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Ex-friend is telling people I know that "I'm amazed she hasn't been fired yet" behind my back and I don't know what to do about it. She isn't known to cause drama or speak Ill of people so I'm pretty sure everyone is on the edge of believing her and questioning my employability.

She doesn't know where I work nor what I do. She doesn't have any evidence to back up her opinion.

I'm known around the office as a competent and trust worthy employee, I don't know whether this will make it back to my employer but I thought it'd be safe to ask here:
What should I do to prepare for any of this?
Is this slander or defamation?
Should I go to HR and explain the situation to them?

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  • 4
    So, basically she is telling this to your mutual friends, not your current colleagues, right?
    – DarkCygnus ♦
    Commented Mar 5, 2019 at 23:11
  • 10
    If she isn't known for causing drama or speaking ill of people, why is she doing so now?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Commented Mar 5, 2019 at 23:18
  • 21
    "She doesn't know where I work or what I do." - how would her comments reach your employer?
    – P. Hopkinson
    Commented Mar 5, 2019 at 23:25
  • 3
    “What should I do to prepare for any of this?“ What situation are you anticipating that would require preparation? What do you think is going to happen?
    – AffableAmbler
    Commented Mar 5, 2019 at 23:28
  • 5
    Maybe it's time to kick her out of your friends circle
    – Stupid_Intern
    Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 6:55

2 Answers 2

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Is this slander or defamation?

Well, surely this is speaking bad of you, and perhaps seeking to hurt your professional reputation.

This could well be because this woman is jealous of you or your professional success.

Should I go to HR and explain the situation to them?

Absolutely not.

This woman does not work in your company (nor is she telling these things to your coworkers), so this is not an issue HR should be handling.

What should I do to prepare for any of this?

Continue doing whatever you are doing to be considered "around the office as a competent and trust worthy employee".

In other words, keep up the good work. Her telling this only to your friends will hardly have any consequences in your job. It would be very unwise and weird of her part to try to reach out to your coworkers to tell them this, as they know you are a good worker and will not be easily carried on by gossip from a stranger.

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    Even if her comments did reach people who matter, some random person thinking somebody else should be fired isn't grounds for termination. If it were, probably everyone, everywhere would have been fired.
    – Ed Grimm
    Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 1:11
  • Might add to this to try and capture some proof that this women is saying untrue things about you to people. That way if something does become of this you have evidence for a potential slander case.
    – Bill Leeper
    Commented Mar 6, 2019 at 19:37
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She doesn't know where I work or what I do. She doesn't have any evidence to back up her opinion.

I think that right there is all that really matters. It is a non-issue.

Don't go to HR or even bother mentioning this to anyone at your workplace. All that matters is your comment:

I'm known around the office as a competent and trust worthy employee

Have a cup of tea, relax, continue with your job and pay no attention to the haters.

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