comment, you're gonna meet all kinds of people in your working life - some will grow to be your friends, others will just be straight up assholes. That's life! Anyway, if you only have a few months left at this job, I'd just sit it out if I ...


10

Short answer: Don't lie. Longer answer: Your professional reputation has value If you participate in this fraud, and yes, it is fraud, by "Company A", you will be in the very least tarnishing yourself as being a liar, untrustworthy, and unprofessional. You could expose yourself to legal troubles IANAL and you should check with one as depending on the ...


10

Do not put a blind eye to it. The attitude you're describing is not that uncommon in juniors especially when they have some sort of technical expertise as you say. That's not to say that you must tolerate it. You say you have already tried to communicate to him that you are not satisfied with his non-technical skills, and that he has disregarded it. The ...


9

Is the total extent of AR's mockery this one post? If so, I really think you need to calm down. What do you expect HR to do? Do you think they're going to fire him because he made one snide remark about toilet paper? Or even give him some sort of formal reprimand? In a normal, healthy workplace, people joke around with each other all the time. Trying to ...


9

I've done a bit of reading about UK employment law, and I have some good news. From https://www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/1998/1833/regulation/6/made (1) A night worker’s normal hours of work in any reference period which is applicable in his case shall not exceed an average of eight hours for each 24 hours. (2) An employer shall take all reasonable ...


9

Sometimes doing something will make the situation worse. If your TL has indicated that he has dealt with it, you should trust him, as you appear to do so. You don't know what's going on in the guys head. There could be work pressures, personal life pressures etc. In addition, nobody likes their team being "told off" despite how delicately you may have ...


8

The average person farts 15 times in a day; some as many as 40 times per day Yeah, I can kinda understand finding it disgusting - I had a coworker that did the same thing. But at the end of the day, it's ultimately an unavoidable biological necessity, and chances are: everyone around you is also farting... they're just quieter about it (and possibly eating ...


7

Your company can do a lot of things legally you don’t like. But this isn’t your company doing it, it’s your deputy manager. So step one is that you tell your deputy manager you are not coming. You never worked on that day, and you are not starting it. If there’s a problem it’s because the deputy manager gave four people the day off, for his own selfish ...


6

Let him play the TL. There is nothing wrong with letting Tom act as team lead, and it might be just what Anne wants. There might be two reasons why Tom acts this way: 1.) Anne sees a need for a TL for your group and decided to groom Tom for this position. It is quite common to let people be an acting team lead before officially promoting someone. The fact ...


6

First of all, there are some things that are not your concern at all: if she's married and cheats it's not your problem and it's not your place even to judge, it's her private life and you are not part of it. The only concerning thing about this could be the unprofessional behaviour, especially if flirting with the customers is frowned upon (how it is ...


6

Maybe I should talk to my boss and try to convince him that people at C will learn that I left anyway? I think that is your best strategy. I suggest pointing out to your Company A boss that Company C people are going to see the update to your LinkedIn profile after you leave A. Claiming you are on sick leave is going to look really silly when your ...


5

I was in a similar situation once - I was employed by a parent company to work at a client company, and when I resigned my manager asked to say nothing, so the company I was body-shopped out to would stay happy. I did what my employer asked. I stayed in contact with some of my ex colleagues from the client company, and when they found out that I didn't work ...


5

In my experience, these two points apply here: If you do not fix a problem but leave it on its own, over time it usually gets worse and not better. Then all you will have is a bigger problem, causing more pain, and costing more to fix. If that person was such a character that he can correct himself, especially after hearing it from you a few times, he would ...


5

The other answers are right that you need to address this, however I'll add that a reluctance to admit mistakes or lack of knowledge is sometimes a sign of insecurity, and sometimes a cultural habit. Some people have grown up in situations where admitting any kind of weakness would instantly put them at a big disadvantage. Make sure your junior knows that ...


4

how do I react to it Ultimately, that's a question that needs a personal answer based on your own goals and your feelings. No one likes to be mocked, especially when making a helpful suggestion about a sensitive topic. But it's important to also keep in mind that those who mock are often just looking for attention - they want to get a rise out of you, and ...


4

Your colleague could have some kind of bowel condition (Chron's, IBS, whatever else) and might have less control over their farts than they'd like to or realise. The fart could be a sudden "get to the bathroom" warning shot. Alternatively, sometimes a fart is just a fart. They could be uncomfortable talking about it, or they might just not care about it. ...


3

Speak to your subordinate in private, and let him know that his behavior is unacceptable, and should it continue, you will be escalating it. To do this: begin in a positive way Address the behavior, not the person Correct him. Avoid the word "but", it makes you seem insincere. When correcting be clear and outline What he's doing What is wrong with it ...


3

Should I just quit (two weeks notice for sure) or should I just transfer? Don't quit without having a job to go to. Quitting because things are difficult is not always the best solution and could get to be a habit. Besides, I would assume you are working because you need the money. Seek a transfer. Or find a new job first, work out the notice period, ...


3

As far as I know you don't have any legal rights in this situation. But you should be telling the deputy manager you already have plans for Saturday that you cannot reschedule, if that fails ask the manager if you must. Family dominated businesses it is usually best to give the family a bit of leeway if at all possible. Often in a two job situation you ...


2

I've worked in IT for over twenty years so I know it can be stressful. I also know that there can be some big egos involved from time to time. I would recommend taking him aside quietly to try to clear the air. More face to face communication rather than email. Emails can be so easily taken out of context. Praise in public, scold in private. If this ...


2

You are disobeying instructions from your manager. Stop doing that. my manager asks me for a feedback on his behavior but ... There is no but. From your comment it is clear that there may be a backstory you are not aware of. It's quite possible this behavior is something that has been formally raised (e.g. via HR) with this employee before and their ...


1

He never acknowledges his mistakes (...) he always finds a way or tries to cover with excuses So either he suffers on primadonna syndrome, or he works in some toxical environment, where you are blamed for your mistakes, instead of being encouraged to learn from them. Whenever I am explaining some stuff to him, he gives a kind of response that he ...


1

Helena's answer is quite good already, but to make a few extra points: 1-If you had proof that Tom and Anne have more than a friendship going on, this would justify having a discrete chat with HR. Give them evidence, not hearsay. In any decent company, relatives or love interests should not be allowed to be in a manger-subordinate position. Then again, your ...


1

I'd imagine it'd be really awkward to confront them in person making a show in front of everyone else, especially since you mentioned you work in an open area. Does your company use any collaboration software like Slack or Mattermost? If so, I'd start there. You can always approach them directly as a plan B. Find the person by their name (or ask around if ...


1

Opinion: I think it is unlikely that they can compel you to work unusual hours at such short notice. Obviously they can't physically force you and if they try to fire you then I don't think a court would find they have done so with reasonable cause. I am not a lawyer. If you want to go down this route then you should get some kind of legal advice, ideally ...


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