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It might be a strange question, but where does it make sense to select between the two approaches:

  • Someone is my boss. I shut up and accept what they say, and
  • Discussions and trying to convince my boss?

My boss tells me I haven't done something that I have done a lot. Or that he told me something which he definitely didn't. E.g. I'm responsible for project scheduling and budgeting. I share info with him and the propose course of action. I ask him to confirm that we can start. He doesn't. Then he says, in a meeting, in front of other people that the project hasn't been scheduled or assigned a specific budget. These situations frustrate me a lot. On the other hand, he doesn't let me explain him that that's not really the truth.

Realistically speaking, what is the right way to do in this situation? I'm afraid that when I shut up he will lose respect towards me. On the other hand, when I say something he doesn't listen anyway.

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  • Then he says, in a meeting, in front of other people that the project hasn't been scheduled or assigned a specific budget.. did you interrupt him and tried to correct his statement at that point only? Something like "Hey, sorry to interrupt Jim, but I believe a communication was made on date DD-MM-YYYY, but is waiting for your feedback/ comments. Do you have any thoughts on that?".
    – Sourav Ghosh
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 11:20
  • I think the question leaves unclear is boss is underreporting for unexplained reasons, or if the boss is publicly blaming OP for project delays. I do think the boss has the right to control the narrative of the project in the eyes of third parties, as long as the boss is liable for everything. If the boss publicly points a specific employee as being the bottleneck, then that would hardly be acceptable, even if he was telling the truth. If boss both lies and nominally blames one employee, that some serious issue.
    – Mefitico
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 14:21

3 Answers 3

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IMHO, move your communication to a tangible media.

Even if you get a phone call, follow it up with an email, stating what was discussed in the call and, if needed, ask for confirmation, phrase it as - did i get this right?

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  • I deliver everything per email, so I can prove that I've delivered it. What does that change?
    – user552523
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 16:01
  • @user552523 in that case every time boss "forgets" , forward it to him
    – Strader
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 16:05
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Keep documentation.

My boss tells me I haven't done something that I have done a lot.

I would recommend that you start maintaining daily notes / documentation on what it is that you're doing.

Or that he told me something which he definitely didn't.

Start taking notes during meetings and email him the minutes of the meeting. This way you will have a track of what has been / hasn't been said.

Then he says, in a meeting, in front of other people that the project hasn't been scheduled or assigned a specific budget.

That's your boss covering himself in front of the other people so as to not look bad. Your best bet is to keep documentation so that if people come to you, you can show that you indeed did do your job.

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in front of other people that the project hasn't been scheduled or assigned a specific budget.

You just stay quiet at this point. You shouldn't contradict your boss in front of third parties.

These situations frustrate me a lot.

They shouldn't frustrate you at all, it's not your responsibility, it's your bosses.

You need to look at things differently, don't let your morale be dictated by the actions or inactions of others.

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  • One thing I would add - stay quiet but write this stuff down, take notes of such incidents so eventually you will have enough ammunition when, inevitably, you will have to confront the boss.
    – Aida Paul
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 11:27
  • But if OP is responsible for something (as they say), and that particular work is not done - does it not mean OP did not do their job?
    – Sourav Ghosh
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 11:27
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    @SouravGhosh op isn't responsible, the boss is, if the boss wants to say it's not ready, thats his problem. Could even be a valid reason the boss doesn't want it to be ready. But thats where the buck stops
    – Kilisi
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 11:34
  • @Kilisi Sorry If I'm missing something, I copy verbatim from the question....."I'm responsible for project scheduling and budgeting"...and "that the project hasn't been scheduled or assigned a specific budget."
    – Sourav Ghosh
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 11:36
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    @SouravGhosh yes, I read it as 'responsible to the boss' not to any third party. If the OP is responsible to third parties, then the boss is not the boss
    – Kilisi
    Commented Oct 23, 2020 at 11:37

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